User Tag List

Page 55 of 259 FirstFirst ... 545535455565765105155 ... LastLast
Results 541 to 550 of 2589

Thread: Ask an ESTJ!

  1. #541
    Junior Member Array Dailtone's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Posts
    21

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post

    ( regarding ESTJ towards ENFPs )

    I like them, but I have no idea how they manage to like everyone. I mean, they're really, really nice people (in my experience), but when they're nice to literally EVERYONE, and it's like they're friends with thousands of people, you don't exactly feel special, you know? I like feeling like I'm at least a little bit special, in a friendship. Like I'm valued. And I dunno how much I feel that with ENFPs.

    I guess it's just that they're so different from me, you know? I don't relate to them, even though I like them, and appreciate how they balance me out.
    My husband used to complain about this to me all the time when we were newly weds ( and I suspect he still feels it on occasions ).

    So here's my question : How do you make an an ESTJ feel really special, and valued and loved above others?
    (especially since his birthday is coming up soon any ideas for how to make it meaningful to him?)

  2. #542
    came back haunted Array EJCC's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    MBTI
    ESTJ
    Enneagram
    173 so/sx
    Posts
    17,386

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Dailtone View Post
    Thank goodness! Your previous words regarding your opinions on NF left me a bit concerned. My ESTJ husband is hopeless at giving me compliments or affirmations about what he is attracted to in me ( of course it's not a life or death issue, but it would be NICE ONCE IN A WHILE to HEAR ).

    I'm pretty sure , despite being what some might describe as a ditz, I possess the 3 qualities you listed. So hopefully those are the things he appreciates in me...
    Aww.... It's probably that it makes him self-conscious and awkward/embarrassed to compliment you. I know that, with me, I rarely give "affirmations" (even though I should), because I feel like they turn my life into a Hallmark card, i.e. sappy, cliched, etc. Ironically, when people say those things to me, I don't feel that way at all. And yes, I know that's hypocritical. I guess I just figure that they know how I feel... even though they might not... so it can go unsaid.

    Quote Originally Posted by Dailtone View Post
    My husband used to complain about this to me all the time when we were newly weds ( and I suspect he still feels it on occasions ).
    WHEW - I'm not crazy/alone!

    So here's my question : How do you make an an ESTJ feel really special, and valued and loved above others?
    (especially since his birthday is coming up soon any ideas for how to make it meaningful to him?)
    Little things that show that you know him really well and care about him - a gift that he's really wanted, for example - or maybe something romantic, to show what makes your relationship with him different from your relationship with anybody else.

    and it's nice enough to
    make a man
    weep, but I don't
    weep, do
    you?


    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
    1w2/7w6/3w4 so/sx (enneagram)
    lawful good (D&D) / ravenclaw + wampus (HP) / boros legion (M:TG)
    conscientious > sensitive > serious (oldham)
    want to ask me something? go for it!

  3. #543
    Writing... Array Tamske's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    MBTI
    ENTP
    Posts
    1,764

    Default

    I'm not an ESTJ, but I'm going to answer anyway. I'm already quite experienced in making a particular ESTJ feel special .

    I'm almost sure the key is TIME. Devote time to him/her. Don't go away physically and don't go away mentally (that last one is a tough one, I know).

    Ask about their interests. Even if it's a thing you are not interested in. It's at once easy and difficult. The ESTJ's interest is almost a constant.
    My husband is interested in meteorology and history. He's always been interested in meteorology and history and always will be. This gets boring after a while, at least to us NPs I guess.

    If you ask me about the same subject again after 100 times, *I* would get the feeling you're not interested in me and are relying on a stock subject in order to please me. I guess ENFPs would get the same feeling, maybe even stronger. That's why we want to avoid it. But...
    The ESTJ would not. He/she's *still* interested in that same subject.

    I look at halos and clouds. We look at a history movie and I ask about the background.
    We've even made a tradition out of it - when we have to drive a long distance, I would get my history lesson .

