I think it's cool that ESTJ's seem to have such concrete thoughts. When a subject comes up, like for instance, finding ways to work with people we find unpleasant, I automatically think of a theoretical person that I would find unpleasant. Heck even if I *meet* an unpleasant person I classify them as an abstract. An ESTJ is thinking of one specific unpleasant person, and probably the one that pissed her off yesterday. It's like watching the engine run in a car with the hood up.
I guess what I was talking was code speak. I don't know how common this is with ESTJs, but my ESTJ will drop 'hints' instead of out right saying things. It seems to her referring to something indirectly is a non confrontational way of making a point or saying something that she would otherwise feel uncomfortable saying. Unfortunately you have to drop an anvil on me to get something like that through, it took me by surprise when I realized this.However, that differs from venting, because I still mean everything I'm saying - all the reasons are still valid (except for select occasions, and usually the statement will be followed by "Wait, that's not even remotely true. Sorry about that"). They're just not in order of importance.
It also had me wondering if she was taking some of my random mutterings as some sort of hints or code speak, and then I started getting really worried about what I talk about. It would account for some of the misunderstood behavior.