[ISTJ] Any ISTJ females around?

[sticker]

(I hate myself for not being able to stop myself from posting walls of texts.)

Halp, I can't relate to half of the things mentioned in ISTJ and ESTJ profiles all over the net. They seem to be full of pragmatic businessmen stereotypes... I used to think that I was an INTP because of how unsimilar I am to those profiles (ISTP is out of the question because I'm quite sure I use Ne and Si), but felt out of place on one of the INTP forums. I came on here, started a thread on 'what is my type' and most voted for ISTJ, followed by ESTJ. Are there any profiles of ISTJ that focuses more on usage of functions rather than on habits and excelling in family/business matters?

I can't imagine myself being attracted to a guy, then get settled, start a family. My plan in life (or at least what I think the ideal life is) is to get a stable job with minimal human contact (hopefully one of my interest), then live alone or with a cat or something. I don't mind starting a family, but I won't fret over it if I don't.

Unlike how the forum says that Ns are usually the ones that do not fit in society, I think that applies to me rather well too. I couldn't find common interest amongst girls, can't fathom fashion (needed a friend to explain to me what spaghetti stripes were just last week), did not find cliques appealing, never wore make up. I'm pretty androgynous or tomboyish to some people. I was a loner from Primary all the way to Secondary school (both of which were girls' schools, things got slightly better in Polytechnic with so many people sharing similar interests), never had interest in pursuing academic achievements, sleep in class right in front of the teachers' noses... After Secondary school, I chose to take up diploma dealing with games design in a Polytechnic over a Junior College with an irrational goal of working as an artist in Neopets. Well, at least, I finally found more friends with similar interests but it was a 180 degrees turn from me being a troublemaker in class to one of the least playful people in the course. (Is it possible that the course attracted way more N people than the general population represents?) Amongst book-smart people, I'm the laid back slacker. Amongst laid back slackers, I'm the one being stressed over handing up decent homework.

There are plenty of things that makes me think I'm a P. My table's messy, I don't keep a list, I don't sleep and wake up at the same time eveyday. Telling me to plan is like telling me to kill a kitty. Well, not that bad but you get what I mean. I dislike doing stuff and I prefer to sit on them and brood about things and be the one asking questions, not the one giving answers. I attempted keeping a calendar on my table, but it ended up being unused. Resolutions I make are usually forgotten or I end up not being able to commit to it. Example will be DDRing on a dancemat at home as a replacement for exercise because I do not enjoy wasting time going out. It worked well for a week, but then I started waking up late again so I ended up using the time to do homework or surf the net.

I also seem to be more expressive than most ISTJs (wonder if it's partially due to gender differences and because my mum is a short-tempered ESFJ) I relate more with my ENFP sister than my ISTJ dad but I'm not sure if it's because of a generation gap. There were many times, where I would be moved to tears (or near) by a touching movie/show. I have never cried in front of my friends before (at least as far as I remember...). Likewise, none of my friends (who I care about) ever did, which is a relief because I have no idea how I'm supposed to react. Maybe stiffly offer a packet of tissue or something. But I will definitely not hug or pat them. Same thing happens when friends online emo at me. I usually find myself unsure of what to say, and end up saying "Well, I do not know what to say but feel free to rant and I'll be listening." Unless I think the other person's being a crybaby, I'll roll my eyes and just go "hm", "ok", maybe a few impersonal suggestions.

The things that makes me do think that I'm an ISTJ (tentatively) is that I'm bent on security, intolerant of my younger brother's Se-ness (Making noise, playing with loud toys, role playing as some action hero shooting imaginary bullets at me, drives me up the wall), anal about the kind of homework I hand up. I'm the party pooper, I douse people with a bucket of cold reality water. (I can't help it! How are people able to stay stuck in irrational fantasies?) I don't mind following a timetable and I prefer my lecturers giving me deadlines and requirements of the homework set in stone. There were incidents where my HTI (History and Theory of Ideas, it's like philosophy) lecturer kept giving unclear instructions and deadlines, confusing the whole class and successfully made everyone hand up something he did not want - TWICE. And then we were 'punished' to do his homework again because he was unclear. :steam: I hate most of his homework because usually I have NO IDEA what he wanted from us at all. My ENFP and ENFJ friends agree. I tried asking the lecturer for clearer explanations but it usually confuses us more. He's INFP btw.

I'm a terrible team player when it comes to groupwork. I'm usually so direct that my team members are surprised to see so much intensity coming from a midget. I'll be like "Can't you just follow the video tutorials I sent you on rigging (it's the system used to create 'bones' for 3d models to be animated with)? I told you to do that twice over the span of a few weeks!"
I know I sound like an ESTJ being intense and all, but I really don't see my Te as a preferred function, in fact, I find myself having the need to be intensely motivated before I start doing something. besides, I usually find myself saying "I'm tired, I wanna go home now." after a whole day out at a friend's house. (And going out itself is rare and usually for a reason.)

