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[ESFJ] ESFJ Hate Thread

Saslou

New member
Joined
Feb 1, 2009
Messages
4,910
MBTI Type
ESFJ
I know we can come across as

Assertive which is misinterpreted as bossy

Honest and direct which is misinterpreted as rude/critical

Angry issues .. But that's just momentarily ;)

Just as with the rest of the types .. We have a lot of love to give.

So although i have yet to hear any real criticism of ESFJ's from this thread .. Just bear in mind that all types can be healthy/unhealthy so don't take it personally if someone attacks/criticises you for they are struggling just like everyone else with their own personal demons.

Judge everyone as an individual as opposed to a particular type



Free hugs, bunnies and rainbows to everyone contribution to this thread


YouTube - ELO - Mr.Blue Sky (Original Promo)
 

Craft

Probably Most Brilliant
Joined
Jan 8, 2010
Messages
1,221
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
5w7
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
Well, I hate everyone. _I_ (>.>)





I kid. Where did you get this "hate ESFJ" idea?
 

CrystalViolet

lab rat extraordinaire
Joined
Oct 24, 2008
Messages
2,152
MBTI Type
XNFP
Enneagram
5w4
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
You guys can nag like no-one else....but I get upset when other people get upset. I know you only do it because you worry. I know you don't understand me, so you try to fix me, and I know you don't always mean it when you say I'm a space cadet.
You are always there when you are needed, but You get frustrated because you don't understand exactly what I need. We have massive miscommunications because I don't exactly understand you either, but I don't hate ya. You're the ones, that know every one and who to talk too when you need some thing done. You're ones that break ice for me when I need to get some thing done. You're always positive, even when I'm not.
You are tend to be strong when I'm not, you make life look easy when it's hard for me.
So mostly it's because I'm jealous, but I don't hate ya.
 

Moiety

New member
Joined
Aug 3, 2008
Messages
5,996
MBTI Type
ISFJ
ESFJs are tolerable if they are not very bossy, but I find them of little personal interest most of the time, really. They are kind boring.
 

stringstheory

THIS bitch
Joined
Jul 12, 2009
Messages
923
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
1
i love my ESFJ friend. Her openness and her honesty are very refreshing especially since i know it's always for good, not in order to be critical. Her Ne is also really well developed so we ALWAYS have fun things to talk about and we can usually relate on having some really out of the box ideas. she really gets me on that level, and will often become very enthusiastic about my shiny new interest, which she knows makes me feel good. She is VERY loyal to her friends and believes they don't deserve anything but the best things in life.

however her anger can scare me sometimes but it never lasts long. her values and the consequent actions are sometimes really, uh, questionable to me, and it's a bit scary at times how good she is at justifying them; logical, even.

Of course not all the time, but even if not she has a hard time understanding why I or others would want to do things outside of "what's best". she will sometimes operate with an "it'll be ok, i know you'll figure it out" attitude when discussing such things.

i can't do much else other than roll my eyes though, because it stems from her belief that I should have the very best in her eyes. And it's really not that big of a deal anyways.

overall: keep on truckin' guys :nice:
 

countrygirl

New member
Joined
Jan 7, 2009
Messages
722
MBTI Type
ISFJ
I believe my mother was an ESFJ unfortunately not a healthy one even though she loved me and did her best for me.

My eldest daughter is probably an ESFJ and I don't know how to handle her Fe. It is overwhelming for me. With maturity it'll get better but hopefully I don't hamper her zest for life in the process.

I also have two ESFJ sister-in-laws and my mother-in-law who's company I enjoy in small doses. They love to entertain and know how to have fun.

My mother-in-law excells with babies. I learned so much from her but did not allow her to do everything because that was not the relationship I wanted her to have with her grandkids.
 
R

Riva

Guest
The ESFJ hate thread!

It's absolutely shocking how how much hate filled comments get thrown at esfj in most mbti forums. And from what I have noticed most of these remarks are made by NFs. So lets not be vague, lets not hold anything back. Let us in this thread recollect everything little by littie that make them the most hated type.ESFJs the Scum of mbti? @madmins - if there is a similar thread please merge this.
 
