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  1. #1
    Senior Member Saslou's Avatar
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    Default SJ's and Perfectionism

    I noticed from the SJ and dating thread that a few people had said that their standards are high. Which got me thinking about perfectionism.

    Are you a perfectionist? Is it a typical SJ trait? Are you crazy about it in some aspects of your life and not in others? Do you think this is a good thing or bad? Has it been a hindrance at times?

    What are your thoughts on this?

    Thanks.

  2. #2
    your resident asshole
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    I don't know if I'm a very big perfectionist, but I know that my SJ brother is. He's always been a perfectionist. When he was in elementary school, one of his teachers suggested that he should get psychiatric help. She was a bit of a weirdo herself, imo.

  3. #3
    Senior Member Snow Turtle's Avatar
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    No idea whether there's a correlation between MBTI and perfectionism but I do find that Js tend to be more prone to becoming perfectionistic. I'm going to assume this is because of the whole Si - Impression of the correct method or Ni - Vision of how things could be. Eitherway both have some internal idea of something that they live up to...

    Back to the main question. I'm a huge perfectionistic, but only to myself. I want to do the best I can if I'm going to do something, and I get discouraged when I don't perform well.

    The silly thing is that while I'm a perfectionistic, I'm also a procrastinator. From my perspective: Perfectionism can be taken too far and end up paralysing someone, so I'm inclined to say that it can be a very bad thing.

  4. #4
    Pronounced eye-ee-dee Eiddy's Avatar
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    Kai, I have that problem too. Although I don't see procrastinating any where near paralyzing. So I have used that in interviews when they ask for my 3 weak points. I am a perfectionist. I want the job done 110%. Good never cuts it; however if I become overwhelmed then I tend to procrastinate or gather information until the best solution appears..

    So well it is a negative, it can be a positive factor too. After all who wants a half-assed job done, right?
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  5. #5
    Senior Member WickedQueen's Avatar
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    I'll have to take the perfectionist test to figure it out.

  6. #6
    this is my winter song EJCC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kai View Post
    No idea whether there's a correlation between MBTI and perfectionism but I do find that Js tend to be more prone to becoming perfectionistic.
    Hard to say. I think, in some ways, the NTPs that I know are much more perfectionistic than I am, or than the other Js I know are.
    Back to the main question. I'm a huge perfectionistic, but only to myself. I want to do the best I can if I'm going to do something, and I get discouraged when I don't perform well.
    Me too! I'll rant about how I didn't do well at something, and sometimes people get mildly offended because they didn't do well either, and I don't mean to offend them because I'm only holding that standard to myself.

    The silly thing is that while I'm a perfectionistic, I'm also a procrastinator. From my perspective: Perfectionism can be taken too far and end up paralysing someone, so I'm inclined to say that it can be a very bad thing.
    Speaking of perfectionism paralyzing you... I read something a while ago that said that perfectionists have messier living environments because they see little to no difference between a small mess and a big mess, so they just let the whole place go.
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  7. #7
    Senior Member Saslou's Avatar
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    I am a perfectionist. Speaking to my psychologist (its ok, i am not crazy (yet)) i have realised to some degree that it did damage to my past relationship (i think anyway, could just be giving myself a hard time). I have always had to give 110%, its not that i need recognition from others, like Eiddy said, why do a half assed job. I am now however aware i need to lower my expectations of myself to enjoy life better.

    I have to work on my warped thinking process as in some areas i like things a particular way, yet in other areas where i know i have weaknesses, i really don't give a damn (example my grammar).

    I just think it is sad that i can beat myself up so much because i feel i had fallen short of my expectations, yet the job i did in the first place, wasn't that bad. *sigh*. Interesting.


    Quote Originally Posted by DisneyGeek View Post
    When he was in elementary school, one of his teachers suggested that he should get psychiatric help. She was a bit of a weirdo herself, imo.
    :yim_rolling_on_the_

    Quote Originally Posted by Kai View Post
    No idea whether there's a correlation between MBTI and perfectionism but I do find that Js tend to be more prone to becoming perfectionistic. I'm going to assume this is because of the whole Si - Impression of the correct method or Ni - Vision of how things could be. Eitherway both have some internal idea of something that they live up to...
    Interesting to know, thanks.

    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    Speaking of perfectionism paralyzing you... I read something a while ago that said that perfectionists have messier living environments because they see little to no difference between a small mess and a big mess, so they just let the whole place go.
    That's good news then for me. I have learnt to let things go. The washing up doesn't need to be done immediately after eating food. If i don't hoover up for a day, its no big deal.

  8. #8
    Senior Member wrldisquiethere's Avatar
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    With myself, yes. It's something I have to work hard to try to balance, because it can easily be debilitating.
    Si, Fe equal Fi & Ti

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  9. #9
    No moss growing on me Giggly's Avatar
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    Yeah, but not so much in my relationships with people. I do it a lot with tasks I'm performing or projects I'm involved with.

  10. #10
    Habitual Fi LineStepper JocktheMotie's Avatar
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    I would not really say it's perfectionism, but things do have to be perfectly aligned to expectations. Mine is this way, which is nice yet difficult at the same time. I like knowing what she expects, I have tangible benchmarks in which to show appreciation, apology, etc however if something is not met to satisfaction it becomes difficult for her to see past it and let herself "go."

    New situations, uncertain situations that have high chances of unexpected outcome, make her uneasy whereas for me I have no problems with them.



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