[ESFJ] Male ESFJs...

[The Ü™]

NFJs can also be pretty clingy.

 

[wildcat]

Okay, now I must propose a question. After all this talk about female ISTPs, who apparently behave like tomboys, does anyone know of any male ESFJs? If so, how do they behave?

(And I mean male ESFJs who are really ESFJs, not Nocturne. )

EDIT: This isn't a joke topic. I'm really interested in some perspective.

The Master of Ceremonies

Form Form Form
Substance never mattered
PR is everything
Protection: A friend of friends
Always talking to his cell phone, asking advice
what shall I do? what shall I do?
likes hunting
very poor reader
incompetent writer
jealous
sentimental
weeps a lot
drinks hard liqueur
sings with old cronies
ambitious
friendly
dresser
sly

 

[Mort Belfry]

I live with a male ESFJ (my guess only). He's gay though which I guess could have an impact on the "masculine" thing....though he is definitely pretty masculine in some ways. What would you like to know?

What would I like to know? His phone number and physical dimensions could be a start.

 

[Randomnity]

What would I like to know? His phone number and physical dimensions could be a start.

His phone number's my phone number.

His physical dimensions are: taller than me, heavier than me, and wider than me.

 

[alcea rosea]

I know two male ESFJ's. Other one is really strong J and other one is really strong Fe. They are both not at all femine but friendly, smiling, organizing, people-oriented and responsible people.

 

[theshadow]

My experience with male xSFJ's is that they are heavily influenced by the stereotypes of how a male should act, which contradicts their natural behavior This seems to make them put up a heavy front of masculinity... which tends to fade once they let you into their world.

But, if you are hanging out with anyone new, or in a situation they don't feel particularly comfortable with, you see this over-masculine front come back. This could be just the selective sample of young male xSFJ's in my life, but I have have definitely noticed this trend to exist.

getting to know me is very similar. in fact all my closest friends are women just for this reason

Fe is a real pain sometimes

my best male friend is an ESFJ

 

[luridlemur]

I know one. He's really into classic rock and treating women like objects.

 

[lazyhappy]

i only met a female one but according to thde esfj portriat they are supposed to be very "manly" and are football players and such... but are still traditional, boring people

 

[nightning]

Male ESFJs always seem to play up the male stereotype to extreme degrees- the flittering philanderer- the sexual machismo etc. They have a good sense of humor and have a sensitive side they only display towards women, but around men, they're pretty competitive.

I wouldn't call them philanderers... but the two male ESFJs I know of do play up on the machismo thing... The younger one is competitive when dealing with males, but a total pushover when it comes to females... The other one works in the same lab as I (same age). The competitiveness is less extreme, but he does throw compliments towards women more than to my liking.

I've noticed that, actually...aggression and confidence/hostility/bravado, but to the people they care about they're all cuddly and sickeningly clingy.

+1

Actually now that I think of it, the female ESFJ I know has the cuddly part but not the aggressive part...so maybe stereotypes can be a factor.

How Si deals with gender roles I suppose... certain standards they have to live up to.

 

[theshadow]

I wouldn't call them philanderers... but the two male ESFJs I know of do play up on the machismo thing... The younger one is competitive when dealing with males, but a total pushover when it comes to females... The other one works in the same lab as I (same age). The competitiveness is less extreme, but he does throw compliments towards women more than to my liking.

my friend is very much like this.he no longer competes with me though.

 

[pure_mercury]

I am a 25-year-old straight male ESFJ. I would say a lot of the typing is true, at least for me. I am a more gregarious, outgoing type and I like to have a good time with lots of people around. I also like to meet new women, and like to think of myself as the charming type (a jerk ESFJ male would probably be a major philanderer). I am a pretty forward-looking type, but I do like rather feminine women. I am a fairly emotional and heart-on-the-sleeve type, though, and I am into art and film (Film major, Business minor at university). I have a pretty masculine, stocky, muscular body type, but I have a bit of a baby face and blue eyes (when clean-shaven, I am constantly ID'ed when going out). I can also be quite stubborn, and hate to be wrong. ESFJ all the way.

 

[pure_mercury]

Oh, and I am the rare male who remembers EVERYTHING. This is both good (birthdays and anniversaries) and bad (arguments with females).

 

[Colors]

Welcome. Start a new thread in the Welcomes and Introductions section?

There are not a lot of ESFJ males around here.

 

[pure_mercury]

Welcome. Start a new thread in the Welcomes and Introductions section?

There are not a lot of ESFJ males around here.

Oh, OK. I actually just joined. I took an MBTI a long time ago, but I did a search online and this was one of the links. I was interested because I've read that ESFJs make up a good portion of the population, but are like 2-to-1 female. I will do that.

 

[Mort Belfry]

I am a 25-year-old straight male ESFJ.

Interesting that you had to mention that you're straight.

Do you assume that if you said you're just a male ESFJ, that people would assume the opposite?

 

[pure_mercury]

Interesting that you had to mention that you're straight.

Do you assume that if you said you're just a male ESFJ, that people would assume the opposite?

Well, I did ask for dating advice in another thread, and I felt it necessary there. But the more I read, the more it seems that "straight" would be a good thing to add for informational purposes. I am not a particularly feminine type, but I have had people ask me about my orientation in the past. I assume it's because I am a fastidious dresser, am involved in the arts, etc. Old stereotypes, to be sure. I am white, as well (Irish/Italian). Shouldn't matter to people, really.

 

[rhinosaur]

I know a (suspected) male ESFJ. He's very nice to me, actually remembers my name, and our previous conversations. Nice to talk to. He is a little soft-spoken but is always lucid, concise, and on-point. Doesn't make jokes or get too excited about stuff. That's about all I can say, cause I don't know him that well.

 

[runvardh]

Interesting that you had to mention that you're straight.

Do you assume that if you said you're just a male ESFJ, that people would assume the opposite?

It's an assumption many of us F males have to make about how we are precevied, or at least this is something I've had to be mindful of. I've found that many people wonder if I'm gay mostly because of the way I communicate even when I'm drooling over the blonde bomshell sitting beside me.

 

[pure_mercury]

It's an assumption many of us F males have to make about how we are precevied, or at least this is something I've had to be mindful of. I've found that many people wonder if I'm gay mostly because of the way I communicate even when I'm drooling over the blonde bomshell sitting beside me.

I know that feeling. And I am also prone to saying things like "I'm off to the Britpop dance party!" and I am, right now. Have a good night, everyone. Thanks for the hearty welcome today.

 

[runvardh]

Actually, I should add a side note that hetero men who are seen as homo end up not getting any and for an sx variant like me it FUCKING SUCKS in a very bad way.