I am moving in with my boyfriend in the next few months, and it's going to be a messy situation as he has children and an ex-wife. I am pretty sure she is ISFJ - she doesn't like social situations (introvert), thinks my INFP boyfriend is overly pretentious and intellectual (S), reacts emotionally to things (F) and is quite traditional and religious (SJ). Oh, and she has borderline personality disorder - the joy!
This Sunday I am going to be meeting her for the first time, mostly to talk about arrangements for the kids (one of whom is a high-functioning autistic) and how I'm going to deal with them. I am terrified - it doesn't help that I only have my boyfriend's version of her, which is bound to be negative.
But also the fact that she's ISFJ doesn't help. As an INTP, I find xFSJs the hardest people to deal with - I just had a run in with my ESFJ friend when I managed to completely rub her the wrong way and resulted in us not speaking to each other for nearly a month.
So - I was wondering if you ISFJs could offer me any advice on the ways in which I can approach the meeting that is going to get our relationship off on the best start possible. I know I need to do things that will make her Feeling side reassured, but I don't know how. I've thought of making notes so if there are particular things she wants me to do, I'll make a list so she knows that I am taking them seriously. But other than that, I don't know.