User Tag List

123 Last

Results 1 to 10 of 37

  1. #1
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    MBTI
    INTP
    Posts
    134

    Default Those Who Take Offense to Other's Appearance

    Edited for objectivity.

    Continue discussion if desired.
    Last edited by Schizm; 11-06-2007 at 09:26 AM.

  2. #2
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    FREE
    Enneagram
    594 sx/sp
    Socionics
    LII Ne
    Posts
    42,333

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Schizm View Post
    The types who have criticized my appearance in the past have been SJ the majority of the time from what I gather. I am male who has in the past let his hair grow out a bit. Why does this offend certain SJ's?
    One thing to note is the age of the person criticizing you. In the 1960's, in the United States, long hair on men was socially a [purposeful] sign of disrespect for the government and/or reigning authority... rebellion against the norms.

    By the 1980's, long hair on young adult males did not really mean this at all, any longer (IMO); but it was still associated with rock music, drugs, rebellion, etc., a lack of "discipline." (and it was still a direct assault on the "gender" barrier, with many male rock stars wearing female hair styles as well as makeup).

    Nowadays with the cultural changes that have occurred, I think it is not a big deal at all, really. But still, any Baby Boomers and/or older generations are prone to see it as rebellious. Gen X'ers and younger are more prone to see it as a sign of individuality.

    Side Note: I have also been harassed by an ESFJ for my choice of clothes and criticized by an ISFJ. Why do some SJ's think they have the best sense of style?
    I would correct this to say they think they have an understanding of "appropriate" style. It's not necessarily the clothes and hair that are contentious, it is the manner and place in where you exhibit them and how.

    Without details, there is no way to assess what is really going on. There are just generalities that might or might not apply to your situation.
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

    “Pleasure to me is wonder—the unexplored, the unexpected, the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate; the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty.” ~ H.P. Lovecraft

  3. #3
    Senior Member INTJMom's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    MBTI
    INTJ
    Posts
    5,350

    Default

    I agree with Jennifer. My ISTJ mother thinks there is ONE WAY to do everything - her way. Her way is based on what is right and good for all mankind; it shows discipline and respect. It obeys authority.

  4. #4
    Plumage and Moult proteanmix's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Enneagram
    1w2
    Posts
    5,514

    Default

    When I worked at Victoria's Secret I was on entrance detail trying to entice people to buy Heavenly or some fragrance. I remember this guy was walking down the corridor wearing a belt with "FUCK" flashing in multicolored lights on the buckle. Another time when this woman was wearing a less discrete version of J.Lo's Emmy dress and men were walking into the trash cans because they were so busy looking at her.

    Most of the time, I really don't care what people are wearing as long as they don't stink. I actually like creative dressers. If the people I mentioned were wearing that stuff at 2 AM at a club, no I wouldn't think it was unusual. But there is a line somewhere and the people above crossed it. I think it's because I consider malls a family environment, although the mall I worked at it wasn't unusual to see people dressed like they were on a runway.

    I'm not sure why these people would be offended by the length of your hair. If your clothes don't fit properly or are dirty then I can see a comment. But I'm going to be honest, it's not like I don't clown people for what they're wearing so I'M PART OF THE PROBLEM!!! What I don't get is when I see people walking around in shorts and flip flops in the middle of January. It took me the longest time to realize that maybe, just maybe, they're not cold. It's like contemplating infinity to me, my mind just wobbles and shakes and then I pass out in the bathroom.
    Relationships have normal ebbs and flows. They do not automatically get better and better when the participants learn more and more about each other. Instead, the participants have to work through the tensions of the relationship (the dialectic) while they learn and group themselves and a parties in a relationships. At times the relationships is very open and sharing. Other time, one or both parties to the relationship need their space, or have other concerns, and the relationship is less open. The theory posits that these cycles occur throughout the life of the relationship as the persons try to balance their needs for privacy and open relationship.
    Interpersonal Communication Theories and Concepts
    Social Penetration Theory 1
    Social Penetration Theory 2
    Social Penetration Theory 3

  5. #5
    Senior Membrane spirilis's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    MBTI
    InTP
    Enneagram
    9w1 sp
    Socionics
    INTj Ni
    Posts
    2,652

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by proteanmix View Post
    It's like contemplating infinity to me, my mind just wobbles and shakes and then I pass out in the bathroom.
    that seriously made me laugh out loud.

    proteanmix passed out in front of the toilet? No vodka needed, just a mathematical limit problem...

  6. #6
    Wait, what? Varelse's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    MBTI
    INTJ
    Posts
    1,698

    Default

    ISFJ comments about my clothing: "I don't like that color on you. Don't wear it." (After I've had several other people compliment me on it.)

    "That shirt is too immodest. Don't wear it." (When I'm wearing a tank-top that doesn't have spaghetti straps, or a low neck, etc. Just a tank-top).

    Such seems to be related to some definition of style, modesty, etc, that the SJ in such assumes is universal, because that's what they use.

    Personally, about the only thing that would annoy me would be something like the belt Proteanmix mentioned-if it is a public place where families are common.
    We are not poets
    We have no right to make amendments

  7. #7
    Senior Member INTJMom's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    MBTI
    INTJ
    Posts
    5,350

    Default

    Yeah. I can't stand the f word being so common.

  8. #8
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    MBTI
    INTX
    Posts
    25

    Default

    SJ means introverted Sensing. Which means trying to avoid unpleasant or undesired physical stimulation. So if your clothes are an eyesore or (God forbid) causing unwanted sexual stimulation... you are probably going to get some criticism from SJs.

  9. #9
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    961

    Default

    Being offended by someone's appearance and being an asshole are two different things. I think tattoos are stupid and ugly but I wouldn't tell a person with tattoos, "Hey... 'mere. Your tattoos are stupid and ugly." I'd say the problem is people who can't keep their J to themselves.

  10. #10
    Per Ardua Metamorphosis's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2007
    MBTI
    INTJ
    Posts
    3,466

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Varelse View Post
    ISFJ comments about my clothing: "I don't like that color on you. Don't wear it." (After I've had several other people compliment me on it.)
    Ugh. I Hate it when people comment on my clothing that don't know me well and make it constructive. I went back to a restraunt I used to work at once a few months after I had left and a waitress I knew walked up to my table.

    Her: Black doesn't suit you. You shouldn't wear it.
    Me: *blank stare* Well, it was good seeing you. *ignore*
    "You will always be fond of me. I represent to you all the sins you never had the courage to commit."

    Reason is, and ought only to be the slave of the passions, and can never pretend to any other office
    than to serve and obey them. - David Hume

Similar Threads

  1. [JCF] For those who are new to the cognitive function theory
    By wolfnara in forum Myers-Briggs and Jungian Cognitive Functions
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 03-25-2016, 10:34 PM
  2. [E4] need for ego boosts: Do all 4's take offense to this?
    By Evolving Transparency in forum Enneatypes
    Replies: 26
    Last Post: 08-15-2013, 03:35 AM
  3. Replies: 30
    Last Post: 01-14-2010, 08:10 PM
  4. To those who care
    By 527468 in forum Welcomes and Introductions
    Replies: 30
    Last Post: 05-05-2009, 05:39 PM
  5. Replies: 77
    Last Post: 02-27-2008, 01:27 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO