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  1. #11
    Pronounced eye-ee-dee Eiddy's Avatar
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    Oh about happiness and hell bent on destroying it. That was a biggie for me before too.

    Then one day I decided I deserve to be happy and I quit looking for that grey cloud that seemed to lurk around every corner.

    You deserve it too.

    A little suggestion if I may. Take 5 minutes everyday just to do something you love, just for yourself. Reminding yourself that you deserve this and the thinking well I had listened a lot to Eckhart Tollie for quite awhile on Oprah.com downloaded the MP3's to my computer and transferred to my MP3 player as I went and came from work. Meditation works wonders, if I can sit still long enough.

    Ok enough of me rambling..... Hope to keep in touch.. ~hugs~
    Johari / Nohari

    Enneagram 1w2/Lifepath 1/first zodiac sign Aries/first Chinese zodiac sign RAT/first born in my siblings of 3. Did I forget to mention first?

    Independent Director

  2. #12
    Senior Member Saslou's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eiddy View Post
    Oh about happiness and hell bent on destroying it. That was a biggie for me before too.

    Then one day I decided I deserve to be happy and I quit looking for that grey cloud that seemed to lurk around every corner.

    You deserve it too.

    A little suggestion if I may. Take 5 minutes everyday just to do something you love, just for yourself. Reminding yourself that you deserve this and the thinking well I had listened a lot to Eckhart Tollie for quite awhile on Oprah.com downloaded the MP3's to my computer and transferred to my MP3 player as I went and came from work. Meditation works wonders, if I can sit still long enough.

    Ok enough of me rambling..... Hope to keep in touch.. ~hugs~
    I have just joined this site at a emotional time .. I have never had my heart broken before (not bad for 30yrs old) and i am going to get a divorce .. All expectations have gone out of the window .. As my doctor told me yesterday "Getting a divorce is so stressful, you need to mourn .. You just have extra to deal with, you will not be living in another country, your plans have now changed due to someone else" .. i liked her brutal honesty but jeez love .. could of worded it a little different ..

    I do stop and smell the flowers every now and again .. and just BE .. Its just a process that i am unable to push .. i just need to deal with it and take each day as it comes .. Maybe i was meant to go through hell so i could find some peace within myself .. Who knows .. But i feel great today (sleeping tablets) .. and i got myself a haircut .. HE didnt like me having short hair, so i got it cut really short today because i liked it .. It is liberating ..

    From every bad comes some good .. I believe i deserve some happiness and not in the form of love or a man .. but Sarah happiness ..
    “I made you take time to look at what I saw and when you took time to really notice my flower, you hung all your associations with flowers on my flower and you write about my flower as if I think and see what you think and see—and I don't.”
    ― Georgia O'Keeffe

  3. #13
    Pronounced eye-ee-dee Eiddy's Avatar
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    Yes exactly.. love takes time to heal when your feeling so bad ~Whitney

    I was devastated after my first divorce, but I have to tell ya. Every time I see a man, abuse or negative. I thank God everyday for helping me get over him and finally when he wished he could come back. I knew that for me it was totally over. Oh about the God part I am spiritual, but never religious.

    I think when we can see ourselves, driving down the Pacific highway with a dog in the back of a Red Jeep driving off into the sunset. That is freedom and happiness.
    Johari / Nohari

    Enneagram 1w2/Lifepath 1/first zodiac sign Aries/first Chinese zodiac sign RAT/first born in my siblings of 3. Did I forget to mention first?

    Independent Director

  4. #14
    Senior Member Saslou's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eiddy View Post
    Yes exactly.. love takes time to heal when your feeling so bad ~Whitney

    I was devastated after my first divorce, but I have to tell ya. Every time I see a man, abuse or negative. I thank God everyday for helping me get over him and finally when he wished he could come back. I knew that for me it was totally over. Oh about the God part I am spiritual, but never religious.

    I think when we can see ourselves, driving down the Pacific highway with a dog in the back of a Red Jeep driving off into the sunset. That is freedom and happiness.
    I understand what you are saying .. i also am a spiritual person although not religious .. I suppose you have to accept the bad so you can truly appreciate the good .. The red jeep driving off in the sunset, now that does sound like happiness and true freedom .. Ahhhhh .. Thank you for your honesty ..
    “I made you take time to look at what I saw and when you took time to really notice my flower, you hung all your associations with flowers on my flower and you write about my flower as if I think and see what you think and see—and I don't.”
    ― Georgia O'Keeffe

  5. #15
    Pronounced eye-ee-dee Eiddy's Avatar
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    Yikes I meant abusive. There is one thing I have noticed lately at least here in Egypt. It seems everyone always has this thing about girls and their goals should be (1) get married and (2) to have kids. Someone mentioned to my 10 year old about her being a good wife when she grows up, since she made donuts and went with me to work.

    I told him "Nah, she doesn't want to grow up and just get married. She wants to have a career, car, money in the bank and a chance to see the world before settling down." By that time she should be able to read characters better hopefully.

    I have even told my husband if ever anything happens to him (crossing fingers it doesn't) that I will not tie myself down to a man, just to care for him. I have enough kids as it is and don't need to be bothered waking up to feed, clean and care for another, just for him to keep a tight leash on me. Yeah, I know it's probably a pretty negative view on relationships (men), but I don't think I will find another person who knows how to make me happy as the one I have. ESFp. No demands and cooks.

    If there is one thing I have noticed in life; we usually get what we expect. I didn't expect much with him, only happiness. Expectations after that are pretty much nil. Guess I have to come up with some new goals, because life seems to become pretty stagnant sometimes.

    Ok I am rambling, think I will go to try to beat my score in the arcade instead of bore you to death, but just maybe (and I am hoping here) that you ramble too. now is there another color than green smiles?
    Johari / Nohari

    Enneagram 1w2/Lifepath 1/first zodiac sign Aries/first Chinese zodiac sign RAT/first born in my siblings of 3. Did I forget to mention first?

    Independent Director

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