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Thread: ESFJ gone wrong

  1. #11
    Senior Member Saslou's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Grand Chameleon View Post

    She did test as an ESFJ, but she made it a very clear point she wanted to be unique. Perhaps her erratic, nonconformist behavior is testament to that? I remain unsure in that field.

    I too, am sorry. I am mixed between genuine sorrow and "shake-your-head" pity. The situations she gets herself in are so easily remediable, but without tact and self-reflection she will forever be in this rut.
    Lmao .. I have always considered myself as unique (but then aren't we all) i am now looking at the possibility of just being an odd ball .. erratic and nonconformist behaviour could maybe be misconstrued as boundless energy and the need to do something NOW.

    How old is she just out of curiosity?
    “I made you take time to look at what I saw and when you took time to really notice my flower, you hung all your associations with flowers on my flower and you write about my flower as if I think and see what you think and see—and I don't.”
    ― Georgia O'Keeffe

  2. #12
    Senior Member wrldisquiethere's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by toonia View Post
    Did she actually test as an ESFJ? Of course any type can display extreme behaviors like that, but ESFJs are some of the most socially responsible people of all the types. As generalizations about types go, I think they feel more beholden to stay within the social boundaries agreed upon as fair by everyone.

    I'm sorry to hear about it at any rate.
    That's exactly what I was going to say. It seems like really abnormal behavior for an ESFJ to me.

    Quote Originally Posted by The Grand Chameleon View Post
    She did test as an ESFJ, but she made it a very clear point she wanted to be unique. Perhaps her erratic, nonconformist behavior is testament to that? I remain unsure in that field.

    I too, am sorry. I am mixed between genuine sorrow and "shake-your-head" pity. The situations she gets herself in are so easily remediable, but without tact and self-reflection she will forever be in this rut.
    I have at times been determined to prove to the world that I'm unique, but that's diminished some as I've gotten older. I've realized that most people like to claim that they're unique. I personally got to the point where I just didn't see the need to "prove" myself and my uniqueness any longer. I am definitely unique in some ways and others can attest to that, but overall I won't be willing to stray too far from the social norm (particularly if it is offensive to others) or to compromise my values. I haven't known a lot of ESFJ's, but the ones I have known are very responsible and very aware of what is and is not appropriate for behavior and social situations.
    Si, Fe equal Fi & Ti

    "I had a bag of Fritos, they were Texas grilled Fritos. These Fritos had grill marks on them. They remind me of summer, when we used to fire up the barbeque and throw down some Fritos. I can still see my dad with the apron on. Better flip that Frito, dad, you know how I like it." -Mitch Hedberg

  3. #13
    Senior Member The Grand Chameleon's Avatar
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    erratic and nonconformist behaviour could maybe be misconstrued as boundless energy and the need to do something NOW.
    Oh, I apologize; I feel my thoughts have been conveyed improperly. It wasn't my intention to equate "erratic and nonconformist behavior" to being a testament to the ESFJ type. She had a powerful desire to stand out, which is why I feel she fell out of "standard" ESFJ behavior (or IMO, standard human behavior).

    How old is she just out of curiosity?
    Nearing the mid-twenties, I believe.

    I have at times been determined to prove to the world that I'm unique, but that's diminished some as I've gotten older. I've realized that most people like to claim that they're unique. I personally got to the point where I just didn't see the need to "prove" myself and my uniqueness any longer. I am definitely unique in some ways and others can attest to that, but overall I won't be willing to stray too far from the social norm (particularly if it is offensive to others) or to compromise my values. I haven't known a lot of ESFJ's, but the ones I have known are very responsible and very aware of what is and is not appropriate for behavior and social situations.
    You and saslou are painting a very nice picture of the ESFJ. It's been very insightful, and I'd like to express my genuine gratitude for helping me clear up the type confusion. It'd be safe to dub this one ESFJ female I know as a deviant, no? =)
    "In the game of chess, you can never let your opponent see your pieces."

  4. #14
    Senior Member Saslou's Avatar
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    Please don't apologise ..

    Maybe she just needs to get her act together. Then she'll become a more rounded individual regardless of what her type is.
    “I made you take time to look at what I saw and when you took time to really notice my flower, you hung all your associations with flowers on my flower and you write about my flower as if I think and see what you think and see—and I don't.”
    ― Georgia O'Keeffe

  5. #15
    Senior Member wrldisquiethere's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Grand Chameleon View Post
    It'd be safe to dub this one ESFJ female I know as a deviant, no? =)
    I believe so.
    Si, Fe equal Fi & Ti

    "I had a bag of Fritos, they were Texas grilled Fritos. These Fritos had grill marks on them. They remind me of summer, when we used to fire up the barbeque and throw down some Fritos. I can still see my dad with the apron on. Better flip that Frito, dad, you know how I like it." -Mitch Hedberg

  6. #16
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    deviant....or ESFP

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