So... Are there any other ISTJ females around who disagree with what is written on most ISTJ profiles and wants to break a couple of inaccurate stereotypes? The only one that found to be really fitting was this:
The Enigmatic ISTp - Wikisocion
Though I'm not sure how similar scionics ISTp and MBTI ISTJ are.

 

[Two Point Two]

I'm not an ISTJ female, but close...I had a quick look at your other thread, and ISTJ does seem to me to fit.

I think that, where things like fashion are concerned, the water can be muddy. Strong Si would suggest that you might have had a tendency to assimilate much of the culture around you into yourself, and you're female, so it wouldn't be surprising if you were interested in it. But as an ITJ female, I can certainly see how things could go differently. I don't know how much my lack of interest in fashion is related to my N; I think IxTJ is enough to make a person inclined to detach a great deal from social groups and that alone may be enough.

Then, there's the fact that people exhibit a lot of variation that doesn't depend on the MBTI. I guarantee that there exist female ISTJs who don't relate to much of what's presented as feminine in society.

As to feeling as though you didn't fit in - if you're a T, then that may be significant in itself, since they're apparently less common amongst women, and that aside, society tends to shape women to emulate F even if that may not be their natural inclination. If you have retained a strong T in the face of this, it may separate you somewhat.

Be careful about how much emphasis you put on things like being annoyed by your teacher's lack of clear instructions - while Ps are supposed to be fine with that, if it's extreme enough, it can pain even them (and you mention that your ENFP friend felt the same way).

There were many times, where I would be moved to tears (or near) by a touching movie/show.

Could very easily be tertiary Fi; happens to me.

I know I sound like an ESTJ being intense and all, but I really don't see my Te as a preferred function, in fact, I find myself having the need to be intensely motivated before I start doing something. besides, I usually find myself saying "I'm tired, I wanna go home now." after a whole day out at a friend's house. (And going out itself is rare and usually for a reason.)

I didn't realise how much I used Te for a long time. It's a difficult function to describe in an appealing way. It doesn't necessarily inspire you to do, so much - it's more a guide for a way of doing (especially if it's auxiliary; I don't know about dom-Te). A lot of what you've described sounds quite Te to me - your frustration at people operating inefficiently, for example, when you've sent them the information and it shouldn't be that hard to just get it right.

If you prefer structure, and impose structures on things that lack them in order to make them more approachable (think essays, tasks, outings...), you're likely using Te in preference to Ti. Question, and I apologise if you've covered this and I missed it - how do you feel about spontaneity? Do you generally like to plan ahead?

Edit: This probably belongs better in your other thread...ah, well.

 

[Gerbah]

I am also a female ISTJ. I can relate to some of the things you said. Like feeling you don't fit in, I'm strict about some things but I don't have to have everything in perfect order and can really let some things go sometimes, the intensity. I often find myself being treated according to a stereotype. From first impressions people often see me as quiet, serious, simple. Boring. I don't try to project this but maybe it's because I don't put a lot of what I have going on into my image, and it doesn't really bother me if people do misjudge. I guess this can be irritating to people if they are particularly image-conscious.

I read in a book by Lenore Thomson (“Personality Type”) that ISTJs are one of the most quirky and idiosyncratic types “with a highly subjective, original turn of mind”. I think what we have in common that is stereotyped is our approach to the outside world, which is what people see the most, but because of Si, which allocates meaning subjectively, what's on the inside and what we really value can be very different and not stereotypical because it doesn't follow a pattern across the type.

So yeah, this made me laugh:

I'm usually so direct that my team members are surprised to see so much intensity coming from a midget.

Stuff like that happens to me too. E.g. people have tried to push me around because they think I'm not assertive (wrong), or lecture me because they think I'm simple (wrong). But then I open my mouth and they're surprised at what comes out.

 

[sticker]

I'm not an ISTJ female, but close...I had a quick look at your other thread, and ISTJ does seem to me to fit.

I think that, where things like fashion are concerned, the water can be muddy. Strong Si would suggest that you might have had a tendency to assimilate much of the culture around you into yourself, and you're female, so it wouldn't be surprising if you were interested in it. But as an ITJ female, I can certainly see how things could go differently. I don't know how much my lack of interest in fashion is related to my N; I think IxTJ is enough to make a person inclined to detach a great deal from social groups and that alone may be enough.

Then, there's the fact that people exhibit a lot of variation that doesn't depend on the MBTI. I guarantee that there exist female ISTJs who don't relate to much of what's presented as feminine in society.

I think fashion has always been something I found unimportant since it hardly affected how friendly/kind/smart/etc others are. Maybe I disregarded that almost altogether because it felt like irrelevant information to me.

