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[MBTI General] Are ISFJs the better INFJs ?

Arclight

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There is nothing wrong with giving it your best shot .. As a suppporter, i also want to help people fix their problems. At the end of the day though, i can only give advice, they have to do the hard work and actually implement it, should they choose. You are not useless because you didn't get the result you wanted. You gave it your best .. Many people would walk away .. But still at the end of the day, these people have to take accountability for their own actions/thoughts/feelings, no matter how hard you tried.

This is good advice saslou .. It sounds like you have some experience;)
 

tinker683

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I like group hugs! :D
 

KLessard

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I've been lurking around the NF forums for quite some time now and I have been searching there for someone to help me with my personal problems, like for example psychologists help. I tho have a misfit way of speaking about my things, which didnt get noticed with any of the psychics over there (except for one or two enfps, who really have a knack for such things).

Instead I met arrogance, abusive behaviour, the occasional bragging about them being like god, when it comes to their abilities or sheer ignorance.

So I came to think: An ISFJ, who types her-/himself that way from the start and who doesnt even assume for the slightest moment that he is special in any way, because she or he for example never achieved anything special so far (which would be prolly the case with 90% of the Ns), isnt she or he much more down-to-earth and more realistic + able to look at the world from an (as much as that is possible) objective point of view and to give people real world advice and help, cause he isnt blinded by his own ego ?

I dont want to discredit all of the INFJs over there, but I am still refering to around 90%.

Any thoughts ?


I'm sorry if I hurt you, entropie. :cry:

I don't look down at sensors at all, I'm always ashamed of myself when I realize how bad I am at fitting in with them, even if I try. As I child, I hated being different, and so wished I was like everyone else (I now understand "everyone" is the sensors-the majority of population).
ISFJs are great and generally compassionate and I've had great conversations with many of them.
I still think that as a N, you'll probably express a lot of things they won't understand or see the relevance of.
 

entropie

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Ok I will try something now cause I am taking french courses for 4 weeks in University :D

Regarding the N person and her/his behaviour in group situations:

Tu peux fair indifferent, un de l'homme ( the N ) a peur toujours ! :D

Did that make sense at all ? :D
 

KLessard

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Ok I will try something now cause I am taking french courses for 4 weeks in University :D

Regarding the N person and her/his behaviour in group situations:

Tu peux fair indifferent, un de l'homme ( the N ) a peur toujours ! :D

Did that make sense at all ? :D

Hummmm, I'm not sure what you mean, exactly.

Do you mean:

"It doesn't make any difference, the N man is still scared?"
(I can help you with the French if you want, I am a French-Canadian.)
 

entropie

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Ya i know :D

No we were talking in a group lately about something and the guy who was talking said that when he was to place xyz they wated to do xyz but only one person didnt want to do what the group wanted to do. And he commented this with: "One is always afraid" which was meant to be funny :D.

So I wanted to say in french:

"You cant do anything about it, cause someone ( the N ) always is afraid" :D
 

KLessard

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Ya i know :D

No we were talking in a group lately about something and the guy who was talking said that when he was to place xyz they wated to do xyz but only one person didnt want to do what the group wanted to do. And he commented this with: "One is always afraid" which was meant to be funny :D.

So I wanted to say in french:

"You cant do anything about it, cause someone ( the N ) always is afraid" :D

That would be:

"Tu ne peux rien y faire, l'intuitif (N) est toujours méfiant."

"Méfiant" here means that you're afraid to trust. Is that the kind of fear you were talking about?
 

entropie

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Cant say for sure cause it was a joke with no real meaning, but:

I was close :D ( We gonna talk again in 1 year when I had more of french class d'accord? ) :D
 

KLessard

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Cant say for sure cause it was a joke with no real meaning, but:

I was close :D ( We gonna talk again in 1 year when I had more of french class d'accord? ) :D

D'accord. ;)
 

NewEra

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Once again, this sounds like it's something individually-related, not type-related at all.
 

LotsOfHeart

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I found the original post here to be a pretty uninformed one. How can you say that one entire type is better than another entire type? Sure, we tend to individually get along with certain types better than others on average, but to say ISFJs are better than INFJs is ridiculous.

Humbleness is a personal trait, one that any type can have. I've known intuitive people who were self-absorbed, and sensing people who were self-absorbed. There is no exclusivity in this regard. The fact that anyone would assume such a thing is naive to say the least.

How would you like it if I said ESTPs were better, and more humble than ENTPs? No one type is better than any other type. Certain types on this website have been jerks to me on here, but I don't blame their types for that behavior.

