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Thread: Ask an ESTJ!

  1. #731
    Senior Member milkyway2's Avatar
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    Hmm.. well for one thing he is very logical and trusts wholly and completely in his own logic and whatever he thinks is RIGHT. You know? And he tends to just automatically disregard what other people think as dumb if it's not what he thinks. I mean, if we're having a discussion I can convince him of another viewpoint if I present it completely logically and he can step by step make sense of it. But most of the time, when we talk about something.. I end up going off on some tangent or lots at once and he gets lost. He says that it seems like I came to all these conclusions in my head from all this information and logic I use and he doesn't know how I got there, so he doesn't understand, so he can't relate, so he doesn't want to talk about it. For example, when I try to talk about psychology things, or my crazy theories about conciousness and aliens and such...... he just doesn't care and doesn't want to talk about it. It's ok because I really don't need to sit and ramble to him about all the weird stuff I think about, I do that to my coworkers. And he tries to be nice sometimes and listen and talk, but usually ends up getting frustrated if it goes on for too long... And I'm not trying to say at all that he can't understand it because he's too stupid or something. He's really smart and is taking engineering classes, he just uses his smarts for... real life applications. He doesn't like calculus and theoretical math like I do, he gets super excited when he gets to apply it to real life situations. Now I'm just rambling about interactions between INTP and ESTJ and I don't know if you have an INTP in your life and can relate lol

    ^^

    See how I do the tangent thing..

  2. #732
    lords of summer EJCC's Avatar
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    ^
    Lol, I'm doing exactly what you're describing right now, i.e. reading your rambling post and wondering how you got there from the things I said in the thread...

    Further proof of your BF's type! Right there! Most perfect thing ever.

    ...sigh... I fail...

    EJCC: "The Big Questions in my life right now: 1) What am I willing to live with? 2) What do I have to live with? 3) What can I change for the better?"
    Coriolis: "Is that the ESTJ Serenity Prayer?"

    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
    1w2/7w6/3w4 so/sx (enneagram)
    lawful good (D&D) / ravenclaw + wampus (HP) / boros legion (M:TG)
    conscientious > sensitive > serious (oldham)
    want to ask me something? go for it!

  3. #733
    Senior Member milkyway2's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    ^
    Lol, I'm doing exactly what you're describing right now, i.e. reading your rambling post and wondering how you got there from the things I said in the thread...

    Further proof of your BF's type! Right there! Most perfect thing ever.

    ...sigh... I fail...


    Hahahhahaaa wow that's hilarious. I'm going to go back and look, there were a couple more things.

  4. #734
    Senior Member milkyway2's Avatar
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    He stops bad thoughts from coming in his head. If he knows it's going to make him sad... or end up in a downward spiral, he doesn't think the thoughts. Amazing! I never learned this concept til I met him.

  5. #735
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    1. How do you start a thread? I'm new to this.

    2. Even though this may have been covered... has anyone experienced ESTJ and INFJ as a romantic relation?

  6. #736
    Iron Maiden fidelia's Avatar
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    To start a thread, you just click the New Thread icon at the top or bottom of the page, write in the blank space and press Post Quick Reply.

  7. #737
    lords of summer EJCC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sealed View Post
    Even though this may have been covered... has anyone experienced ESTJ and INFJ as a romantic relation?
    OH yeah. Loads of people. Tons and tons of INFJs on TypeC, also. I'm sure they'd be glad to talk to you about it. Although most of them had bad relationships with their respective ESTJs (it seems like), don't let that deter you, since the quality of the relationship depends on the quality of the people involved.
    EJCC: "The Big Questions in my life right now: 1) What am I willing to live with? 2) What do I have to live with? 3) What can I change for the better?"
    Coriolis: "Is that the ESTJ Serenity Prayer?"

    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
    1w2/7w6/3w4 so/sx (enneagram)
    lawful good (D&D) / ravenclaw + wampus (HP) / boros legion (M:TG)
    conscientious > sensitive > serious (oldham)
    want to ask me something? go for it!

  8. #738
    One day and the next Rainne's Avatar
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    Hey, why are you guys such hardasses? Like I'm sure not all ESTJ's are this way but the ESTJ I know keeps trying to shove his beliefs and opinions down my throat and I really don't appreciate it. You guys also seem to be very judgmental, something a SP absolutely hates.

    Also, whenever we argue, he always believes he's right and refuses to look at alternate points of view.

  9. #739
    lords of summer EJCC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rainne View Post
    Hey, why are you guys such hardasses? Like I'm sure not all ESTJ's are this way but the ESTJ I know keeps trying to shove his beliefs and opinions down my throat and I really don't appreciate it. You guys also seem to be very judgmental, something a SP absolutely hates.

    Also, whenever we argue, he always believes he's right and refuses to look at alternate points of view.
    The answer to the first sentence is the part that I bolded. We're not all hardasses. It looks to me like most ESTJs you've interacted with have been a bit unhealthy. For example, when healthy ESTJs are in arguments, they do look at other points of view... if you have evidence with you. If it looks like they're refusing to consider the other side of the argument, it's that they take debate very seriously and if/when they lose debates, they take it very personally and get embarrassed and they feel it in their soft marshmallow center but refuse to show that. In contrast, from my experience with INxJs, those types sometimes can be VERY judgmental, and REFUSE to accept factual evidence contrary to their beliefs, whereas xSTJs, technically, will change their minds when given significant, irrefutable evidence to the contrary.

    Also, if it looks like they're "trying to shove their beliefs down your throat", it's because they don't think of them as "beliefs", but instead think of them as "the right thing". They're just trying to help ... in a very untactful way, lol
    EJCC: "The Big Questions in my life right now: 1) What am I willing to live with? 2) What do I have to live with? 3) What can I change for the better?"
    Coriolis: "Is that the ESTJ Serenity Prayer?"

    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
    1w2/7w6/3w4 so/sx (enneagram)
    lawful good (D&D) / ravenclaw + wampus (HP) / boros legion (M:TG)
    conscientious > sensitive > serious (oldham)
    want to ask me something? go for it!

  10. #740
    One day and the next Rainne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    The answer to the first sentence is the part that I bolded. We're not all hardasses. It looks to me like most ESTJs you've interacted with have been a bit unhealthy. For example, when healthy ESTJs are in arguments, they do look at other points of view... if you have evidence with you. If it looks like they're refusing to consider the other side of the argument, it's that they take debate very seriously and if/when they lose debates, they take it very personally and get embarrassed and they feel it in their soft marshmallow center but refuse to show that. In contrast, from my experience with INxJs, those types sometimes can be VERY judgmental, and REFUSE to accept factual evidence contrary to their beliefs, whereas xSTJs, technically, will change their minds when given significant, irrefutable evidence to the contrary.

    Also, if it looks like they're "trying to shove their beliefs down your throat", it's because they don't think of them as "beliefs", but instead think of them as "the right thing". They're just trying to help ... in a very untactful way, lol
    Yeah I'm sorry, maybe it's just the one ESTJ I'm dealing with =(

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