Yup, there are billions of people in the world and only 16 types, I wouldn't be surprised either, though how far variations can stretch is one thing I'm curious about.

As to feeling as though you didn't fit in - if you're a T, then that may be significant in itself, since they're apparently less common amongst women, and that aside, society tends to shape women to emulate F even if that may not be their natural inclination. If you have retained a strong T in the face of this, it may separate you somewhat.

Retained it way too much. But I guess that's the reason why my Fi seems higher than Te.

Be careful about how much emphasis you put on things like being annoyed by your teacher's lack of clear instructions - while Ps are supposed to be fine with that, if it's extreme enough, it can pain even them (and you mention that your ENFP friend felt the same way).

It is indeed extreme...

Could very easily be tertiary Fi; happens to me.

I didn't realise how much I used Te for a long time. It's a difficult function to describe in an appealing way. It doesn't necessarily inspire you to do, so much - it's more a guide for a way of doing (especially if it's auxiliary; I don't know about dom-Te). A lot of what you've described sounds quite Te to me - your frustration at people operating inefficiently, for example, when you've sent them the information and it shouldn't be that hard to just get it right.

Right on the nail. Yes, and especially since they could just follow exactly what the guy on the video does and get the same results.

If you prefer structure, and impose structures on things that lack them in order to make them more approachable (think essays, tasks, outings...), you're likely using Te in preference to Ti. Question, and I apologise if you've covered this and I missed it - how do you feel about spontaneity? Do you generally like to plan ahead?

Edit: This probably belongs better in your other thread...ah, well.

I'm usually not spontaneous about events, I prefer to let things take their own course and pace. As for planning ahead, I hardly do that and prefer to keep my schedule totally free except for important appointments (doctors, group meeting, etc) so that if anything crops up the last minute, I'll most likely be able to entertain it seeing how free my schedule is. (Apart from homework, but that is done on my own at my own pace and I do not need to be anywhere but at home to do them.)

It's fine, it doesn't matter where this post is, as long as I end up reading it.

I am also a female ISTJ. I can relate to some of the things you said. Like feeling you don't fit in, I'm strict about some things but I don't have to have everything in perfect order and can really let some things go sometimes, the intensity. I often find myself being treated according to a stereotype. From first impressions people often see me as quiet, serious, simple. Boring. I don't try to project this but maybe it's because I don't put a lot of what I have going on into my image, and it doesn't really bother me if people do misjudge. I guess this can be irritating to people if they are particularly image-conscious.

I think those can be used to describe me as first impressions too. And maybe anti-social.

I read in a book by Lenore Thomson (“Personality Type”) that ISTJs are one of the most quirky and idiosyncratic types “with a highly subjective, original turn of mind”. I think what we have in common that is stereotyped is our approach to the outside world, which is what people see the most, but because of Si, which allocates meaning subjectively, what's on the inside and what we really value can be very different and not stereotypical because it doesn't follow a pattern across the type.

Ooh, that author! I tried looking for his book in my school library's catalog but it wasn't there... Even the site that dealt with his theories on functions is down... I guess I'll be recommending it to the school so that I can read it for free.
Nvm, I just reserved it from the national library.

Stuff like that happens to me too. E.g. people have tried to push me around because they think I'm not assertive (wrong), or lecture me because they think I'm simple (wrong). But then I open my mouth and they're surprised at what comes out.

Yup, never judge a book by its cover. I shocked my ENFP friend (at that time just an acquaintance) when I was being playfully mean, but truthful, about the librarian who was trying to give a tour of the library to us year 1s. Out of the blue, I just said: "Sucks to be her."

 

[Gerbah]

I think fashion has always been something I found unimportant since it hardly affected how friendly/kind/smart/etc others are. Maybe I disregarded that almost altogether because it felt like irrelevant information to me.

I understand that kind of thinking. Especially when I was much younger I didn't think about how I was coming across to people in a superficial sense. I care more now though because it's just a fact that it's part of life and you can avoid a lot of aggravation by playing along with the rules.

Retained it way too much. But I guess that's the reason why my Fi seems higher than Te.

I have rather high Fi too. I tested as an INFP once, but I'm pretty sure I'm ISTJ.

Yup, never judge a book by its cover. I shocked my ENFP friend (at that time just an acquaintance) when I was being playfully mean, but truthful, about the librarian who was trying to give a tour of the library to us year 1s. Out of the blue, I just said: "Sucks to be her."

Haha, yes, that has happened to me too. Like when an acquaintance was really surprised to see me being loud and boisterous with a friend and said, "I've never seen you like that."

