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  1. #11
    Junior Member Krwheel's Avatar
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    I'd kinda like to revive this topic. I'm an ISFJ and recently accepted that I'm anorexic. The hard thing about this is that I'm a male and so it was really pretty easy to hide for a while, but I realized it was going to catch up to me. So I told my family and some close friends. Even after doing that it's been hard to accept help and accept the seriousness of my problem.

    This is just one problem that people face, how do you help an ISFJ and how does and ISFJ accept help for such a huge problem?

  2. #12
    IRL is not real Cimarron's Avatar
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    Bump for importance.
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  3. #13
    No moss growing on me Giggly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Krwheel View Post
    I'd kinda like to revive this topic. I'm an ISFJ and recently accepted that I'm anorexic. The hard thing about this is that I'm a male and so it was really pretty easy to hide for a while, but I realized it was going to catch up to me. So I told my family and some close friends. Even after doing that it's been hard to accept help and accept the seriousness of my problem.

    This is just one problem that people face, how do you help an ISFJ and how does and ISFJ accept help for such a huge problem?
    Do you not eat much because you are concerned with your image or do you not eat because you don't like food?

  4. #14
    Feline Member kelric's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Krwheel View Post
    I'd kinda like to revive this topic. I'm an ISFJ and recently accepted that I'm anorexic. The hard thing about this is that I'm a male and so it was really pretty easy to hide for a while, but I realized it was going to catch up to me. So I told my family and some close friends. Even after doing that it's been hard to accept help and accept the seriousness of my problem.

    This is just one problem that people face, how do you help an ISFJ and how does and ISFJ accept help for such a huge problem?
    I know almost nothing about anorexia, but I think that although accepting the truth to yourself is definitely the first step (and good for you ), the second should be to consult a professional - probably starting with your doctor, who can probably direct you to any other resources that you may need, including such things as support groups, etc.

    I'm tempted to try to say more about things that I think would help, but truly I just don't know enough to have a good opinion on it... but I'm confident that the next step would be to see a professional to help you come to terms with the seriousness of it (I say this as you mentioned it specifically) and help you find out the best way to take steps to address it. Don't put it off - commit to a concrete action now. It's all too easy to make a small (but not large enough) change, and then slip back into bad habits. You need to address it the right way, and your doctor will be able to help you find out what that may be.

    I hope things go well!
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  5. #15
    Junior Member Krwheel's Avatar
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    The interesting thing for me as an anorexic is that it really started with just healthy dieting. But then I got a little bit carried away with it and it came to the point that it was almost a hobby to avoid eating. So really some of it is image and I think that's the biggest problem to overcome, but it has also become an issue that I've convinced my mind that food makes me sick.

    I have actually had a good week with the holidays though, it's hard to avoid eating at family parties and I made sure that the people closest to me wouldn't let me starve myself in the days following, because I knew it would be a time that I'd want to make up for eating.

    I think that the whole thing of having a plan of action is right. I do have an appointment scheduled with a therapist and I have friends and family that I've told that are supposed to make sure I eat. The biggest issue that's affecting me now though is that as an ISFJ I still worry about other people around me a lot and I minimize my problem as I try to help others. It's kinda been hard to figure out how to balance my personality's natural inclination and staying focused on the problem that I need to face.

  6. #16
    No moss growing on me Giggly's Avatar
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    I'm not a doctor but maybe you could eat more of the things you do like everyday until you get used to eating bigger portions and get to a healthy weight. I'm a firm believer that the stomach stretches and shrinks according to how much you normally put in it. It should be done slowly though. Then maybe later you can start adding other foods that you're not used to eating little by little to get your palate and digestive system used to them.

  7. #17
    12 and a half weeks BerberElla's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hmm View Post
    Do you not eat much because you are concerned with your image or do you not eat because you don't like food?

    My ISFJ friend is very underweight too, she is barely 6 stone. Not because she in concerned about her image, but because she doesn't like food.

    I mean she is now in a relationship with a guy who knows how to cook (she calls him "the feeder" lol) but if she can avoiding eating, she will. Not only that but she is a very active person, her jobs demands a great physical strain from her so even when she does eat she burns it off with long bike rides and gruelling hours of labouring and landscaping.

