Im an istp married to an esfj. I read somewhere that this is an ideal coupling (i also read that others are an ideal coupling too). Can you help let me know if you think I`m barking up the wrong tree with her here?
I wanted a relatinoship. When we're together, either we're always sitting, or driving around, or I get to be with her when she's watching TV, grading, or knitting. I don't do much with her at all, except what I can do by myself without being asked for attention every 15 minutes.
If I want to go anyplace, she usually finds a reason to cancel, or feels like sleeping instead. If her friends call, she's out the door. Without me. If I do happen to go, it's all nattering about things I'm not part of. What am I, another stuffed animal?
My role in this marriage seems to be to prop up her mental state, since she's always worrying about failing, and is prone to depressions. She seems to hate intimacy and sex. I love those things. We don't have any activities or interests in common after dating, other than both working at home. It's interminable, I don't think I'm able to support her day and night in every possible situation. How long can this continue?
She's very generous with me with food, gifts, thoughts, phone calls, which I love. Other than what is heavily weighing on my head, I really love her manner, friendliness, charm, ability to empathize, love, like noone I have ever know or even met.
Is this an ESFJ thing that is dooming me, or do I need something different? Help!!!