He let out more of his Si interests on me after we started going out (i guess that might be because i became part of his introverted landscape so he felt more comfortable being himself), so I was O_O at first since I really didn't expect him to be that... quirky... but it is GOOD hehehehe
I think his Fe softens him a bit so he doesn't nag me whenever I'm doing things he doesn't approve (e.g. he believes in dressing appropriately ALL the time and not just waltzing haphazardly with bad hair and forgotten deodorant into the unsuspecting masses).
Although when he really doesn't approve of smth, but feels like he can't really tell me about it, he can get quite Mr. Sulky.
This happened, for example, when he didn't like my best friend (INFJ), but felt like he couldn't tell me because she was my best friend.... i think he was kinda jealous... or felt like he wasn't "special"...
I'm not asking about tradition. I'm asking about counter cultures, which are basically subcultures below the mainstream radar, usually with a rebellious vibe to them. I guess they are not "normal", as defined by the average standards in society and culture. Not necessarily some offensive deviation either, but off the beaten path and atypical.
Most SJs I know like popular entertainment that is well-known by their peers (all over TV and radio). They enjoy the typical past times of playing/watching sports, going to the movies, bowling, whatever. They usually identify with the usual group(s), be it family, work family, and/or church, etc. I notice SJs who don't identify with one of those groups are the ones who veer into counter culture.
Not saying other types don't do this (obviously they do), but SJs seem to be less likely to have quirky interests, or to go outside the typical groups stated above. In some ways, I envy it, because when around other people they all bond over liking/doing the same things, and I often have nothing to say. They look at me like, "Do you live under a rock?", and yeah, I kind of do.
I think it's fair to say that SJs generally take some comfort in identifying with the majority, as opposed to belonging to a small niche. So I'm wondering what would cause them to seek out a narrower niche and abandon the broader majority in some ways?
I think all people have a need to identify with the majority on some level. No one is an individual in the absolute sense.
And I don't think there's any type that doesn't participate in those things you mentioned, to some extent.
SJs have quirky interests just like any other type. You probably don't recognize them because they aren't advertising it. It's on a need to know basis or something like that.
I know it's an old topic, but...it's an interesting one :P
Originally Posted by Kai
Despite knowing there isn't really a set norm. Along with some of the other SJs here I wanted to stand out because my idea of average, living a simple life that doesn't really have much meaning to it. Work, eat and sleep sounds like a horrible way to live even if they are fundamental things.
They do say that people that really are different strive to integrate into normal society and vice versa. Guess that knowledge keeps me reminded that I'm just a normal person that's striving for more. Is ambition considered as counter-culture? I feel that it is.
If I understand you correctly, I feel the same. My core life is very, well, boring. I've always excelled at school, and now I'm doing very nicely at work (which also takes up a lot of my time and energy). I have a core group of very civilised friends, a long-term ISFJ boyfriend (the epitome of stable and loving)... but I really miss being a rebellious teen!! I was very into counter-culture when younger. I used to hang around with the metalheads/goths under railway bridges smoking weed, having casual sex in public and suchlike, while going to hardcore metal concerts and goth clubs. I think I live a rigid life of being socially acceptable, because it's in my nature, but I really love the feeling of being free and not giving a damn. My most exciting experiences have been when I've got off my head on alcohol and just run wild. To be honest, I haven't done that for a while now and I can feel the rebellious me bursting to get out... It's slightly worrying because I know that I can do anything to get my life more 'exciting', and I'm worried I might muck up my life. I need some exciting friends to help me out!
I'm still into the goth culture. I listen to the music and go to goth clubs, but I don't usually dress that way due to fear of social repercussions. I have a melancholy personality that dwells on the dark side of life and the negative possibilities, and that's probably why I'm drawn to it. Plus goth and industrial are truly the most incredible types of music.
Originally Posted by Beat
I've always gravitated towards those that are a little off-beat in some fashion. I've got my annoyances within any social type though. A lot of counter-culture people really irritate me with some of their mindless far left views and their "down with the power" propaganda they like to drop wherever they can. I like social and political awareness, but there's a good population of brain-washed and irrational individuals in the counter-culture scene.
That whole need to be considered as left-wing as possible to fit in did put me off a great deal. The most interesting thing is when people have their own well-thought out viewpoints, and don't just try to follow the opinion of their friends/peers to fit in. I've long been Conservative politically (UK sort - def not Republican), even when to announce this fact was social suicide - and I kept this hidden for a long time. Actually, when I did tell people they were so shocked they didn't know how to react! They were amazed that 'one of them' could think that way
And yes - most of my friends are out of the 'social norm', or 'misfits'...even now. My ISFJ complains about it a lot: "Why can't you be friends with normal people?" he'll ask, and he calls them "freaks" even though he does like them really. I don't think he can come to terms with the fact my 'weird' friends are actually likeable.
It's hard to say. Pretty much everyone I've ever known likes to "stand out from the pack" and proudly mocks convention. I usually end up pretty anti-counter-culture. But, does my conventionality actually make me stand out? Who knows. It'd be like having children named John and Mary. These days, would that be conventional or iconoclastic?
I do not classify myself as countercultural, nor do I think anyone else does. I am not part of the pop scene, but I am also not into any emo/goth/metal/etc scenes. Basically, I live in the 1950s. Or at least I wish I were in the 1950s.
I usually scorn anything outside the main stream. Then again, I am rather disillusioned with society in general. Maybe I am just plain grumpy.