physical chemistry, and that he is affectionate and makes me feel very good, and is a caring nice person, he gives me pleasure...
and then he drives me nuts...mentally
there is a lack of depth, we try to communicate, and I told him I want him to know me too. But its all about having fun, and doing things, and checking my status, and making plans, and talking about his interests. He doesn't really seem to wan't to know me.
He wanted to share all his movies and music with me on our first date or two, but then, it continued, to more about him, and his stuff. And he just asked so what do you want to do... Not very deep... Also he said that communication is very important to him, yet he and his ex never communicated they just did stuff and had fun, they didn't talk about things beyond the surface level, and he said with me, its "real and scary" I think he is trying... but ultimately it will be a waste of time and energy to invest on my part... but he keeps calling me, and I have already gone back to see him.
Also its hard for me to be just friends, I cant do that, and be intimate physically at the same time...
does he sound like an ISFP??? or is it irrelevant at this point?
It's always irrelevant but whatever he is it sounds like you're not happy so you should let him go. You'll find someone else that you're attracted to.
He lied to me so I ended it. He wouldn't talk to me face to face...
only texting and email. Then after some time. I met with him. And he said he wanted to just be friends and that we had nothing in common. Then three days later he called me saying he realized some things and wanted to get back with me...
That he want's me in his life no matter what and want's my companionship...?
My guess is that it didn't work out with the other girl he was seeing so now he is available... I think he is still looking for other girls though...
Is this normal ISFJ behavior, to lie, then try to be with multiple women. And have them on the side for comfort...?
(edit) that's not really a fair question... sorry ISFJ's
I think anyone is capable of cheating and lying. It depends on a person's values?
I know an ISFJ male who considered himself to be loyal, committed, and gentlemanly, when his GF wasn't around, it wasn't quite the case, and his reputation was to hop from one woman to another by getting to know the female's acquaintence, befriending them, and then dumping the current GF.
I know him personally. He took the test a few times and scored ISFJ. I think that part doesn't really matter though. If someone wants to lie, hurt, or cheat, I tend to think that it's indicative of learned values/behaviors, and/or an incompatible relationship that brings out the worst in people.
If I were in this predicament, I would definitely say good-bye in my own way by not responding. I dislike relationship endings, but I think in the long-run, I'd be much happier if I were true to myself.
I find ISFJs lovely and huggable if a bit frustrating and rigid at times. they're loyal and dependable and empathize and I can *trust* them. They're like less N-y INFJs (which are also a lovely and trustworthy breed in my experience)
"I have never in my life envied a human being who led an easy life; I have envied a great many people who led difficult lives and led them well."