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  1. #11
    Senior Member NewEra's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by InfiniteIntrigue View Post
    (ESTJ) My father loves it for some reason,
    he thrives off it. Not me.
    Same, maybe it's the ESTJs who like conflict.

  2. #12
    Senior Member GirlFromMars's Avatar
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    See, my boyfriend (IS*J, not sure wether he's T or F - got very low T.) is soo bad with conflict. If I get all emotional-confrontingy on him he's like a deer in headlights! I don't like conflict, but he's even worse than me and I'm an INFP! (Heh, that rhymes) He says he feels dissapointed when I get upset with him, like he's let me down, and is also too laid-back for conflict. Sometimes I argue with myself when trying to argue with him. It's not that I want to argue with him, it's just sometimes arguments come about and they're valid! I love him BTW, he's a great person. But, I was just wondering if this is a typical SJ reaction.

  3. #13
    Carerra Lu IZthe411's Avatar
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    I recognize that conflict exists as a part of life, and I'd rather deal with it and get it out the way than avoid it.

  4. #14
    Senior Member Saslou's Avatar
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    I don't like it but if it does arise, let it be discussed rationally then just laugh it off and move on.
    “I made you take time to look at what I saw and when you took time to really notice my flower, you hung all your associations with flowers on my flower and you write about my flower as if I think and see what you think and see—and I don't.”
    ― Georgia O'Keeffe

  5. #15
    this is my winter song EJCC's Avatar
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    I actually agree with Saslou and IZthe411. Also, I really, really dislike emotional conflict, e.g. someone is mad at someone else, and you have to calm them down. I'm really bad at speaking the language that's required to deal with that kind of problem. A little voice in the back of my head keeps going "Rrgh! They're not being LOGICAL right now! WHY can't they be REASONED with???", and I get in a sort of rut. (Of course, this isn't true with everyone; when my INTP friends are angry, I've noticed that being very, very rational and unemotional with them, and reasoning with them THAT way (which I'm good at) calms them down.)
    ~ g e t f e s t i v e ! ~


    EJCC: "The Big Questions in my life right now: 1) What am I willing to live with? 2) What do I have to live with? 3) What can I change for the better?"
    Coriolis: "Is that the ESTJ Serenity Prayer?"



    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
    1w2/7w6/3w4 so/sx (enneagram)
    want to ask me something? go for it!

  6. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by GirlFromMars View Post
    See, my boyfriend (IS*J, not sure wether he's T or F - got very low T.) is soo bad with conflict. If I get all emotional-confrontingy on him he's like a deer in headlights! I don't like conflict, but he's even worse than me and I'm an INFP! (Heh, that rhymes) He says he feels dissapointed when I get upset with him, like he's let me down, and is also too laid-back for conflict. Sometimes I argue with myself when trying to argue with him. It's not that I want to argue with him, it's just sometimes arguments come about and they're valid! I love him BTW, he's a great person. But, I was just wondering if this is a typical SJ reaction.
    Ive heard NFPs rant about me and rant about others and your type does tend to argue with yourself. Sometimes its under your breath or internally. Its kinda entertaining and interesting to have an NFP rant at you, but yes I feel bad at the same time. I respond like you said. If I feel like it I will argue back, but most of the time I really am too laid-back to argue, prefer to just explain my point of view in a regular manner.
    Im out, its been fun

  7. #17
    Habitual Fi LineStepper JocktheMotie's Avatar
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    While my ESTJ does not really have a problem with conflict in terms of getting through it or facing it, she doesn't seem to be able to separate the conflict from the issue, from the personal relationship, or its source. It tends to color and have an influence on everything she does. While I'm perfectly able to discuss conflicts, have arguments and disagreements, I can instantaneously resume my normal mode of operation regardless of whether the conflict has really been resolved or not. She however, can't [or doesn't] detach herself at all. I don't know if this is unique to her or maybe other SJs can relate.



  8. #18
    No moss growing on me Giggly's Avatar
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    ^I definitely relate to your ESTJ, but I will try not to do that because sometimes like you said life has to go on and normal mode of operation has to continue, but it's really hard to do. Sometimes i'm successful at it and sometimes not. Hmm, I always thought that was just an F thing?

  9. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by JocktheMotie View Post
    While my ESTJ does not really have a problem with conflict in terms of getting through it or facing it, she doesn't seem to be able to separate the conflict from the issue, from the personal relationship, or its source. It tends to color and have an influence on everything she does. While I'm perfectly able to discuss conflicts, have arguments and disagreements, I can instantaneously resume my normal mode of operation regardless of whether the conflict has really been resolved or not. She however, can't [or doesn't] detach herself at all. I don't know if this is unique to her or maybe other SJs can relate.
    Does your ESTJ also think that things you do after the fact also colors and influences what you do? My ENFJ seems to think that my weak Fe after an argument is something I do purposley because of the argument as opposed to something I am just not good at.
    Im out, its been fun

  10. #20
    Habitual Fi LineStepper JocktheMotie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Giggly View Post
    ^I definitely relate to your ESTJ, but I will try not to do that because sometimes like you said life has to go on and normal mode of operation has to continue, but it's really hard to do. Sometimes i'm successful at it and sometimes not. Hmm, I always thought that was just an F thing?
    Well it's not so much that I do so out of some concept of life needing to go on, but more so because it seems like a natural thing to do. There really isn't any conscious effort on my part. If anything though, I think it may be Je thing: NJs may feel the same way, I just have far less personal interaction with them to go off of.

    Quote Originally Posted by poki View Post
    Does your ESTJ also think that things you do after the fact also colors and influences what you do? My ENFJ seems to think that my weak Fe after an argument is something I do purposley because of the argument as opposed to something I am just not good at.
    I don't really understand what you mean here.



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