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  1. #1
    Senior Member Saslou's Avatar
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    Default SJ's as complainers.

    So i am currenly reading a very interesting book which was recommended by someone from this site.

    'Survival games personalities play'.

    Its about the games we play in life in order to survive.

    We SJ's play the Complain game apparantly.
    The six variants are invalid, worried, doormat, poor me, depressed and nag.

    Invalid - Complaining of real aches and pains.

    Worried - plagued with terrible worries and fears of bad things that may happen.

    Doormat - Allowing themselves to be stepped on by others while behaving as lowly servants.

    Poor me - complain loudly and often about put upon they are.

    Depressed - filled with sadness, everythings dark and dreary with no hope.

    Nag - Harps on others what they should and should not be feeling, thinking and/or doing.

    This book also looks at the other 3 types, NT, SP and NF's so they have their own problems as well.

    I was just curious though, Can you relate to the above?
    “I made you take time to look at what I saw and when you took time to really notice my flower, you hung all your associations with flowers on my flower and you write about my flower as if I think and see what you think and see—and I don't.”
    ― Georgia O'Keeffe

  2. #2
    Senior Member Saslou's Avatar
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    I do see how in my time i have used each of those to 'survive' but i wouldn't say to extremes.

    Invalid - I used to joke all the time that i was a hypocondriac, it was more in jest though.

    Worried - My children when they were younger. I always worried about them.

    Doormat - Big time when it comes to relationships, I put up with crap that i shouldn't. My best friend yesterday took the piss, i am not happy. I will not do it again especially because i now know that people keep on taking the piss out of me.

    Poor me- This is what i find funny. I dont look for sympathy when i have problems, usually i dont want to tell anyone. When i do, it doesn't feel like a 'poor me', i just find expressing myself and hearing it out loud, well it puts things into perspective for me. *shrugs*.

    Depressed - I think this comes down to situations more than anything else. I have been depressed a few times in the past and even been given medication for it. Both times however, i stopped taking them. When you hit the bottom, its only you who can climb back up.

    Do i see myself as a complainer?

    Well it looks like i am complaining now doesn't it, lol. I just express how i feel instead of keeping it in. I don't think it is a bad thing.

    “I made you take time to look at what I saw and when you took time to really notice my flower, you hung all your associations with flowers on my flower and you write about my flower as if I think and see what you think and see—and I don't.”
    ― Georgia O'Keeffe

  3. #3
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    This is interesting Saslou. Would you mind posting the games of the other types, as well?

    I don't know about all of these, as I am not an SJ. But I can say with certainty that the ESTJs in my life use the Poor Me quite a bit. Very funny stuff!!

    For instance, I have a friend with a lot of roommates. She loves to be home looking for little things to fix. If a picture is a bit crooked, she fixes it with a sigh. If a roommate even leaves a glass in the sink, all you hear about is how everyone leaves all the housework to her. How no one does anything around the house. How she has to do everything... It's hilarious!! (well, only because I don't live with her...) We all used to look at her like she was insane, but now I realize that she actually likes being "needed" to do the little things and maybe just wants a thank you? I don't know.

  4. #4
    IRL is not real Cimarron's Avatar
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    I don't know, I guess I complain a lot when under stress. And my friends know it, so I use that as a joke sometimes. But I also complain seriously.

    I'm a whiner.

  5. #5
    heart on fire
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    Quote Originally Posted by jenocyde View Post
    This is interesting Saslou. Would you mind posting the games of the other types, as well?
    I found this online when I was thinking about purchasing the book.

    Go half way down this page and someone already did all the work and typed out all the information about the different types.

    ...

  6. #6
    reborn PeaceBaby's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jenocyde View Post
    We all used to look at her like she was insane, but now I realize that she actually likes being "needed" to do the little things and maybe just wants a thank you? I don't know.
    I'm thread-stalking you it seems jenocyde!

    I agree with the desire to get a "thank-you". SJ's certainly do like to be appreciated for the tasks they perform. So I do try to notice and say thanks a lot myself, since I have quite a number of them in my life.

    I think that completing little chores is an SJ's way of saying "I love you"...

  7. #7
    your resident asshole
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    Oh, I tend to complain a lot. Plus, in real life, I don't have very much to say and complaining helps me to make conversation.

  8. #8
    Senior Member Saslou's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DisneyGeek View Post
    Oh, I tend to complain a lot. Plus, in real life, I don't have very much to say and complaining helps me to make conversation.
    LOL .. Oh i love your honesty.
    “I made you take time to look at what I saw and when you took time to really notice my flower, you hung all your associations with flowers on my flower and you write about my flower as if I think and see what you think and see—and I don't.”
    ― Georgia O'Keeffe

  9. #9
    your resident asshole
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    Quote Originally Posted by saslou View Post
    LOL .. Oh i love your honesty.
    Thank you thank you. *bows*

  10. #10
    half mystic, half skeksis jenocyde's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by heart View Post
    I found this online when I was thinking about purchasing the book.
    Thanks!!

    Quote Originally Posted by PeaceBaby View Post
    I'm thread-stalking you it seems jenocyde!

    I agree with the desire to get a "thank-you". SJ's certainly do like to be appreciated for the tasks they perform. So I do try to notice and say thanks a lot myself, since I have quite a number of them in my life.

    I think that completing little chores is an SJ's way of saying "I love you"...
    Haha. I don't mind being watched!

    Yeah, I try to thank them as much as possible. But it's hard to thank someone for doing something I don't care about and didn't request... ah well, everyone has their thing. I'm no walk in the park, either.

    Quote Originally Posted by DisneyGeek View Post
    Oh, I tend to complain a lot. Plus, in real life, I don't have very much to say and complaining helps me to make conversation.
    It is nice to see this honesty.
    But how does this help you make conversation?


    EDIT: Wow, I see a bunch of that rational stuff in me. *scary*

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