Thread: How to get along with ESTJ's
12-29-2010, 01:32 PM #41
12-29-2010, 02:34 PM #42
I am prejudiced against them...and generally find their values conflict with mine
....but despite this these are one of the types whom I just happen to end up hanging out with comparatively a lot. I am at a loss on why. It seems like if you, albeit hesitantly, live up to the challenge of putting up with them then they will match your play.
Also a lot of stuff they say makes me crack up although I am at a loss if they are trying to be funny or no.
12-29-2010, 02:39 PM #43
12-29-2010, 02:50 PM #44
12-29-2010, 04:08 PM #45
I get along pretty with my ESTJ boss but then we have a very simple relationship: He tells me to do something, and I do it. If I don't think I can do it, I explain to him why and he either gets me backup to get the job done or assigns it to someone else.
Usually though he seems to prefer me. He's not very showy about it, but I can tell that he respects me. The only time we ever butt-heads is when my perfectionism hits an area of the job he feels is unimportant. I'll just shrug my shoulders and do what he tells me to do but secretly hate the fact that this one little area that he's deemed insignificant looks like crap.
Which I realize sounds incredibly stupid but the thing is that I take personal pride in some of the work I do and when something doesn't look good to me...it's like nails on a chalk board, I CAN'T ignore it.
He'll also get these grand ideas or projects into his head and go all gung-ho on getting them done. Which is all well and fine, but sometimes I think he's wasting his time. "Overachiever" is how I think of most ESTJs.
Aside from those two very minor nitpicks, we get along extremely well. He's got a great sense of humor and watching him bicker with some of the SPs I work with is hilarious!
Good folks they are"There is no such thing as spare time, no such thing as down time, no such thing as free time, there is only life time. Go."
― Henry Rollins
12-29-2010, 06:52 PM #46
What if an ESTJ goes into avoidance mode? The one I know is afraid of anything uncomfortable (not in touch with Fi) and when wrong will give the silent treatment. Any experiences with a conflict avoidant ESTJ?~Live and learn from fools and from sages~
Shameless Self-Promotion:MDP2525's Den and the Start of Motorcycle Maintenance
12-29-2010, 07:16 PM #47
12-30-2010, 03:45 AM #48
Regarding the "silent treatment"... this could be from me being an enneagram 1 (is your ESTJ a 1?), but when I give that kind of silent treatment, it's usually because I really really want to say something but I'm afraid that I'll offend someone. But if someone asks me what I think: BOOM! Out come my uncensored opinion. And I don't mean that in a bad way; I often wish that people would do that, because it gives me an excuse to be blunt without feeling guilty, and when all parties can safely be blunt, that makes for better and more fruitful discussion, imho.
So I guess... the best way to deal with a conflict-avoidant ESTJ would be to take the risk of conflict away? i.e. show them that no one will be hurt or offended or reactive if they state their full opinion? Make it a conversation and not an argument?
I dunno. I'm thinking out loud. I have no idea if this post is even coherent. It's too late at night for this...Originally Posted by Nørrsken impersonating EJCC
1w2/7w6/3w4 so/sx (enneagram)
lawful good (D&D) / ravenclaw + wampus (HP) / boros legion (M:TG)
conscientious > sensitive > serious (oldham)
want to ask me something? go for it!
12-30-2010, 01:05 PM #49ENTj 7-3-8 sx/sp
12-30-2010, 01:09 PM #50
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