 

[Parsimony]

Like feeling you don't fit in, I'm strict about some things but I don't have to have everything in perfect order and can really let some things go sometimes, the intensity. I often find myself being treated according to a stereotype. From first impressions people often see me as quiet, serious, simple. Boring. I don't try to project this but maybe it's because I don't put a lot of what I have going on into my image, and it doesn't really bother me if people do misjudge. I guess this can be irritating to people if they are particularly image-conscious.

I'm a female ISTJ here. I agree that a lot of times I feel like I don't really fit in. I am not a typical girly girl, nor am I an extreme tomboy, either. Like, Gerbah however, I find it amusing that ppl often stereotype me as the goody-two shoe but when they find out there's more to what meets the eye, they're often taken aback. Many have now commented that I am a mixed bag of surprise.

Unlike the OP, I enjoy fashion and but my style is on the 'boring' side. Clean, classic, simple. I find fashion to be an extension of my self-expression. I know, not very typical of a ISTJ but I border on the T/F.

 

[Donna Cecilia]

Hello everyone,

one of the things I learnt here, is that MBTI is about mental processes. They define just a part of your personality.

And that´s the rational explanation as to why I am "not your typical ISTJ". I relate 100% to the functions explanations, but not to all of the rest.

Walls of text, and paragraphs longer than five lines, are not an ISTJ thing, by the way.

Defining me is a hard task, but I´ll do my best. I´m a walking enigma.

While I dress and behave feminine to the bone, I have a strong male animus which takes over when I have to express what I´m thinking, despite using smooth manners while doing so.

I hate teamwork, unless I´m leading, which is what I always end up doing. Not because I want to, it is because I have to. I often think that "I´m surrounded by fools", and take charge in order to finish the job faster, and be alone and in peace again.

I´m serious and have a strong sense of discipline (if you happen to read what I do to my employees...). But, I´m the one who ends up organizing our parties and meet-ups. Organizing things and people is one of my hobbies.

Not to mention a strong sex drive, ISTJs are deemed as prudes, which I´m not.

The only "typical ISTJ" aspect of me is my work: I´m a Government employee, responsible for the logistics of our tourist information offices.

 

[Parsimony]

Donna_Cecilia, like you, I am usually the one who organizes meet-ups and such with my friends and it just comes naturally.

Btw, we share the same enneagram type except my variant is So/Sp.

 

[Donna Cecilia]

Donna_Cecilia, like you, I am usually the one who organizes meet-ups and such with my friends and it just comes naturally.

Btw, we share the same enneagram type except my variant is So/Sp.

That´s good to know.

Many ISTJs share the 1w9 variant, just check the ISTJ group in Facebook.

 

[rurounimon]

Hello all,

I'm also an ISTJ female. You can't really take each typology description as a matter-of-fact statement. It's a very generic descriptor of yourself, whereas the rest is filled by your upbringing, environment, experiences, etc. Even within each dichotomy, there's a spectrum. This is what makes the world so wonderful

That being said... I guess its still fun to try guess what "type" people are in hopes of vaguely understanding them.

Anyway, I'm not sure what a typical ISTJ female is supposed to be like, but I think I understand why those letters match me.

First off, some other background info on me:
- hardly act or look girly (only sometimes on dates)
- nerdy (i like video games, books, manga, and got a B.S. and M.S. in computer science)
- liberal
- agnostic
- looooooooooooove any kind of good food
- favorite animals: chameleons, tapirs, and penguins

Introvert... I've always been an introvert ever since I was a kid, didn't like to talk much or bring attention to myself. I can handle one-on-one or small group conversations, but don't do too well in settings with more than 4 people (end up being the listener most of the time by then). Being around too many people is exhausting and makes me feel extremely uncomfortable (I hate crowded places like clubs).

Sensing... I strongly rely on facts when making decisions. If someone says to "take my word for it," I'd still end up doing my own research to double check the statement. When solving a problem, I have a hard time understanding the theory itself and have to put it into practice first. For example, with math and computer programming, I need to work out an example problem in order for me to truly understand a concept. Algorithms was one of the hardest computer science classes I've ever taken, since I couldn't quite wrap my mind around some of the subjects! I really wish I could be more intuitive though. My boyfriend's an INTP, and I'm hoping some of it is rubbing off on me.

Thinking... In high school, the test showed me as a Feeler. I used to be very sensitive back then... I'm not sure what really changed me though? Maybe majoring in Comp Sci in college forced me to look more into logic and reason? Also, I think I learned how to control my emotions more. I'm still a crybaby at times though (whether it's a sad/happy book or movie... or even a sick pet chameleon that I bought at an expo that died within 2 days... stupid pet shop). In any case, I don't let emotions affect any big decisions nor what I say to people.

Judging... Kinda fit the general description for this. When it comes to school work or professional work, I like having a set structure and method for plan of attack. I tend to feel flustered when something's not set in stone... and end up planning things on my own. At home, things are a little bit messier since I'm lazy and don't like to clean up.