  4. #544
    came back haunted Array EJCC's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    MBTI
    ESTJ
    Enneagram
    173 so/sx
    Posts
    17,386

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Tamske View Post
    If you ask me about the same subject again after 100 times, *I* would get the feeling you're not interested in me and are relying on a stock subject in order to please me. I guess ENFPs would get the same feeling, maybe even stronger. That's why we want to avoid it. But...
    The ESTJ would not. He/she's *still* interested in that same subject.
    That's a really good point! Thanks for posting. I hadn't thought about that before. And thanks for your other input, too. Sometimes (but NOT ALL THE TIME), people who know ESTJs know them better than they know themselves.

    Any other questions?

    and it's nice enough to
    make a man
    weep, but I don't
    weep, do
    you?


    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
    1w2/7w6/3w4 so/sx (enneagram)
    lawful good (D&D) / ravenclaw + wampus (HP) / boros legion (M:TG)
    conscientious > sensitive > serious (oldham)
    want to ask me something? go for it!

  5. #545
    Junior Member Array Dailtone's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    MBTI
    ENFP
    Posts
    21

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    That's a really good point! Thanks for posting. I hadn't thought about that before. And thanks for your other input, too. Sometimes (but NOT ALL THE TIME), people who know ESTJs know them better than they know themselves.

    Any other questions?
    What do ESTJ's have a weakness for? That thing that always attracts them in a member of the opposite sex?

    Bwahaha

  6. #546
    Senior Member Array Max's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    MBTI
    ISTP
    Posts
    471

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Dailtone View Post
    What do ESTJ's have a weakness for? That thing that always attracts them in a member of the opposite sex?

    Bwahaha
    It seems like all I'm doing is finding flaws in members of the opposite sex. Everyone's an extreme of some sort, and I tend to overlook the good things. In terms of what is found physically attractive, that varies among the individual.

  7. #547
    A Benign Tumor Array PoprocksAndCoke's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    MBTI
    ENTP
    Socionics
    ENFp
    Posts
    614

    Default

    Why are you guys so awesome?
    "In order for the light to shine so brightly, the darkness must be present." -Francis Bacon

    "No matter how dark the moment, love and hope are always possible." -George Chakiris

  8. #548
    Member Array 4375's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    MBTI
    ESTJ
    Enneagram
    4w3
    Socionics
    ESTj
    Posts
    55

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Dailtone View Post
    What do ESTJ's have a weakness for? That thing that always attracts them in a member of the opposite sex?

    Bwahaha
    For me......I like women who have a strong sense of emotional awarness. Mostly because I don't. I just find them intriguing. I guess it is the opposites attrach thing. I also like women who don't play games. The more straight forward the better.

    Right now I am dating an INFJ. I like the similarities in values and the differences in life perspectives.

  9. #549
    Member Array 4375's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    MBTI
    ESTJ
    Enneagram
    4w3
    Socionics
    ESTj
    Posts
    55

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by PoprocksAndCoke View Post
    Why are you guys so awesome?
    I ask myself that everyday. Hahah Just kidding.

  10. #550
    Senior Member Array Max's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    MBTI
    ISTP
    Posts
    471

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by 4375 View Post
    I also like women who don't play games. The more straight forward the better.
    I can agree with this. And not just with women, but in general. I can get frustrated with people who I consider to be clowns or I can't have a serious conversation with them.

    Quote Originally Posted by PoprocksAndCoke View Post
    Why are you guys so awesome?
    My response to that is typically something along the lines of "Why do you suck so much?", but that works better in person when you can be smiling and laughing and you can see the reaction on their face. The real answer? I couldn't tell you. I've got a whole facebook fanclub dedicated to me that had 100 people join within the first 24 hours of its existence and I still don't know why.

Similar Threads

  1. [INTJ] Ask an INTJ
    By logan235711 in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 870
    Last Post: 05-22-2015, 05:04 AM
  2. [ISFJ] How to ask an ISFJ out?
    By Grungemouse in forum The SJ Guardhouse (ESFJ, ISFJ, ESTJ, ISTJ)
    Replies: 16
    Last Post: 10-08-2009, 07:04 PM
  3. [MBTItm] How do you spot an ESTJ female?
    By INTJMom in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 38
    Last Post: 12-23-2008, 01:27 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •