[SJ] SJ's and Reading People

[Just another ISTJ]

I consider myself fairly good at reading people. It's mostly via visual observations, but sometimes I just get an intuitive vibe about certain people.

 

[Totenkindly]

Maybe they are, but sometimes the paranoia and suspician causes them to completely misread a person, since they are only using surface triggers to make the assessment.

My isfj friend does have an uncanny ability to read people, yet often her glass half empty assumptions about people mean that she could be wrong, but won't ever allow herself to find that out because of the snap judgements.

That's usually been my issue with SJ's doing type.

They're good at details and catch small things, but often they seem to not be nearly as good at putting together the big picture.

As long as the cultural clues/behaviors they were raised with as indicative of people have not changed, they do okay; but typically out of that subculture they read things wrong. I know a lot of brilliant ISFJ/ISTJ people but they tend to misread people who are not ISTJ/ISFJ types, unless they have had extensive experience with other sorts of people that they can draw on.

There is the natural bent towards drawing conclusions based on the sign, not the underlying essence.
And the bent to draw conclusions when not enough information has yet been acquired.
And the bent to not imagine a wide enough range of possibilities for a particular behavior or see behavior in context.

That has just been my experience.

(of course, then N's go and pull the floozy "N" thing or else ignore details they don't like or even attribute too much flex in a situation where the person shouldn't be trusted to begin with, so I guess it all equals out. )

 

[Saslou]

That's usually been my issue with SJ's doing type.

They're good at details and catch small things, but often they seem to not be nearly as good at putting together the big picture.

As long as the cultural clues/behaviors they were raised with as indicative of people have not changed, they do okay; but typically out of that subculture they read things wrong. I know a lot of brilliant ISFJ/ISTJ people but they tend to misread people who are not ISTJ/ISFJ types, unless they have had extensive experience with other sorts of people that they can draw on.

There is the natural bent towards drawing conclusions based on the sign, not the underlying essence.
And the bent to draw conclusions when not enough information has yet been acquired.
And the bent to not imagine a wide enough range of possibilities for a particular behavior or see behavior in context.

That has just been my experience.

When i read people, i don't do it based on their type. I don't know enough about all this yet.
When people come to me and say 'this, that and the other' about someone.. i am going deeper. I want to know the why's, what's, when's .. Grantly, i am only hearing one side of the story. Yet knwoing nothing of the person other than what i am told. Still get it pretty much right. We are not that complex at the end of the day.

 

[Poki]

When i read people, i don't do it based on their type. I don't know enough about all this yet.
When people come to me and say 'this, that and the other' about someone.. i am going deeper. I want to know the why's, what's, when's .. Grantly, i am only hearing one side of the story. Yet knwoing nothing of the person other than what i am told. Still get it pretty much right. We are not that complex at the end of the day.

From interacting with an ENFJ, not sure about ESFJ, but the blunt, starightforward answers can wear on people over time and the closer you are the more blunt and straightforward an ENFJ may become, so someone who was once very open starts closing up. On the other hand I have no idea how to get people to open up to me IRL.

 

[Saslou]

From interacting with an ENFJ, not sure about ESFJ, but the blunt, starightforward answers can wear on people over time and the closer you are the more blunt and straightforward an ENFJ may become, so someone who was once very open starts closing up. On the other hand I have no idea how to get people to open up to me IRL.

Your post does confuse me ... i am not sure what exactly you are saying so i am going to interpret it as ...........
I prefer people to be blunt and straightforward with me. I will do the same back, although i am careful not to hurt their feelings, but thats going to happen anyway. As long as they know there was no malicious intent involved, all's good.
I have seen some of your posts. You seem to easily express yourself and you are forward so thats not a bad thing. People just come to me, i don't know why. I'll ask one day, but not being egotistical i don't really care.
I just like helping people.

 

[Lambchop]

I consider myself fairly good at reading people. It's mostly via visual observations, but sometimes I just get an intuitive vibe about certain people.

This is how I am as well. I'm EXTREMELY observant and I tend to people watch. I personally thing this has more to do with emotional intelligence (ie, picking up social cues, body language, facial expressions) than the SJ part. My hubby is an INFP and has "the N intuition," but a majority of the time...I am spot on and he didn't even notice half the things I do. Maybe because I remember all the observations I make because I'm good with details about people, though. Maybe all the stored details helps give me insight gives me something to reference.

 

[SubjectA]

That's usually been my issue with SJ's doing type.

They're good at details and catch small things, but often they seem to not be nearly as good at putting together the big picture.

As long as the cultural clues/behaviors they were raised with as indicative of people have not changed, they do okay; but typically out of that subculture they read things wrong. I know a lot of brilliant ISFJ/ISTJ people but they tend to misread people who are not ISTJ/ISFJ types, unless they have had extensive experience with other sorts of people that they can draw on.

There is the natural bent towards drawing conclusions based on the sign, not the underlying essence.
And the bent to draw conclusions when not enough information has yet been acquired.
And the bent to not imagine a wide enough range of possibilities for a particular behavior or see behavior in context.

That has just been my experience.

(of course, then N's go and pull the floozy "N" thing or else ignore details they don't like or even attribute too much flex in a situation where the person shouldn't be trusted to begin with, so I guess it all equals out. )

Yup. There are some cynical intuitives out there that always assume the worst in people.

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