Interesting. My Grandma was an ESFJ also, speaking of being related to that type. I always got along great with her actually; it was my Mom (also an INFJ) who she drove nuts sometimes. I could understand it though; and people usually have trouble with parents of the same gender somewhere along the line, probably regardless of type. My Grandma grew up in a huge family, of about 12 kids. So being introverted wasn't something she could understand.
Also, my aunt is an ESFJ as well. I get along fine with her too.
I can think of two ESFJs, one male and one female, that I don't get along with. In the case of the male one, I never said or did anything to him, but seeing his reactions to my behavior, I could just tell that my very existence seemed to make his skin crawl. I felt bad that he had this reaction to me, but I felt like, hey, I can only be myself...If you don't like me even though I haven't bothered you, it's your problem.
Keep in mind the people I'm talking about are not particularly healthy people. The guy I just mentioned has alienated most of his friends because he feels people should be treating him better than they are and constantly whines about it, day after day. Eventually people get sick of hearing about it.
Likewise, the INFJs you mentioned don't seem healthy either. Most INFJs probably don't go around giving un-asked for advice (sounds like something an unhealthy ENFJ would do) and I don't think any healthy INFJ should have a problem admitting they're wrong about something if they are indeed wrong (unless it means they're giving up on a cause or something).
Also, with ESFJs being among the most common type, there's just going to be more of them who are jerks. With there being probably over 10 ESFJs to every 1 INFJ, it doesn't mean INFJs are on average any better, there's just way more ESFJs.
I've always been totally opposed to judging people because they were different or strange to me. I'm not saying all ESFJs do this. Just certain unhealthy ones. The good ESFJs are like angels. In fact, I mainly feel self-conscious around them because they give and give and I feel like I might be unable to return the favor!
But I wonder if other INFJs have ever felt that others judge them and write them off without really getting to know them? I had this problem sometimes...Especially when I was younger, but you know how kids can be. I dunno...thoughts?
But I do think we have a tendency to make you ESFJs uncomfortable. And I've always felt bad about that.