Maybe some of you are ISTJs or have insights into them so can give me feedback.
I've been dating what I'm pretty sure is an ISTJ for about a month. He's steady, sweet, reliable and patient, but he can live in his own world. I get it since I can live in my own world too and I need some down time to myself.
We've been dating about a month but because of various commitments have mostly ended up seeing each other about one day a week for at least half the day--aside from some short emails back and forth in between. His generally shorter and more businesslike than mine.
We've both talked about how comfortable we feel with each other. We're both very attracted, and we both have enormous respect for the other. Our communication is decent, though there is always a bit of a disconnect where he takes me too seriously and doesn't get my irony and exaggeration and I don't always get his humor.
At one point, he said I was welcome to visit him anytime and he's always open to talking. That's what he said, anyway. I'm feeling it's about time to step things up to a little more than once a week, so I called him last night about 24-hours after we last hung out. We talked for about 30 minutes on the phone and it went fine, but I couldn't help feeling like I was intruding a little. Not because he was ever rude, but it just felt a bit of a chore, maybe he wanted to be left alone then.
He mentioned we'd talk tomorrow, but I figured he'd call today (though it wasn't ever specified who would call who), but nothing. I just don't know if I should assume responsibility for making contact if I want it more often or if I should wait more for reciprocation.
The other side is that he told me that he can be in his own world and get a little depressed and lost without noticing, sometimes. I also get a bit concerned that he can isolate himself and perhaps more contact would be good, but he just doesn't do it.
So . . . I really don't know if 1) he meant the things he said about contacting him anytime and 2) how much I should expect him to reciprocate, and 3) how often is good to contact him at this point.
It's a bit weird since when we're together, I think we both feel very good. But when he's by himself I think it can be a little bit of "out of sight, out of mind."
I would drop by his place since I think he's better in person than on the phone, but he lives 30 minutes away and his house is being remodeled at the moment, so it's problematic in a few ways.
What do you all suggest I do and how to approach it?