It can take a great amount of effort for NT's and ESFJ's to get along (naturally, with 2 primary functions that oppose our own)

Some things I've learned:
- They take things a lot more personally than we do
- They can become insecure with lack of harmony in the group whereas for us that wouldn't be a big concern
- They often need to have a known structure to a project in order to feel like its succeeding (too much disorder can really worry a J)

I think the best thing you could do is to very clearly establish everything to them, like how you prefer to get the job done, what brainstorming methods work for each of you, what goals and deadlines you want to set, how much space you each need, and so on.

Even if the ESFJ doesn't understand your methods, they can at least feel like you'd both be doing your best to contribute to the common goal and have some set of established rules to follow. It gives them a sense of security that everything will succeed, and gives them the ability to think "hey he's doing this because thats how he is, not because there's an underlying emotional issue between us"