Thought it might be fun to answer some of Tea Party's questions since there are several of us ISTJ gals here.
I'm going to answer in reverse. I'm drawn to people who are shy or just introverted, I really loathe overbearing loud people. I do not like being hit on, I like to be in control. If I want you, you will know about it!What qualities do ISTJs most gravitate to in others? (In regards to a romantic relationship.)
How important is another person's physical appearance to an ISTJ?
How do ISTJs respond to unrequited love?
Are ISTJs generally self-conscious/afraid of seeming creepy when talking to someone they are interested in romantically? Do they frequently (or ever) worry that their person of interest does not like them or does not trust them?
Are ISTJs at all empathetic to other people who are shy around THEM?
I'm very self conscious about seeming creepy! And yes, worry all the time that they don't like me. I've learned to read the signs better now but I still have to consciously check reality and talk myself out of freaking out "aaargh help they hate me, I should just leave them alone!!".
Unrequited love, I really dunno, I'm usually the unrequited one. Certainly if someone tries to pick me up and I'm not interested, I don't stuff around. I never play games and I respect someone who takes a clear no for an answer and walks away.
Physical appearance... well, there are two aspects to this I guess. Firstly, I've fallen for guys of all shapes and sizes. I can be attracted to just about anyone if I get turned on to them as a person. Having said that... if I was designing a guy... I would know what I prefer. There's something about a man with fine bones that drives me crazy. I like them skinny, or skinny with muscle, like my man, hubba hubba!! He's so pretty he makes me go cross eyed. Pass the smelling salts!!
Qualities I gravitate to for a relationship... Well, after much trial and far more error, I realised I need someone emotionally literate, with a really caring nature. ISTPs, INTPs etc, while hot, make me incredibly miserable in a relationship, like I am emotionally starving to death. So I must have an F. I don't like extraverts or strong Fe, and I don't like my fellow SJs, so that leaves me with ISFPs, INFPs and INFJs. So, when I'm looking for a guy I'm scanning all the time for some sign of these more gentle, unconventional, relational guys, and not your average Aussie dickhead.