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  1. #91
    Senior Member Tiltyred's Avatar
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    My mother tests out ENFJ.

    And it makes sense.

    So I recant.

  2. #92
    All Natural! All Good!
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    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    anyway, my mother is truly ESFJ, i believe. she is outgoing (doesn't prefer to sit and self-reflect), detail-oriented and present-focused (doesn't prefer the abstract or big picture), interpersonally gifted (doesn't prefer hard logic), and decisive (doesn't prefer to leave things to chance). these are characteristics she has had all her life, not ones she developed to fill her "mom role". she is a teacher and handles our practical household matters - bills, groceries, vacation planning. dad is an INTP - her exact opposite in many ways. for the record, ESFJ mom and i get along fabulously.
    My mom is also a true ESFJ -- but other than her extremely Fe parenting style, she does not fit the stereotype of an ESFJ mother. She doesn't much like philosophical discussion and tends to pull it back to earth... but she has an acute sense of how people will react to events. She's also very interested in politics and people's reactions to the candidates, etc. She supports several radical changes in all directions, despite the idea that Si hates any and all changes . She is very worldly, has a lot of practical knowledge... she is not at all stupid, that ESFJ stereotype also needs to die fast. lol.

    My mom and I get along well, too. We were at odds when I was younger, but since the age of say 18 (I'm 21 now) we have gotten along MUCH better. I find I become more like her as I age, and I am better able to see the validity in her viewpoints/discussions... and I think this is because I "grew up". She hasn't changed much, I have just gained some maturity. Funny thing, isn't it -- the types of people complaining most about their ESFJ mothers, are also the types that claim they love new points of view etc.
    Strychnine is all-natural,
    So strychnine is all good.
    It's Godly and righteous,
    So eat it, you should.
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    Don't use the multiquote; it was planted by the devil to deceive us.

    Social Role: Asscrack/Piece of Shit/Public Defecator/Spiteful Urinator


    A different type everyday - so no need to type me anymore. But feel free to enjoy the sound of your own asscrack.

  3. #93
    i love skylights's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by strychnine View Post
    My mom is also a true ESFJ -- but other than her extremely Fe parenting style, she does not fit the stereotype of an ESFJ mother. She doesn't much like philosophical discussion and tends to pull it back to earth... but she has an acute sense of how people will react to events. She's also very interested in politics and people's reactions to the candidates, etc. She supports several radical changes in all directions, despite the idea that Si hates any and all changes . She is very worldly, has a lot of practical knowledge... she is not at all stupid, that ESFJ stereotype also needs to die fast. lol.
    my mom's a liberal in a number of ways and is very "down to earth" in the sense that she's very live-and-let-live. and she may prefer application to theory, but she is not stupid at all. i'm constantly impressed by her ability to plan, coordinate, and implement. i have no idea how our family would even function without her.

    Funny thing, isn't it -- the types of people complaining most about their ESFJ mothers, are also the types that claim they love new points of view etc.


    i've seen a lot of INTs complaining (not in this thread, i mean, just across the board), but i feel like there's just an INT-ESFJ mental disconnect that is hard for some parent-child pairs to overcome... the INT child sees the ESFJ parent as meddling, coddling, uninteresting... though my INTP brother has a pretty tight bond with our ESFJ mom, so there's that, too... i think the Fe/Ti connection works out for them...

  4. #94
    All Natural! All Good!
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    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    my mom's a liberal in a number of ways and is very "down to earth" in the sense that she's very live-and-let-live. and she may prefer application to theory, but she is not stupid at all. i'm constantly impressed by her ability to plan, coordinate, and implement. i have no idea how our family would even function without her.
    My mom is totally the same way. She is the most stable member of our family and does things the rest of us (who are all Ps...lol) can easily overlook or take for granted. If it weren't for her, we wouldn't function either.

    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    i've seen a lot of INTs complaining (not in this thread, i mean, just across the board), but i feel like there's just an INT-ESFJ mental disconnect that is hard for some parent-child pairs to overcome... the INT child sees the ESFJ parent as meddling, coddling, uninteresting... though my INTP brother has a pretty tight bond with our ESFJ mom, so there's that, too... i think the Fe/Ti connection works out for them...
    I agree that it can be hard for young (I)NTs to bridge the gap with SFs, especially SFJs. I would say that it takes maturity for people of vastly different types to get along, more than with similar types. And a young NT is understandably not mature. I think that is the root of the problem.

    But also there is the issue of power -- generally, the child is subordinate to the parent. The ESFJ may not want to understand / can't understand the young INT at all, and still expect to parent well, which won't work. So essentially the NT is having the wrong parenting style enforced on them, and the shit hits the fan.
    Strychnine is all-natural,
    So strychnine is all good.
    It's Godly and righteous,
    So eat it, you should.
    Who are you to refuse nature's will?


    Don't use the multiquote; it was planted by the devil to deceive us.

    Social Role: Asscrack/Piece of Shit/Public Defecator/Spiteful Urinator


    A different type everyday - so no need to type me anymore. But feel free to enjoy the sound of your own asscrack.

  5. #95
    Glycerine
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    My mom is an almost off the charts Fi INFP (officially tested...she scored close to 100% F) and my dad is an ESFJ.

    I got along with my mom pretty well but felt misunderstood because I would have to walk on eggshells constantly not to hurt her sensibilities.

  6. #96
    S Saiyan God Mace's Avatar
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    My mom's ISFJ.

    Apparently. :/

  7. #97
    Senior Member Viridian's Avatar
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    I do wonder - what would an INTx parent with an ESFJ kid look like?
    Tentative typing: ISFJ 6w5 or 9w1 (Sp/S[?]).

  8. #98
    Lay the coin on my tongue SilkRoad's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Viridian View Post
    I do wonder - what would an INTx parent with an ESFJ kid look like?
    Apparently not many people will admit to having an INTx parent at all. I'm pretty sure I have one, however. And I can occasionally be ESFJ-like. Or at least ExFJ-like. I think I was more like an INTJ as a kid (and maybe even up to 23-24) in large part because of my family's influence and because I've always been encouraged to hvae intellectual pursuits.
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  9. #99
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    Quote Originally Posted by SilkRoad View Post
    Apparently not many people will admit to having an INTx parent at all. I'm pretty sure I have one, however. And I can occasionally be ESFJ-like. Or at least ExFJ-like. I think I was more like an INTJ as a kid (and maybe even up to 23-24) in large part because of my family's influence and because I've always been encouraged to hvae intellectual pursuits.

    Hahah my dad is an INTP and we get along very well. I sometimes think that he's the person who gets me the most (except for my INFJ sister who can enter my mind whenever she feels like it. But I can too. ). My mom's an ENFJ..I feel that most of our conflicts are Fe/Fi related.

  10. #100
    Lay the coin on my tongue SilkRoad's Avatar
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    Hmm, maybe I should have said "hardly anyone will admit to having an NT mom." I just looked back through this entire thread where a lot of people volunteered what they think their mom's type is. Patches said hers is an ENTJ. I think mine is an INTJ (she has tested as such too). THere were no others!

    By extension: are all mothers really Feelers? I think one or two other people volunteered xSTJ moms, that was all.
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