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  1. #201
    Senior Member Warm's Avatar
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    It's time for more ISFJ attention. Give it to us!!!
    "Your voice is like chocolate...dreamy."
    --WildHorses

  2. #202
    Senior Member tinker683's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Warm View Post
    It's time for more ISFJ attention. Give it to us!!!
    WARMIE-CHAN!

    Where have you been sweetie?
    "The man who is swimming against the stream knows the strength of it."
    ― Woodrow Wilson

  3. #203
    Senior Member DJAchtundvierzig's Avatar
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    I was wondering if you could possibly answer this question? http://www.typologycentral.com/forum...likes-you.html

  4. #204
    No moss growing on me Giggly's Avatar
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    ^ Uhh. Hmm. They'll be kind of bashful and giggly and say stupid stuff when they talk to you. Maybe overly complimentary, or on the other extreme, they may try to deliberately avoid you if they think they have no chance with you. The usual things, I guess.

  5. #205
    Senior Member Warm's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by tinker683 View Post
    WARMIE-CHAN!

    Where have you been sweetie?
    I'm here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    "Your voice is like chocolate...dreamy."
    --WildHorses

  6. #206
    this is my winter song EJCC's Avatar
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    I have a question.

    Every time I've made friends with an ISFJ, there's been a roadblock, and we get to this obvious point where I could either be their close friend or just a friend. Inevitably, I fail the ISFJ's internal test of close friendship worthiness, and the ISFJ keeps me at arms length (while still being my friend), but very very obviously choosing their close friends over me.

    I mean, I know that ISFJs are very loyal to their closer friends. It wouldn't surprise me if they saw friends in a hierarchy, from close friends to friendly acquaintances, and give only the very closest friends any sort of priority (because sometimes I do the same thing), but I would like to think that they would still give new friends a chance. So, ruling out the possibility that these situations have been inherently my fault (i.e. assuming that I didn't do something bad to convince these ISFJs that I'm not good friend material), I have no idea what's causing this.

    So, my question is: What could a person do to become an ISFJ's close friend? Would it be required that a new friend join the ISFJ's pre-existing friend group, before trying to befriend them? In other words, is it always this difficult, or is it just me??
    ~ g e t f e s t i v e ! ~


    EJCC: "The Big Questions in my life right now: 1) What am I willing to live with? 2) What do I have to live with? 3) What can I change for the better?"
    Coriolis: "Is that the ESTJ Serenity Prayer?"



    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
    1w2/7w6/3w4 so/sx (enneagram)
    want to ask me something? go for it!

  7. #207
    resonance entropie's Avatar
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    Woaah that was complicated, I think my left eye will stick in that complicated position it took on after reading that

    Is that normal ? ISFJ inner, outer and half-inner circle of friends ? Does that explain the existance of scientology ?
    [URL]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tEBvftJUwDw&t=0s[/URL]

  8. #208
    Riva
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    One of my closest friends is a ISFJ. Strangely he tolerates me quite a lot. And there is a ISFJ girl (pretty pretty), that I keep on hitting on. (She's worth hitting on, believe me.) Again she tolerates me quite a lot. Does it have anything to do with their tolerant nature or do they have a special place in their hearts for me.

    The girl I mentioned, was mentioned in jest.

  9. #209
    No moss growing on me Giggly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    I have a question.

    Every time I've made friends with an ISFJ, there's been a roadblock, and we get to this obvious point where I could either be their close friend or just a friend. Inevitably, I fail the ISFJ's internal test of close friendship worthiness, and the ISFJ keeps me at arms length (while still being my friend), but very very obviously choosing their close friends over me.

    I mean, I know that ISFJs are very loyal to their closer friends. It wouldn't surprise me if they saw friends in a hierarchy, from close friends to friendly acquaintances, and give only the very closest friends any sort of priority (because sometimes I do the same thing), but I would like to think that they would still give new friends a chance. So, ruling out the possibility that these situations have been inherently my fault (i.e. assuming that I didn't do something bad to convince these ISFJs that I'm not good friend material), I have no idea what's causing this.

    So, my question is: What could a person do to become an ISFJ's close friend? Would it be required that a new friend join the ISFJ's pre-existing friend group, before trying to befriend them? In other words, is it always this difficult, or is it just me??
    Hmm, I don't think it's difficult. Perhaps they think you are disinterested? I have a strong desire to be close with people but I won't push it if the other persons interest is hard to gauge, or if they seem threatening in some way. And yes it's true that ISFJs unconsciously have favorites.

    As for what to do, I'd say just spend more time with the ISFJ and be open, genuine and sincere. Have you tried to invite her over or to go some place together with you? Maybe a shared interest or activity you have? Sometimes doing things together and talking while you do them can help to build that bridge that you need in order to open up to each other, so long as you don't use the activity as a means to distract you from having to talk.

    Quote Originally Posted by Riva View Post
    One of my closest friends is a ISFJ. Strangely he tolerates me quite a lot. And there is a ISFJ girl (pretty pretty), that I keep on hitting on. (She's worth hitting on, believe me.) Again she tolerates me quite a lot. Does it have anything to do with their tolerant nature or do they have a special place in their hearts for me.
    In those cases, I think so.

  10. #210
    this is my winter song EJCC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Giggly View Post
    Hmm, I don't think it's difficult. Perhaps they think you are disinterested? I have a strong desire to be close with people but I won't push it if the other persons interest is hard to gauge, or if they seem threatening in some way. And yes it's true that ISFJs unconsciously have favorites.

    As for what to do, I'd say just spend more time with the ISFJ and be open, genuine and sincere. Have you tried to invite her over or to go some place together with you? Maybe a shared interest or activity you have? Sometimes doing things together and talking while you do them can help to build that bridge that you need in order to open up to each other, so long as you don't use the activity as a means to distract you from having to talk.
    This is an instance where I wish I had more Fe than I do. Because I really can't figure this girl out right now. Here's the full story:

    We met through a mutual friend. We had a class together. We would write snarky notes about the course material during class, and giggle about them. We were in an increasingly large friend group. She was goofy and loved to laugh and I was CONVINCED that she was an extrovert. But as the group got bigger, and as the semester got more stressful, it seems like she abruptly shut half the group out of her life. She would almost never return people's texts unless they were part of this new, smaller friend circle, and she would act comparatively disinterested in everyone else. (Or, at least, to me. Or maybe she was just acting more like an introvert.) When she got the most stressed out, i.e. the week before finals week, she didn't even sit next to me in class (this was the first time she had done that), and she only said a few words to me. And my usual method of communicating with her stopped working, because I expected a certain dynamic from her in return that I didn't get. Suddenly she was this different person who I was completely unprepared to deal with.

    Now, in spring semester, she's still with the smaller group, and still not really returning anyone's texts. She's gotten a reputation from everyone in the broader friend group but outside of the smaller group, as being flaky. And nothing's really been the same.

    Frankly, I'm confused. :confused: Do any of you ISFJs (or people who know a lot about ISFJs) have insight into the situation?
    ~ g e t f e s t i v e ! ~


    EJCC: "The Big Questions in my life right now: 1) What am I willing to live with? 2) What do I have to live with? 3) What can I change for the better?"
    Coriolis: "Is that the ESTJ Serenity Prayer?"



    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
    1w2/7w6/3w4 so/sx (enneagram)
    want to ask me something? go for it!

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