[SJ] what SJ's look for in a potential mate

[GirlAmerica]

Define the following characteristics-

Physical:

Emotional:

Mental:

 

[hotmale]

Physical: Someone who takes care of her body, eats well, exercises and on the more stylish side

Emotional: Expressive, open and warm, not controlling and manipulative

Mental: Easy-going, adaptable (a girl who can blend into any environment) generous and thoughtful, adventurous and ambitious.

 

[swordpath]

I pretty much think me and hotmale could be found fighting over the same girl.

 

[Recoleta]

Physical: I prefer more clean-cut guys. I'm not a big fan of facial hair, but it's not like a deal-breaker or anything. Hair can be cut short or shaggy, it just depends on the guy. I suppose I'm attracted to the more casual or outdoorsy type. Actually, I'm usually very attracted to guys that are knowlegable about mechanics and/or can build things.

Emotional: They have to be emotionally stable and reasonably independent. I like to be needed and appreciated, but I don't want someone overly clingy. I like men who are emotionally strong, but know how to open up when it's appropriate. They should be fun, light-hearted, and able to bring out my fun and adventurous side. They should also be honest and open and have moral values.

Mental: Ideally they're roughly the same intelligence as me. They should have some sort of goals and self-motivation. It doesn't really matter to me what their area of study is, so long as they enjoy what they do.

 

[alicia91]

Physical: Clean-cut, professional type. When I was younger I liked a preppy type.

Emotional: I prefer guys who are good at communicating their emotions in a controlled way. No drama kings, high-strung, clingy, or sappy types please.

Mental: Hard to say - I kind of know it when I see it. I like men who are educated, ambitious and also practical (can fix things, plant a tree etc.). Also men who are nice to children and animals.

 

[lecky]

Physical: I prefer him to be clean cut, no tattoos, on the taller side. I don't mind a little scruff on the face (can be sexy). I like the rugged look as well...

Emotional: I really need him to be understanding of my need for space sometimes, I can't stand clinginess but at the same time I can't deal with too much aloofness. I prefer someone who is warm and understanding and will make me feel safe to come out of my shell (this is so hard to find!). I also enjoy compliments He has to be loyal/faithful/trustworthy!

Mental: I prefer for him to have the same or greater educational background than myself. I would like for him to be interested in world affairs and politics. I seem to be most attracted to extroverts b/c those are the ones who are most successful at seeking me out. I've been told I come across as unapproachable and aloof.

 

[Hirsch63]

Physical: Full and expressive facial features. Body shape is not that important, but hygiene is...Clothes are more of an unconcious thing but something unique either in color or texture is engaging. The Eyes have it....
Someone who takes advantage of living now, getting needed health care and enjoying whole foods. They don't have to be a gym-rat or a couch potato...a body that reflects living a full, meaningful life to the person themselves. I guess height isn't important but I sure like someone I can wrap my arms around and smell their hair.

Emotional: Stable, calm. Sentimental. No explosive drama, in fact no drama.
Affectionate. Straight-forward and confident in thier beliefs. Soft spot for animals.

Mental: Well-grounded in common sense. Artistically expressive. Challenging, but fair. Considerate and discrete. Spiritual attributes and tolerance, no zealotry. Objective and inquisitive. Wry.

And all of this of course in a well integrated human. When the physicality is a real reflection of the emotions and the behaviour a reflection of the mental state so that there is a wholistic consistency in there presence an undeniable power of spirit. This strength of spirit could be manifest very subtly (with underlying intensity) or very expressively by a rich (in terms of quality, not $$) presence.

Gosh it kind of looks like a grocery list...well, It's a snapshot. Hope it is helpful.

 

[ThatsWhatHeSaid]

I'm gonna answer based on my ex-gf, who was ISTJ to the max and my dad.

Physically: Good looking, good posture, well-respected/commanding.

Emotionally: Someone who makes them feel secure and doesn't judge them for not having real feelings (ha! kidding.); actually though, I think this is true of all women, not just SJs.

Intellectually: Someone to put them in their place, who's abstract enough to toy with the bigger picture but not so much that he loses interest in the SJ's sensory-life. Humor is a big part of this.

Spiritually: See "Emotionally." The heavy SJs that I know don't really mess with spirituality.

 

[FDG]

I'm gonna answer based on my ex-gf, who was ISTJ to the max and my dad.

Physically: Good looking, good posture, well-respected/commanding.

Emotionally: Someone who makes them feel secure and doesn't judge them for not having real feelings (ha! kidding.); actually though, I think this is true of all women, not just SJs.

Intellectually: Someone to put them in their place, who's abstract enough to toy with the bigger picture but not so much that he loses interest in the SJ's sensory-life. Humor is a big part of this.

Spiritually: See "Emotionally." The heavy SJs that I know don't really mess with spirituality.

That's what I've generally seen around too.

 

[Habba]

No reason to let this thread die, we like digging the past, don't we now?.

