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Thread: Ask an ESTJ!

  1. #461
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    Quote Originally Posted by Unique View Post
    Flaunting credentials isn't really on topic, I know ESTJs accomplishing a lot less than yourself but I'm glad you're doing well. I'd also like to keep this talk about personalities and not get personal because its relatively unreliable anyway

    Firstly, are you implying that Perceiving types miss deadlines more than Judging types? This simply isn't true and no website or source that I know of claims this, there are certainly claims that Ps "cram" everything just before deadlines though

    So are you really annoyed at people who keep options open till the last min? (and there are logical reasons to do so as I've explained) or are you more annoyed at people who miss deadlines?

    Actually "missing" the deadlines isn't really something we can pin on a certain personality

    Though there are definitely different styles of meeting a deadline

    I would think that as long as the deadline is met all is well and I don't see P/J having anything to do with that

    I really can't see one style accomplishing more than the other some very rich men are perceiving types take Donald Trump for an artisan example

    I think it's narrow minded to think that J/P has anything to do with how productive or accomplished someone can be and most Ps that are accomplished would say their perceiving played a large part in their brilliance
    Well I was giving facts to support the theory here...and to tell you the truth, I know a lot of people who missed project deadlines because they kept their options open. I do agree keeping your options open is a good thing, but when you don't make any progress towards achieving your goals, it's more of a bad thing than is a good thing.

  2. #462
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    ESTJs, how do you guys like to be approached if someone wants to talk to you? Do you prefer if someone says "Is this a convenient time for you to talk?" or "Hey, we need to talk."?

    I would prefer you say "Is this a convenient time for you to talk" since you shouldn't treat your teacher like you treat your friends

    If someone sends you a lot of sport-releated e-mails, or thank-you letters, do you guys feel obligated to respond?

    I do feel obligated to respond to e-mails, letters, and things like that because I hate when people ignore me or don't respond to my inquiries and I'm not a hypocrite. However, if you send too many e-mails regarding similar materials and I don't have time, I will probably invite you to have a face to face chat after class or something.

    Do you like to hangout with your family more than your friends?

    I would choose my friends because it's sort of weird hanging out with my family...at least at this point in my life anyways

    If you are married, do you like to introduce your spouse or family to a friend or acquaintance? Or do you feel insecure about it?

    N/A since I'm not married.

    How would you feel if someone that has once embarrassed you, informally approaches you and says something like "I'm sorry for embarrassing you the other night".. How would you respond? Would you blush? Would you say something like "thank you for apologizing."?

    I usually tell that someone not to worry about it if he or she didn't mean to embarrass me. If person embarrasses me on purpose, I demand an apology.

    What do you guys think of INFJs?

    I'm not very familiar with the personality type...so I can't really tell you.

    What is the best way for a non-athletic student to impress an ESTJ physical education teacher?

    You know what it depends on the person...I would guess to be good at sports since you are getting evaluated on your physical abilities. Even if you aren't good at sports, I would be impressed if you show me that you're doing your best and working hard to improve yourself.

    I'm sorry if I caused any trouble.. I'm just eager!

    Don't apologize because this thread is made to answer your questions. I can't sleep anyways, so it's all good.

  3. #463
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    Quote Originally Posted by T-Guy View Post
    Well I was giving facts to support the theory here...and to tell you the truth, I know a lot of people who missed project deadlines because they kept their options open. I do agree keeping your options open is a good thing, but when you don't make any progress towards achieving your goals, it's more of a bad thing than is a good thing.
    Alright I mean no offense by this but you are clearly not understanding my point so I have nothing further.

  4. #464
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    Hello, first i must say I didnt read all 47 pages of this thread so these questions may have been asked before. (I made it up to about pg27) Im not clear if its possible to search for something within a thread. Anyway, if these questions have been asked, i apologise, just quoting past posts would be great, thanks.

    1. What types would ESTJs be attracted to in a romantic relationship? What specific personality traits would endear these types to ESTJs, and why??

    2. Are ESTJs likely to like people who lack quickness/punctuality in doing work, but are caring, empathetic, friendly, occasionally and appropriately serious (esp. as in emotionally mature) individuals? Would you let these people into your 'inner circle'?

    3. WHY are ESTJs so driven to accomplishment/completion of things??? What goes through your minds, what's the thought process? (eg. "i have to finish this because ...?")

    4. (perhaps this qn is similar to #1) What kinds of people are ESTJs likely to admit into their inner circle, to become seriously good friends with (the kind with whom you become fiercely "You can count on me"-guardian-like when they cry, and with whom you are just yourself and can open up about more emotional problems you experience)? What personality traits cause you to open up to these people/trust these people with such important things, and why?

    Thank you, this is a greatt thread.

  5. #465
    came back haunted Array EJCC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Unique View Post
    Alright I mean no offense by this but you are clearly not understanding my point so I have nothing further.
    Don't give up! After all, I don't know if you noticed, but I answered your questions too, so you might find help there.

