User Tag List

First 77127167175176177178179187227 Last

Results 1,761 to 1,770 of 2590

Thread: Ask an ESTJ!

  1. #1761
    Superwoman Red Herring's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    MBTI
    INTP
    Enneagram
    5w4 sp/sx
    Posts
    5,418

    Default

    Big fat LOL at the essay!
    The good life is one inspired by love and guided by knowledge. Neither love without knowledge, nor knowledge without love can produce a good life. - Bertrand Russell
    A herring's blog
    Johari / Nohari

  2. #1762
    inside the lines EJCC's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    MBTI
    ESTJ
    Enneagram
    173 so/sx
    Posts
    17,932

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Giggly View Post
    So why not just pick Type B?
    Because some type A people are on the chiller side. I'm not so chill that there couldn't possibly be Type A people chiller than me.
    Quote Originally Posted by Red Herring View Post
    Big fat LOL at the essay!


    Quote Originally Posted by Nørrsken impersonating EJCC
    It's strange. I keep banning morons, but they keep signing up? What is this?
    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
    1w2/7w6/3w4 so/sx (enneagram)
    lawful good (D&D) / ravenclaw + wampus (HP) / boros legion (M:TG)
    conscientious > sensitive > serious (oldham)
    want to ask me something? go for it!

  3. #1763

    Default

    do estj tend to not want to talk with you if they are under a lot of stress?

  4. #1764
    inside the lines EJCC's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    MBTI
    ESTJ
    Enneagram
    173 so/sx
    Posts
    17,932

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by azulatheavatar View Post
    do estj tend to not want to talk with you if they are under a lot of stress?
    ESTJs withdraw from people when they're very stressed out. You can tell an ESTJ is going through something intense when they're suddenly quiet and distant from the outside world. It isn't that they don't want to talk to you (although if they're in super-Te-deadline-mode, they might be avoiding you for the sake of getting the job done without distraction), but when under stress they're too focused on themselves and their own stress, for regular communication to even cross their minds.
    Quote Originally Posted by Nørrsken impersonating EJCC
    It's strange. I keep banning morons, but they keep signing up? What is this?
    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
    1w2/7w6/3w4 so/sx (enneagram)
    lawful good (D&D) / ravenclaw + wampus (HP) / boros legion (M:TG)
    conscientious > sensitive > serious (oldham)
    want to ask me something? go for it!

  5. #1765

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    ESTJs withdraw from people when they're very stressed out. You can tell an ESTJ is going through something intense when they're suddenly quiet and distant from the outside world. It isn't that they don't want to talk to you (although if they're in super-Te-deadline-mode, they might be avoiding you for the sake of getting the job done without distraction), but they're too distracted by themselves and their own stress, for regular communication to come naturally to them anymore.
    just to clarify you say "suddenly distant" as in one day they are talking to one the phone with me and asking me to hang out and then the next day or so they don't call when they usually always make an effort to do so?

  6. #1766
    inside the lines EJCC's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    MBTI
    ESTJ
    Enneagram
    173 so/sx
    Posts
    17,932

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by azulatheavatar View Post
    just to clarify you say "suddenly distant" as in one day they are talking to one the phone with me and asking me to hang out and then the next day or so they don't call when they usually always make an effort to do so?
    Yep, that's exactly it! If other ESTJs are like me, then they're good at remaining "normal" under mild to medium (or even pretty intense) levels of stress -- but there's always a breaking point, and it's only at that point that the accidentally self-imposed isolation mode turns on.
    Quote Originally Posted by Nørrsken impersonating EJCC
    It's strange. I keep banning morons, but they keep signing up? What is this?
    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
    1w2/7w6/3w4 so/sx (enneagram)
    lawful good (D&D) / ravenclaw + wampus (HP) / boros legion (M:TG)
    conscientious > sensitive > serious (oldham)
    want to ask me something? go for it!

  7. #1767
    Row row row your boat SD45T-2's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    MBTI
    ESTJ
    Enneagram
    1w2 so/sp
    Posts
    2,634

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by SilkRoad View Post
    @EJCC, I love you guys (xSTJs generally ) but I do need to ask...are the vast majority of you workaholics?
    I wouldn't say the vast majority of STJs are workaholics, but it's plausible that the vast majority of workaholics are STJs.

    I wrestled during junior high and some of high school. After the first few years I got serious about it. I lost about 25lbs and spent most of my free time jogging, lifting weights, doing pushups, etc. I had the best attendance for wrestling practice and I think it's safe to say I was one of the most dedicated guys on the team. I was practically like Matthew Modine in Vision Quest. Eventually I managed to become a thoroughly mediocre wrestler. Then my right elbow went kaput. So much for that.

