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Thread: ISFJ vs. ESFJ

  1. #51
    Member RiftsWRX's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by StephMC View Post
    So I remember seeing a thread about someone wondering if they were an ISFJ or ESFJ the other day, and I forgot to comment. I also didn't see the harm in making a thread in the SJ Guardhouse about it. :P

    Anyways, I don't know that many SFJs except my mom and a friend, and I've always wondered if there were any huge differences. I heard ISFJs can be quite extroverted at times. Is the ESFJ very extroverted or could they be mistaken as introverted?

    What are some key differences between these types?
    I dated an ISFJ for 5 years. Here's the skinny...

    She could be exactly like me. I could withdraw from times, she could express at times. But, the biggest thing I acknowledge now is her need to recharge... to need ample "her time".

    That would put us at odds quite a bit in the first few years, in ignorance, not understanding that what she needed was perfectly valid for her.
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    Jorge (RiftsWRX)
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  2. #52
    Senior Member great_bay's Avatar
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    You have to remember they have all the same functions in different order.

    Fe-Si-Ne-Ti
    Si-Fe-Ti-Ne

    ESFj's are usually more upbeat and enthusiastic because of their dominate Fe. They lead with Si and than Ne thinking about past experience and the meaning of the details. They have a bit of a philosophy edge because of this. Ti is the weakness and inferior.

    ISFJ's spend their time thinking about the past experience even more than ESFJ's do since it's their dominate function. They lead with Fe and than Ti. ISFJ's are a bit more critical of themselves and their actions opposed to ESFJ's because of their third function Ti. This is probably the main difference between these types why ISFJ's is more reserved and ESFJ's is more upbeat.

  3. #53
    Senior Member riva's Avatar
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    I've noticed that ISFJ (especially females) slowly become extroverted as they mature; which slowly turns them into ESFJs.

    Never a good news that is.

    Reminds me not to marry a ISFJ I told myself that day I noticed it.
    .

  4. #54
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    I think I didn't come across this problem at all, im 100% sure about my introversion.

    The best time ever I enjoy is when I do my daily tasks or assignments alone, or planning for my future without annoyance from others.

    I even perform greatly when im alone in home or in work place, when my brother comes to home, I get distracted, when my colleague comes to the office I feel uncomfortable than before ( although that I never show dissatisfaction and feel happy to see and help them).

    And that seems slightly different from what ESFJs do, their whole life is with their friends or relative, they are so popular as well (unlike us)

  5. #55
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    Esfj look crazy looking think Donna tubs krampus from American dad
    Isfj look stoic think piccolo

  6. #56
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    ISFJ here!

    In my experience, ESFJs are more expressive of their values and feelings than ISFJs. ESFJs are more open to people and experiences in general. ESFJs are very happy with being the center of attention, where as an ISFJ would not like kind of attention at all.

    ISFJ and ESFJ both have very strong Fe (extroverted feeling) this is the nurturing function they have most striking in common. This function encourages harmonious relationships, even at their expense. The need to have everyone happy and comfortable. The caring side is more pronounced with ESFJs than ISFJs. ISFJs continously work and care for others but, it's a little less noticeable and that's how they like it.

  7. #57
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    I am an ISFJ and my mom is an ESFJ, and we couldn't be very different. I tend to be rather introverted, and don't really like group settings or talking to multiple people at the same time. My mom, on the other hand, is the person who will start talking to random strangers in the store. She and I get along quite well, but I can never see her being mistaken as an introvert. I have met other ESFJ's, and have never once thought they might be introverted. The key differences I've seen between us are in that she is incredibly outgoing, and I am the furthest from.
    Amazonian

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    Wow it sounds like you all have such convenient lives. I wish I could be just content to be around with anyone and then just to go home and cook. But noo. lol. :x

  9. #59
    Senior Member The Penguin's Avatar
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    I love ESFJs, and I usually get along much better with women than men.
    LOL that YouTube video link for the ISFJ vs ESFJ catfight. I can see myself doing that with an INTJ, yes, even if he's a guy.
    I'm not gay but I'm game to try a kiss
    ESTP 8w7-7w8-3w2 sp/sx

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  10. #60
    Member c-jade's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by tinker683 View Post
    ESFJ's I think like the company of several people and feeding off the energy that multiple conversations can have. Myself, I prefer at most 5 people and we're all on the same topic (usually one of interest to me. Otherwise I just throw in my 2 cents now and then but otherwise be quiet)
    I know this was from 6 years ago, but I really relate to this, and I am leaning towards being an ISFJ. Despite the fact that I enjoy talking to people, I really hate having a conversation with more than 4 people total. In the chaos of multiple conversations occurring at once and especially when there's a large group of people trying to hold a conversation with everyone talking over each other, I get really quiet and usually need to leave. I don't know if it's like this for other (quasi?)introverts, but I either need to be in a room with enough people in it that everyone is broken up into small groups/conversations, or I need to be in a room with 4 people max. A room of 10-25 people who are all trying to be in the same "group" makes me want to scream.

    Basically I'm agreeing with everyone that has noted that the number of people someone enjoys being around is a good indicator, rather than only looking at whether they're talkative/outgoing/etc. or not.
    the woods are lovely, dark and deep. but I have promises to keep, and miles to go before I sleep. - robert frost


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