    Quote Originally Posted by Twixt View Post
    Hello, first i must say I didnt read all 47 pages of this thread so these questions may have been asked before. (I made it up to about pg27) Im not clear if its possible to search for something within a thread. Anyway, if these questions have been asked, i apologise, just quoting past posts would be great, thanks.
    No problem at all

    1. What types would ESTJs be attracted to in a romantic relationship? What specific personality traits would endear these types to ESTJs, and why??
    It really, REALLY depends. I've seen/heard of ESTJs having romantic relationships with a LOT of types. I haven't heard of an ESTJ pairing with another SJ, but besides that... yeah. Generally, I'd say that ESTJs, like anyone, want an SO who balances them out, but doesn't clash with them. Here's what I want in a guy that I think other ESTJs would probably also want in an SO:
    - Someone who agrees with them in political and, depending on the ESTJ, "moral" issues (and if they're more closed-minded, then they'll want someone who has the same religion as them. Me, personally, I'm okay with whatever religion a guy has as long as he doesn't mess with my religion.)
    - Someone who will listen to what they have to say, but will also fill the silence
    - Someone who will respect my (occasional) need for space, e.g. when I'm really upset and need to be alone and cool off
    - Someone trustworthy
    - Someone genuine
    - Someone who understands them

    Now, I personally would put "compatible sense of humor" on the list, but I dunno about humorless ESTJs, you know?

    2. Are ESTJs likely to like people who lack quickness/punctuality in doing work, but are caring, empathetic, friendly, occasionally and appropriately serious (esp. as in emotionally mature) individuals? Would you let these people into your 'inner circle'?
    Depends on whether they're coworkers or just friends. In a work environment, I might like them personally, but their work habits would piss me off to the point that the verdict would be unclear. (This is ESPECIALLY TRUE if they're lower ranking than me.) But if it's not work related, then sure, I could put aside their work habits and be their friend. I have friends like that, including an ENTP and an ESFP, who are very close and who I could tell almost anything to. But I don't work with them...

    3. WHY are ESTJs so driven to accomplishment/completion of things??? What goes through your minds, what's the thought process? (eg. "i have to finish this because ...?")
    An example:
    I have a test. I have to get a good grade on the test. Why? Because I need to get a good grade in the class. Why? Because I would be horrifically disappointed in myself if I did any worse than a certain grade.

    I have high standards for myself. I judge myself based on how well I manage to meet (or come close to meeting) those standards.

    But none of this is a thought process, really. It's all internalized. The thought process is probably this: "I have to study for this test. I need to get an A. I HAVE to get an A." It's pretty robotic - I give myself an assignment, and I just complete it.

    4. (perhaps this qn is similar to #1) What kinds of people are ESTJs likely to admit into their inner circle, to become seriously good friends with (the kind with whom you become fiercely "You can count on me"-guardian-like when they cry, and with whom you are just yourself and can open up about more emotional problems you experience)? What personality traits cause you to open up to these people/trust these people with such important things, and why?
    Honestly, and this is kind of embarrassing, almost all NFs who are nice to me bring out this reaction. An extreme example: I've only known my roommate (an INFJ) for three weeks, and I ALREADY treat her like this. But then again, we hit it off right away. We have common interests, and she seems to genuinely care about me. Plus, her dad died this past week, and I think that strengthened my feelings of protectiveness.

    But yeah, those are the general qualifiers (for me): General chemistry, shared interests, them being nice to me, and them seeming to care (genuinely) about me.

    Thank you, this is a greatt thread.
    Glad you like it. I certainly do


    btw... 47 PAGES, GUYS!!!

    and it's nice enough to
    make a man
    weep, but I don't
    weep, do
    you?


    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
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    lawful good (D&D) / ravenclaw + wampus (HP) / boros legion (M:TG)
    conscientious > sensitive > serious (oldham)
    want to ask me something? go for it!

  6. #466
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    what is it like to rule the world?

  7. #467
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    Think of all the educating you guys have done! Thanks for being the host EJCC and for any of you other ESTJs who have contributed.

  8. #468
    came back haunted Array EJCC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Adoamros View Post
    what is it like to rule the world?
    I'll let you know after I stage that coup that I've been planning...

    Seriously, though, it doesn't feel like anything, because you take it for granted. It's not exactly on my mind all the time.

    and it's nice enough to
    make a man
    weep, but I don't
    weep, do
    you?


    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
    1w2/7w6/3w4 so/sx (enneagram)
    lawful good (D&D) / ravenclaw + wampus (HP) / boros legion (M:TG)
    conscientious > sensitive > serious (oldham)
    want to ask me something? go for it!

  9. #469
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    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    Don't give up! After all, I don't know if you noticed, but I answered your questions too, so you might find help there.
    Yes thank you. Your answers were exactly what I was after. T-Guy and I just got off on a bit of a tangent but since I don't think it was really progressing and was not getting a satisfactory a response I have nothing further

    It's not my mission to put over confident ESTJs in their place anyway

    The "facts" he talks about to support this "theory" are simply his own credentials which in the big scheme of things are actually not that impressive but I didn't want to make it personal for that reason I'm not out to make people feel small

    There is no solid proof that has been shown to me for the claims being made

  10. #470
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    Thanks! That was great.

    An example:
    I have a test. I have to get a good grade on the test. Why? Because I need to get a good grade in the class. Why? Because I would be horrifically disappointed in myself if I did any worse than a certain grade.

    I have high standards for myself. I judge myself based on how well I manage to meet (or come close to meeting) those standards.

    But none of this is a thought process, really. It's all internalized. The thought process is probably this: "I have to study for this test. I need to get an A. I HAVE to get an A." It's pretty robotic - I give myself an assignment, and I just complete it.
    Well. This may sound pretty strange hahaha. Were you born like that? Was it ALWAYS natural for you to think/behave this way?

    What type are your parents? What effects do you think their personalities have had on how you turned out!

    Do you think its possible or likely for two P parents to have a J child, especially an extroverted judger (E__J)?


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