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Thread: Ask an ESFJ

  1. #181
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    In what ways are you like the other SJ types? In what ways do you differ from other SJ types? What about NJ types (especially ENFJs, because of the dominant Fe)? What traits do you think are unique, then, to ESFJs or maybe just xSFJs?

  2. #182
    climb on Showbread's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DreamBeliever View Post
    In what ways are you like the other SJ types? In what ways do you differ from other SJ types? What about NJ types (especially ENFJs, because of the dominant Fe)? What traits do you think are unique, then, to ESFJs or maybe just xSFJs?
    Similarities to other SJs:
    - Love structure
    - Rely heavily on experience to reason out new experiences
    - Hesitant to jump into the unfamiliar head first
    - Values and priorities are set pretty firmly, it takes some really solid arguments to question them
    - Reliable
    - Conscientious

    Different from STJs
    - A little less rigid about values, especially if emotions are engaged
    - More value on being good/compassionate than being correct
    - Less goal oriented, a bit more flexible and open to other options

    Different from NJs
    - More practical, more emphasis on details. An NJ makes an excellent visionary, but an SJ is better at executing the vision
    - Less conceptual, probably not quite as imaginative
    - More cautious, probably less likely to have a "go big or go home approach"
    - More social savvy

    SFJs specifically
    - Nurturing
    - Aware of the feelings of others
    - We plan our lives around other people more than any other type
    - Easy to guilt trip, we run from shame like the plague
    Friends, waffles, work

    "The problem is, when you depend on a substitute for love, you can never get enough" - Louis Cozolino

    3w2 6w7 1w2
    *Gryffindor*

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  3. #183
    I could do things Hard's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Showbread View Post
    - Easy to guilt trip, we run from shame like the plague
    This is an interesting distinction I have noticed between NFJ's and SFJ's. Both are sensitive to shame (I'm more sensitive to other things related to it, but it does get to me a lot). That said, NFJ's are very very difficult to guilt trip (guilt trips don't work on me). Consequently this is why I often see SFJ's as far less stubborn, despite the stereotype of them being more so.
    MBTI: ExxJ tetramer
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    External Perception: Nohari and Johari


  4. #184
    Senior Member great_bay's Avatar
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    So would you date ENFP's?

  5. #185
    climb on Showbread's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by great_bay View Post
    So would you date ENFP's?
    Um, it would depend a LOT on the ENFP. I wouldn't not date someone simply on the basis of type. However, ENFPs have a lot of characteristics that I would find difficult in a SO. So, I guess my answer is that I don't see myself being able to have a successful relationship with an ENFP. But, I wouldn't immediately dismiss someone because they told me they were an ENFP.

    I really do love ENFPs, especially as friends. I have a few ENFP friends who I absolutely love. But I don't think I've ever had romantic feelings for anyone who wasn't a "T" type.
    Friends, waffles, work

    "The problem is, when you depend on a substitute for love, you can never get enough" - Louis Cozolino

    3w2 6w7 1w2
    *Gryffindor*


  6. #186
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    What do you admire about other MBTI types?

  7. #187
    Senior Member great_bay's Avatar
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    What is your greatest intellectual accomplishment?

  8. #188
    climb on Showbread's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Luke O View Post
    What do you admire about other MBTI types?
    I tend to admire more carefree types that don't sweat the small thing, mostly xxFPs.

    Quote Originally Posted by great_bay View Post
    What is your greatest intellectual accomplishment?
    Hmmm. What do you mean by that exactly? Honestly, I don't really set intellectual goals for myself, per say. I love to learn, and I love to challenge myself. In school I always took more difficult courses than I had to because I would rather be challenged than get an easy "A". I would say my academic career has been a pretty big accomplishment so far considering I have ADHD working against me but still managed to graduate from university in 4 years, with honors.
    Friends, waffles, work

    "The problem is, when you depend on a substitute for love, you can never get enough" - Louis Cozolino

    3w2 6w7 1w2
    *Gryffindor*

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  9. #189
    this is my winter song EJCC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Showbread View Post
    Different from STJs
    ...
    - Less goal oriented, a bit more flexible and open to other options
    This is interesting to me. Why would Fe/Ti mean being less goal oriented? I would have assumed that Je types in general would be equally like that.
    ~ g e t f e s t i v e ! ~


    EJCC: "The Big Questions in my life right now: 1) What am I willing to live with? 2) What do I have to live with? 3) What can I change for the better?"
    Coriolis: "Is that the ESTJ Serenity Prayer?"



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  10. #190
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    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    This is interesting to me. Why would Fe/Ti mean being less goal oriented? I would have assumed that Je types in general would be equally like that.
    Honestly, I'm not sure. I don't exactly remember my reasoning with this. Maybe STJs just tend to have more concrete, measurable goals. Where as my goals are more like "spend more time with person X" or "learn to be a better friend"? Because as I think more about it I tend to get tunnel vision about things I want to accomplish as well.
    Friends, waffles, work

    "The problem is, when you depend on a substitute for love, you can never get enough" - Louis Cozolino

    3w2 6w7 1w2
    *Gryffindor*


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