    Is it normal Hmm? I just wondered because of your question if other ISFJ's also dislike food.
    Echo - "So are you trying to say she is Evil"

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  8. #18
    No moss growing on me Giggly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BerberElla View Post
    My ISFJ friend is very underweight too, she is barely 6 stone. Not because she in concerned about her image, but because she doesn't like food.

    I mean she is now in a relationship with a guy who knows how to cook (she calls him "the feeder" lol) but if she can avoiding eating, she will. Not only that but she is a very active person, her jobs demands a great physical strain from her so even when she does eat she burns it off with long bike rides and gruelling hours of labouring and landscaping.

    Is it normal Hmm? I just wondered because of your question if other ISFJ's also dislike food.
    6 Stone = 84 pounds so yeah that does sound like a problem.

    I'm pretty thin myself and I'm 8.2 Stone at 5'7". I wouldn't want to weigh 6 Stone.

    I imagine it will be difficult to talk to her about though, without her feeling put down. I mean, I HATE HATE HATE when people tell me I'm too skinny.

    I think the best way is to ask her to go on a diet with you for the new year. Don't tell her this, but her diet will be to gain weight though, not lose weight. Tell her you want ot eat healthier and want someone to do it with you for extra motivation. You can make meal plans and such with extra calories/meals added into hers. I wouldn't be surprised if ISFJ's tend to stop eating when they are stressed (I know I do) She may be skipping meals.

  9. #19
    Summer laintpe's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Krwheel View Post
    I'd kinda like to revive this topic. I'm an ISFJ and recently accepted that I'm anorexic. The hard thing about this is that I'm a male and so it was really pretty easy to hide for a while, but I realized it was going to catch up to me. So I told my family and some close friends. Even after doing that it's been hard to accept help and accept the seriousness of my problem.

    This is just one problem that people face, how do you help an ISFJ and how does and ISFJ accept help for such a huge problem?
    I read further down that you eat more when your friends and family encourage you to... how are you handling the anxiety? I think it's a good sign that you are not feeling anger towards them... I used to have what you have and I didn't like anyone who would try to make me eat. A few other questions... are you just forgetting/not thinking about eating... or are you constantly thinking about/obsessing over how to avoid food? Can you sleep...? Also, are you exercising on top of not eating? I struggled with eating disorders from 14-19 and I think the hardest part is learning how to eat normally (just in terms of breakfast-lunch-dinner) while accepting that losing an eating disorder does not mean you are becoming lax with discipline. There is just so much to say about it... If you feel comfortable you can PM me... I immersed myself in ED research when I was dying to be healthy again... I cannot stress how great it is that you are seeking help though... I hope you'll be able to recover without developing any permanent health complications.

  10. #20
    12 and a half weeks BerberElla's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hmm View Post
    6 Stone = 84 pounds so yeah that does sound like a problem.

    I'm pretty thin myself and I'm 8.2 Stone at 5'7". I wouldn't want to weigh 6 Stone.

    I imagine it will be difficult to talk to her about though, without her feeling put down. I mean, I HATE HATE HATE when people tell me I'm too skinny.

    I think the best way is to ask her to go on a diet with you for the new year. Don't tell her this, but her diet will be to gain weight though, not lose weight. Tell her you want ot eat healthier and want someone to do it with you for extra motivation. You can make meal plans and such with extra calories/meals added into hers. I wouldn't be surprised if ISFJ's tend to stop eating when they are stressed (I know I do) She may be skipping meals.

    Well I would never tell her she was too skinny, I am very sensitive when it comes to weight criticism (being a recovered anorexic/bulimic myself) and I know when her mother (ESFJ) criticises her for it it makes her feel less inclined to eat and even crappier about herself.

    Her boyfriend said it and she was very upset, she feels like she is being forced to eat when he checks up on her food intake daily. Which is why she calls him the feeder.

    It sounds like a good idea, I was intending a change to my diet in the new year as it happens lol so I will broach it with her and see what she has to say.

    She is 6 months pregnant too, at 6 stone, so it's not healthy for her or the baby.

    Thanks for the advice Hmm.
    Echo - "So are you trying to say she is Evil"

    DeWitt - "Something far worse, she's an Idealist"

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