R

Riva

Guest
My experience -
I recall only two esfjs that i've come across. One is a 35 year old male - who i'm not exactly sure whether is an esfj or estj - is quite an unhealthy individual. Since i'm not entirely sure what his type is - in my defense he gives extreme sissy/gay vibes which makes it hard to type him - I will not elaborate on what makes him irritable.

The other esfj I know is a girl - same age - whose type I was sure before I gave the test. Nonetheless I gave her the test anyway and she got esfj as the result. What can I say about her? She is a sweetheart. She throws surprise bday parties, visits people when they are sick, goes to great extents to help people, reminds people of their friends bdays (yes that was about me), stands up against injustices, etc. Overall she is helpful, kind, social.

/Killed own thread?
 

Giggly

No moss growing on me
Joined
Jun 12, 2008
Messages
9,661
MBTI Type
iSFj
Enneagram
2
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
Well, sometimes they do suck.

But not all of them and not all of the time!!
 
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Riva

Guest
*looks down*

There is a similar thread. [MENTION=9273]Vasilisa[/MENTION] I believe you are online. Please merge this threa with the other and please let us know of the progress you have made in,recording that song I requested you to sing. ;)
 

Siúil a Rúin

when the colors fade
Joined
Apr 23, 2007
Messages
14,037
MBTI Type
ISFP
Enneagram
496
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
I have some frustration and even prejudice towards ESTJ or some ENTJs that are too externally aggressive, but not a problem with ESFJs. I can't entirely guarantee it is ETJs I dislike, but the times people have yelled at me or attacked me and I tried to figure out their type, that is what I could come up with. Who knows, maybe they were INFPs in disguise. :shrug:

The person I can call my best friend and colleague is probably ESFJ and she is incredibly sweet and balanced. She is very good with children, excellent at drawing healthy boundaries with people, and aware of external needs of people. I'm planning on trying to get closer to her because I can tell she needs a real friend in her life
 

RaptorWizard

Permabanned
Joined
Mar 19, 2012
Messages
5,895
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
5w6
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
ESFJs are weak and pathetic insects who serve the hive and its overly powerful overlords as they are and will ever remain continually trapped in the matrix while INTPs destroy this pathetic world in order to recreate it anew in a perfected state hence making INTPs the Grand Architects of Creation!
:einstein2:
 
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Riva

Guest
ESFJs are weak and pathetic insects who serve the hive and its overly powerful overlords as they are and will ever remain continually trapped in the matrix while INTPs destroy this pathetic world in order to recreate it anew in a perfected state hence making INTPs the Grand Architects of Creation!
:einstein2:

It's the otherway around kid. Sorry to be the one to point this out to you.

Though INTPs might not serve the hive probably for not wanting to and not having the ability to do so.

ESFJs > INTPs when it comes to being grand architects of creation. Take a look around. The backbone of almost all (if not all) cultures are based on ESFJ values or are either trumped by ESFJs.

Add to it - INTPs are not known for their creation (not creative) traits.
 

Winds of Thor

New member
Joined
Jan 11, 2009
Messages
1,842
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
3w4
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
I really like most ESFJs :D.
One is a friend of mine and loads of laughs. She has an amazing spirit, is great fun, also will stand and defend me if someone picks on me (not that I need that or anything but it's nice). Also a cheerleader (Go Tampa Bay!) and has loads of outward confidence and is easy to hang out with. :)
 

Swiko

New member
Joined
Sep 26, 2012
Messages
44
MBTI Type
ISFJ
Enneagram
6w5
Instinctual Variant
sp
I have never actually met an ESFJ (that I am aware of).
 

Betty Blue

Let me count the ways
Joined
Jan 19, 2010
Messages
5,063
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
7W6
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
I know three that i can think of. Two are close friends, one of them a very very close friend.

She is an absolute angel, very well rounded and caring. Super organised and considerate. She can also really let her hair down on the odd occaision that we syncronise an evening out. I know she will be in my life for many years to come and look forward to us reliving our younger days by a country fireside when we are old and grey.

I am in awe of her awesomness. :wubbie:
 

Nicki

Retired
Joined
Jun 26, 2010
Messages
1,505
ESFJs are like that southern old lady who offers people both common sense and freshly baked cookies on a day to day basis.
 
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