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  1. #31
    Stansmith
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    I live in a bubble, so I tend to assume people will automatically get the context of what I'm saying. It might be Fi and Pe. I probably wouldn't interpret it the way she did though.

  2. #32
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by tinker683 View Post
    Hey all,

    I'm posting this to my fellow SJs as I'm curious if this may be an Si thing or if its just me, but...

    Am I the only one who really hates it when someone can't give you a straight answer? For example, when I ask a friend of mine, "How'd your night go?" And the conversation follows as:

    Them: "was good! We stayed out late, I only got a few hours of sleep."
    Me: "why, what happened?"
    Them: "what do you mean?"
    Me: "why were you out so late?"
    Them: "we were out late because we were out late. Are you mad at me or something?"

    Now see, at this point, I don't really care a whole lot about why they were out so late, I'm just curious at that point as to why it is they're giving me such non descript answers. It's like an alarm bell goes off in my head and I start to wonder, "what's up with this? Why are they answering me in this fashion?" And I become intensely curious.

    Apparently this offends some people. Am I the only one who gets like this? I this an Si or perhaps an inferior Ne thing?
    Oh god really?

    Can I answer here or this an sj forum?

    But they're not being evasive to be evasive if that makes sense. They likely just wanted to give a brief description. Some people don't like to bore others with the details.

  3. #33
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    Never mind. Should've read more first. Maybe sometimes evasive people are being evasive on purpose.

  4. #34
    ✿ڿڰۣஇღ♥ wut ♥ღஇڿڰۣ✿ digesthisickness's Avatar
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    My first reaction to a third-degree is to escape. A lot of ISFJs approach conversation in this way. Their version of chatting makes you feel like they're accusing you of something and they come off as controlling. If you know them well, but are tired of it and no longer give a crap if they leave, then it's really very clear that one of the best ways to piss them off and feel less controlled is to be evasive.
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  5. #35
    Entertaining Cracker five sounds's Avatar
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    depends on the situation for sure.

    sometimes a person doesn't want to answer a question because it makes them uncomfortable or the time/place aren't right, and if that's the vibe i get then i try to leave it alone.

    if i think the question needs an answer and i feel the conditions aren't such that the person's at risk of like saying something in front of another person or whatever, then i can't stand them. basically if someone's avoiding something i need them to discuss in order to deal with something, and they won't give me a straight answer so we can work toward a resolution, i get frustrated.

    other than that, if it doesn't really matter or is maybe better left untouched at that time, then i'm cool with taking the signal and letting it lie.
    You hem me in -- behind and before;
    you have laid your hand upon me.
    Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
    too lofty for me to attain.

  6. #36
    Paranoid Android Video's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Coriolis View Post
    I have a double standard here. I dislike receiving evasive answers, and will press until satisfied, or told that the topic is off-limits. I will, however, always respect a direct refusal to answer. On the other hand, I am very good at giving evasive answers that somehow satisfy or at least distract the questioner, and will do so when I think the answer is none of their business, or even something I just don't want to get into now. If someone detects the evasion and confronts me directly (this is rare), I will sometimes refuse directly. Or, depending on the topic, I might give them the answer as bluntly as possible, which always produces an entertaining reaction from them, causing them to regret asking in the first place.
    Relatable, but I think I should open up more in the future after reading the thread.

    I disclose very little to others for no reason other than preference and didn't understand how that affected other types of people, especially on an everyday basis such as in the OP. It sounds like putting your own feelings about talking above the other person's. Reading about how this behavior can come off as devious or undermine relational trust, I do not think it's okay upon consideration to put someone in that position in situations where your reason is so much smaller, like just not feeling like talking at the moment, or not thinking what you have to say is interesting, or just not liking to talk about what you do. No one has to be an open book, but that's just flippant. I don't think being an open book is necessary, but don't want to be like this.
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  7. #37
    Paranoid Android Video's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Coriolis View Post
    I have a double standard here. I dislike receiving evasive answers, and will press until satisfied, or told that the topic is off-limits. I will, however, always respect a direct refusal to answer. On the other hand, I am very good at giving evasive answers that somehow satisfy or at least distract the questioner, and will do so when I think the answer is none of their business, or even something I just don't want to get into now. If someone detects the evasion and confronts me directly (this is rare), I will sometimes refuse directly. Or, depending on the topic, I might give them the answer as bluntly as possible, which always produces an entertaining reaction from them, causing them to regret asking in the first place.
    Relatable. Preferring not to disclose is my default, but taking in this thread and the affect that has on other personalities made me think.

    Reading about how this behavior can come off as devious or undermine relational trust, I do not think it's okay upon consideration to put someone in that position in situations where your reason is so much smaller, like just not feeling like talking at the moment, or not thinking what you have to say is interesting, or just not liking to talk about what you do.
    4w3 6w5 1w2 sx/sp ISFP

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  8. #38
    Senior Member Qre:us's Avatar
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    Default Am I the only one who hates evasive answers?

    maybe....maybe not....

  9. #39
    Paranoid Android Video's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Qre:us View Post
    maybe....maybe not....
    ...it depends heavily on the context.
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  10. #40
    WALMART
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    You would hate me. I can't give a straight answer to save my life.

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