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[ISFJ] didn't return ISFJ interest initially, and now i regret it!

istar11

New member
Joined
Feb 17, 2009
Messages
21
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w3
Hey everyone, hopefully someone can give some sound advice on this topic,

A girl in my class who i believe is ISFJ (or INFJ possibly, but usually communication is much better between me and other NFs) showed some initial interest in me. I was nice to her but didn't pursue her at all. I had too much on my plate at the time to even think about a relationship, so I avoided her, and most other girls, as well. I also thought she came on a little strong at that time, especially since we hadn't even had a real conversation between us. That kinda threw up a red flag for me, because I believe that anyone coming in fast will also end up losing interest fast, or was desperate for a relationship of any kind, to begin with. Maybe, maybe not, or maybe she's just not very tactful at flirting and expressing romantic interest.

However, I think she's a very interesting, caring, and complex individual, and I would like to get to know her more. I hardly know her at all, I really would like to talk to her more and hope that some chemistry happens naturally between us. The problem is, she is very tense around me now and has put up a big wall. She was quite distant and somewhat somber the last time she talked to me. I get the sense that my presence makes her uncomfortable, and that really hurts me. If I didn't care about her, it wouldn't hurt at all.

Are there any ISFJ women (or perhaps just introverted sensitive ones) out there who can shed some insight into this, or maybe give me some advice about how to proceed with her?

Thanks

The reason I think she is ISFJ is because of the way she makes me feel. This is how I judge others now when I can't type them officially. I knew another type-tested ISFJ, and she made me feel the exact same way. It is tense but I am drawn to her, and there is this deep, insatiable need for her care and approval for me. She has completely won my heart by her sensitivity and authenticity of her emotions.

but I've been way off with someone's type before...
 
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