Physical: Not too tall, brown-reddish hair, freckles, cute smile. None, or very little make-up and a friendly face. Weight or body measures aren't important, as long as she's smaller than me. Uses cute clothings rather than trendy ones. No heels. Wool and bright colors are good.

Emotional: Stable and warm. Constantly spreading good feelings to people around. I do like good drama, but not in my woman.

Mental: Dreamy and off-the-ground. Good imagination is hot. And one should be smart enough to understand my wittiness. It's sad if my great witty remarks are not understood.

Ermm... isn't that kinda like an.. you know... ENFPs?

 

[d@v3]

No reason to let this thread die, we like digging the past, don't we now?.

Physical: Not too tall, brown-reddish hair, freckles, cute smile. None, or very little make-up and a friendly face. Weight or body measures aren't important, as long as she's smaller than me. Uses cute clothings rather than trendy ones. No heels. Wool and bright colors are good.

Emotional: Stable and warm. Constantly spreading good feelings to people around. I do like good drama, but not in my woman.

Mental: Dreamy and off-the-ground. Good imagination is hot. And one should be smart enough to understand my wittiness. It's sad if my great witty remarks are not understood.

Ermm... isn't that kinda like an.. you know... ENFPs?

I agree with Habba to an extent.

Physical: A soft voice, warm voice. Shorter than me. A girl who takes care of her body, but not one who obsesses over it. Body weight doesn't matter, NOT too skinny! Average would be nice!

Emotional: She needs to be "sweet" . She needs to be able to tell when it is appropriate to be affectionate and when to be lady-like. She needs to be expressive ( and make her expressions obvious to me) but also be a little mysterious, as to keep me guessing!

Mental: Obviously she needs to be mentally stable.... of couse.. who knows what the standards of that is today! Patient, Kind, and same moral values. AND of course she has to have a sense of humor.

Additionally, I would like my girl to enjoy nature and the outdoors [I'm an outdoorsman] and not be afraid to hold a gun. (As long as it's not pointed at me!] A girl who can pull me out of the "ruts" and military-like routines that I get myself into and just take me out to have fun and be adventurous!

Sounds like an ENFP to me!

 

[Habba]

Additionally, I would like my girl to enjoy nature and the outdoors [I'm an outdoorsman] and not be afraid to hold a gun. (As long as it's not pointed at me!] A girl who can pull me out of the "ruts" and military-like routines that I get myself into and just take me out to have fun and be adventurous!

Sounds like an ENFP to me!

An ENFP with a gun?! "Make love and war!"

 

[d@v3]

An ENFP with a gun?! "Make love and war!"

Good point Habba. On second thought, I'll make sure the gun is empty.

Can you imagine Amargith with a gun?!

 

[raz]

I'm not really sure about this yet. I've tried to set rules on it, but then girls come along through my life that don't follow those rules and manage to obtain a deep connection with me. However, one thing that came to mind earlier when I was talking to an old friend of mine, is the ability to talk about *anything*.

I have a friend that I met about 9 years ago-ish. We've still kept in touch, and the one thing that intrigues me the most about her is that I can talk to her about anything at all, and I don't have to worry about any games. It's just straight up honesty. I mean, even tonight, I was talking to her, and during the conversation we talked about the two of us dating each other, and at the same time I talked to her about other girls I was interested in. Given we haven't "dated" but that level of openness just makes me hold her in extremely high regard. Maybe it's just the friendship that's caused that.

 

[PeaceBaby]

Well gents, looks like you are looking for an INFP or an ENFP ... sorry I'm taken, but there are likely a few lovely candidates abounding here!

P.S. my hubby is an ESTJ!

 

[d@v3]

Well gents, looks like you are looking for an INFP or an ENFP ... sorry I'm taken, but there are likely a few lovely candidates abounding here!

P.S. my hubby is an ESTJ!

It seems like they are ALWAYS taken.

 

[Costrin]

Interestingly, my ISTJ friend is going out with an ENFP.

 

[earthangel]

Physical: It doesn't really matter to me, as long as their personality is compatible. Taller than me (i'm a lady), not morbidly obese. Clean. Unique in fashion, or just not embarrassing, lol. OH! ~ Incredibly sexually competent, puhlease hehe

Emotional: Warm, appreciative, sweet. Affectionate, understanding. Monogamous, committed.

Mental: Confident, calm. Stable. Intelligent. Witty, clever.

 

[d@v3]

Interestingly, my ISTJ friend is going out with an ENFP.

Thanks for rubbing it in.

 

[d@v3]

Physical: It doesn't really matter to me, as long as their personality is compatible. Taller than me (i'm a lady), not morbidly obese. Clean. Unique in fashion, or just not embarrassing, lol. OH! ~ Incredibly sexually competent, puhlease hehe

Emotional: Warm, appreciative, sweet. Affectionate, understanding. Monogamous, committed.

Mental: Confident, calm. Stable. Intelligent. Witty, clever.

She's lookin for an ISTJ! oh, wait... nevermind... witty? clever? FALSE ALARM!