Not trying to be mean, just saying...
 

weakshadeofblue

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LotsOfHeart said:
I found the original post here to be a pretty uninformed one. How can you say that one entire type is better than another entire type? Sure, we tend to individually get along with certain types better than others on average, but to say ISFJs are better than INFJs is ridiculous.

Humbleness is a personal trait, one that any type can have. I've known intuitive people who were self-absorbed, and sensing people who were self-absorbed. There is no exclusivity in this regard. The fact that anyone would assume such a thing is naive to say the least.

This is what I was thinking as well.
Your post is about a personal issue that you're struggling with and would like some guidance on (from what I gather), yet you titled your threat "Are ISFJs the better INFJs?" It's not very nice to place personalities in a "hierarchy." Yes, each person connects well and not so well with different types, but that's no reason to say one is better than another...

I'll speak for myself, as I haven't been on the board long enough to notice any sort of discrimination toward S's or arrogance about INFJs. But I know I can be very arrogant.

However, I also believe that on some level, -every- person is arrogant, some more than others, and some more noticeably than others, but it's there (an ENTP friend of mine is actually incredibly arrogant, so this trait is not confined to one type).

I just found those two points kind of hurtful. But at the same time, I am reminded again to forego my stubbornness when it comes to ideas, etc. and truly analyze whether they are applicable or not, and consider others opinions truly and with thought. So thank you :).

Anyway, I'm sorry no one picked up on your feelings adequately in the NF forum (I didn't see your thread). I hope you find the answers you need, but I'm not exactly sure what you're asking. However, it is a little difficult to expect people not to mention MBTI in reference to a problem when the question is asked in a forum that is -about- MBTI.
 

Billy

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Someone said in this thread.. That INFJ's are more in tune with Group dynamics..

I am curious about this...
Since I find that INFJ's seem to have an expectation that the world should learn to understand them and not the other way around..
Their over all sense of being wounded by life .. separates them from the group as well as the individual.. they can't connect with either, unless a very strict code of conduct is followed by others.. especially if you are "chosen"

It does come across as very arrogant.. and for all their flexibility.. they close off and become rigid when they need people most..

It's sad, really

Its because of our insane Ni and Fe combo, we execute Fe all day long and sometimes we lose our feelings in all of your and everyone else s feelings. When you say we should try to understand you, I feel confused, we DO understand you, its why we go out of our way to be kind and courteous and try to make the people around us as happy as possible. Because we cannot feel at peace if we let you feel bad or feel unhappy. Its how we are wired and the Ni just exacerbates everything by making everything more accurate and connecting all the right dots together. You have NO idea what its like to feel this way, to find it easier to just be alone as often as possible when we are feeling vulnerable which is quite often. I am not saying other types don't feel vulnerable etc either, but imagine it being like a hyper sense of it and it all boils down to how we act around others, its why we are so hyper self aware of our actions and so obsessed with "doing the right thing".

We DO understand you, its what we do, its how we work. INFJs are extreme people persons.

That you dont understand that is why we are so isolated, that you dont understand that is why we have to protect ourselves from other people so often. I am not a sissy b oy by any stretch but imagine that every time you saw a sad movie where the characters were all crying you immediately began crying uncontrollably too because you cant separate yourself from what you are seeing. I cried twice today watching the tv show House... and I don't know why, I just see the sad bitterness and I start rolling. The weird part is that pain caused to me directly doesn't even hurt me emotionally. I broke up with an ex girlfriend once and I was completely fine and able to move on, as soon as I considered how much hurt she might be feeling BAMMO! crocodile tears.

I am sorry if you mistake our shields as arrogance, it really isn't... its just our way of protecting a very gooey core from a very very mean world.
 

SilkRoad

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The thing that annoys me most about my fellow INFJs, at least online, is the whole "I am psychic, I can read everyone's motives and mind accurately, and I have never been wrong about anyone, not even once in my life."

There seems to be a lot of that out there. How arrogant! I have to say that if you have run into that attitude a lot, I don't blame you for being put off.
 

entropie

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While creating this thread, I was wondering too if type creates people. Of course you are right in saying not all INFJs are the same, but in saying so one does accept that such a thing like an INFJ exists at all. And because I dont believe in type, I phrased it that way, cause and I said that already, I am most intrested in the fact if type can form a person, who maybe didnt exist at all before.

But I think that's a topic for another thread, this one was purely about venting, I admit and I am sorry.
 

Giggly

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But I think that's a topic for another thread, this one was purely about venting, I admit and I am sorry.

Okay, but you could have put this thread in the NF section if all you wanted was INFJ's attention. ISFJ's have feelings.
 
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