    I kind of admire workaholics, because they get so much done, but they worry me too. I worry about them working themselves to death - and also, in terms of friendships or relationships, I kind of wonder if I'd always come low down the list after their work.
    That can happen. It's one of the themes of Heat, which I mentioned to you awhile back.
    1w2-6w5-3w2 so/sp

    "I took one those personality tests. It came back negative." - Dan Mintz

  8. #1768
    i love skylights's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    6w7 so/sx
    Socionics
    EII Ne
    Posts
    7,836

    Default

    What are the best ways of demonstrating love to and sharing intimacy with an ESTJ? Of course that will vary a bit from individual to individual, but maybe there are some shared tendencies...? As an NF obviously I go to fuzzy-conceptual methods, like the ideas represented in certain songs or poems or expressed in artwork, but I'm trying to figure out how best to "translate" that without losing authenticity...

  9. #1769

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    What are the best ways of demonstrating love to and sharing intimacy with an ESTJ? Of course that will vary a bit from individual to individual, but maybe there are some shared tendencies...? As an NF obviously I go to fuzzy-conceptual methods, like the ideas represented in certain songs or poems or expressed in artwork, but I'm trying to figure out how best to "translate" that without losing authenticity...
    Demonstrating love: Do the dishes. Seriously. It's that simple.

    Sharing intimacy: Watch his choice of T.V. together. Seriously. It's that simple.


  10. #1770
    inside the lines EJCC's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    MBTI
    ESTJ
    Enneagram
    173 so/sx
    Posts
    17,932

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    What are the best ways of demonstrating love to and sharing intimacy with an ESTJ? Of course that will vary a bit from individual to individual, but maybe there are some shared tendencies...? As an NF obviously I go to fuzzy-conceptual methods, like the ideas represented in certain songs or poems or expressed in artwork, but I'm trying to figure out how best to "translate" that without losing authenticity...
    Quote Originally Posted by mia_infp View Post
    Demonstrating love: Do the dishes. Seriously. It's that simple.

    Sharing intimacy: Watch his choice of T.V. together. Seriously. It's that simple.

    I pretty much agree, about demonstrating love. Just doing something for the ESTJ that shows that you're thinking of them, and that you've been paying attention to what's been going on in their life. Maybe surprising them with an unexpected gift (e.g. making them or buying them a favorite food?), or, I guess, doing the dishes? With the explanation of "I know you've had a lot on your plate lately..." (Pun unintended )

    Regarding intimacy, watching a movie etc is a great way to share wordless intimacy -- I agree. And that would be the best way to have a longer-lasting intimate experience with them. (Not the best word choice, but you know what I mean.) If you wanted to share intimacy with them verbally, I wouldn't expect that moment to last long! Or at least, I'd expect a longer period of silent intimacy to follow the short period of spoken intimacy. Example: if you ask the ESTJ what's been going on in their lives, and the ESTJ opens up quietly, briefly, and minimally, showing their Fi as much as they're comfortable with, and then you respond with equivalent opening up, and the two of you respond to one another -- the ESTJ is going to feel a lasting moment with you as a result of that, a moment of mental unity, I guess. And maybe it's because I've ended up slightly more introspective than the average ESTJ, because of how interested I am in personality psychology, that my preferred moments of silent intimacy are the ones preceded by verbally opening up. Or it could be because I'm generally resistant towards feeling mentally united with someone until they've told me explicitly how they feel... which could mean either a lack of trust in other people, or a lack of trust in my own ability to read people.

    I dunno! I'm thinking out loud. I hope some of that helped.
    Quote Originally Posted by Nørrsken impersonating EJCC
    It's strange. I keep banning morons, but they keep signing up? What is this?
    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
    1w2/7w6/3w4 so/sx (enneagram)
    lawful good (D&D) / ravenclaw + wampus (HP) / boros legion (M:TG)
    conscientious > sensitive > serious (oldham)
    want to ask me something? go for it!

Similar Threads

  1. [INTJ] Ask an INTJ
    By logan235711 in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 870
    Last Post: 05-22-2015, 05:04 AM
  2. [ISFJ] How to ask an ISFJ out?
    By Grungemouse in forum The SJ Guardhouse (ESFJ, ISFJ, ESTJ, ISTJ)
    Replies: 16
    Last Post: 10-08-2009, 07:04 PM
  3. [MBTItm] How do you spot an ESTJ female?
    By INTJMom in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 38
    Last Post: 12-23-2008, 01:27 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts