[ISFJ] Finding ISFJ's

[uberrogo]

Meeeeeooooooooooooooooooooooow!!!

How you doin'?

 

[Warm]

How you doin'?

Great, but I could always be better. *winks*

 

[uberrogo]

Great, but I could always be better. *winks*

My specialty *raises eye brows up and down*

 

[Saslou]

Well, this question have been nagging me for a couple weeks now. I guess it's just out of curiosity though as Jeffster and some others were talking to me about it in vent. And since Warm refuses to help me by answering my questions...

How does one go about finding and wooing an ISFJ?
What do ISFJ's look for in a guy/girl?
How similar are they to the ISTJ when it comes to relationships?
Where do they "hide out"?
How do they flirt?
What types are they typically interested in?

Well finding an ISFJ? .. I usually find them .. love the chase .. flew 3000 miles to get my ex .. lol
Its all about personality and preferable someone who doesn't bite their finger nails and has lovely hands.
I'm hiding in my fantasy land.
Openly flirtatious with the right person.
Sorry can't answer the final question .. i am not sure who my type is

 

[Tea Party]

Tell me, Tea Party, can I find ISFJs girls at a tea party? Do they still do that in their 20s and beyond?

If you can actually manage to find a group of people over the age of 20 having a tea party together, I would not be surprised if some of them were ISFJs. xD

And if you invited an ISFJ to a tea party they would totally want to come. C: It's the kind of party that an ISFJ would feel most comfortable at because it's structured and not loud or scary.

 

[Giggly]

Well finding an ISFJ? .. I usually find them .. love the chase .. flew 3000 miles to get my ex .. lol

Was your ex an ISFJ too?

 

[simulatedworld]

Yes there are a lot of ISFJs, just not on this website. More than likely you will be with one in a class Dave. I'd say a good way to identify them is to find that girl who is like an ISTJ, but softer and not logically driven in life. This doesn't mean that they are stupid, they, like every other feeler just don't think logic is that important compared to other things.

Well, that's clearly because they're illogical, stupid nincompoops.

 

[d@v3]

It's the kind of party that an ISFJ would feel most comfortable at because it's structured and not loud or scary.

loud? scary? Where is the line drawn for loud and scary?

 

[spirilis]

Hmm. The ISFJ I know was talking about tea parties last weekend...

 

[Warm]

My specialty *raises eye brows up and down*

Woohooooooooo!!!

 

[Grungemouse]

My ISFJ would snort at the idea of a tea party. She's more in favour of rock concerts. As hard as it may be to believe, not all ISFJs are drawn to quiet and structured events.

Other than that, she's usually found at home, watching TV/listening to music, at college, or out in the town centre. Plus, as you guessed, occasionally at rock concerts. She likes keeping in touch with people via social networking sites like MySpace, if that counts.

(I think an appearance-related question was in the OP?) ISFJs - at least the younger ones - dress according to what interests, subculture or group they relate best to. They like to conform, generally speaking. In my ISFJ's case, she loves rock music. So, she's coloured her hair black with red lowlights in a style that's reminiscent of Paramore's vocalist Hayley Williams (only a lot tidier). Her dress sense is rock-esque, only in a sexy and feminine way, as opposed to baggy and unflattering hooded jumpers. She simply looks well put-together, just in a rock chick kind of way. Oh, and she has lip piercing. I think she was considering getting a tattoo as well...

As for what she looks for in a partner, I'm still trying to figure that out myself. It certainly isn't looks, so I'll take a wild stab in the dark and go with personality? Even then, I'm sceptical. I'll just say she pitied fell for my INTP charm. ;P

She flirts by fluctuating between playing coy and direct innuendos; the typical "attraction-rejection" game-playing. Other than that, she never really flirted that much. She basically sent out hints to meet up (or hints for me to ask her ). She mainly sent out indirect messages about how she felt, such as romantic lyrics in her IM screen name.

She's an example of a younger ISFJ, though. The oldies could be different.

...*hides her from Dave*

 

[Requeim]

I'm an 18 year old male ISFJ, some of the questions are hard to answer for me but i'll try these:

Where do they "hide out"?

at home.... If you are at a party, look for somebody who doesn't initiate conversations a lot. They will probably always want to have at least one friend or person that they trust around at all times. Personally, i really don't like being left alone at a party, and if there's no one around that i know i tend feel lonely/anxious very quickly.

How do they flirt?

well, if the other isfj's are anything like me they don't really know how to. I've met alot of girls that i liked, but i didn't want them to think that i was too aggressive. A girl i thought i flirted with once told me that she just thought i was being nice and friendly . Look for subtle hints (he/she is always smiling/maybe staring a little at you, is nervous around you, gives you alot of compliments etc. Again if the other isfj's are like me they probably wont make the first move, as they are too scared of rejection, being made a fool of etc.

i'm not talking from experience though, i've never had a girlfriend

 

[Saslou]

I'm an 18 year old male ISFJ, some of the questions are hard to answer for me but i'll try these:



at home.... If you are at a party, look for somebody who doesn't initiate conversations a lot. They will probably always want to have at least one friend or person that they trust around at all times. Personally, i really don't like being left alone at a party, and if there's no one around that i know i tend feel lonely/anxious very quickly.



well, if the other isfj's are anything like me they don't really know how to. I've met alot of girls that i liked, but i didn't want them to think that i was too aggressive. A girl i thought i flirted with once told me that she just thought i was being nice and friendly . Look for subtle hints (he/she is always smiling/maybe staring a little at you, is nervous around you, gives you alot of compliments etc. Again if the other isfj's are like me they probably wont make the first move, as they are too scared of rejection, being made a fool of etc.

i'm not talking from experience though, i've never had a girlfriend

See this is where i start to get confused .. Granted when i finished work, i stayed at home only occasionally going out with colleagues .. But whilst in work, i enjoyed being the centre of attention as long as everyone was laughing .. i would come back from lunch with M & S underwear and show everyone to find out if they thought they were sexy enough .. We used to laugh so hard at the silly little things i would say .. (I am a say then think kind of person then take foot out of mouth) .. all good

I will make the first move if i get the feeling .. I will approach strangers and chat away like i've known them for years .. I know i may get rejected but if i dont give it a go then i will never know .. Dont like regrets ..

so again i have to ask .. when taking the test .. Are your results may be based on your frame of mind at that moment in time ..

 

[Requeim]

See this is where i start to get confused .. Granted when i finished work, i stayed at home only occasionally going out with colleagues .. But whilst in work, i enjoyed being the centre of attention as long as everyone was laughing .. i would come back from lunch with M & S underwear and show everyone to find out if they thought they were sexy enough .. We used to laugh so hard at the silly little things i would say .. (I am a say then think kind of person then take foot out of mouth) .. all good

I will make the first move if i get the feeling .. I will approach strangers and chat away like i've known them for years .. I know i may get rejected but if i dont give it a go then i will never know .. Dont like regrets ..

so again i have to ask .. when taking the test .. Are your results may be based on your frame of mind at that moment in time ..

I dont mind being the center of attention, as long as i know the people around me.

I almost always think before i talk though, and i could never just approach strangers and talk to them (If a stranger asks me something, i have no trouble replying to them though). I always regret not taking the chance with people afterwards, but it doesn't really help as i find myself freezing up again the next time.

i think my results fits me pretty good, but you could be right (i just realized very recently that i wasn't an intuitive type as i had been thinking for almost 2 months )

It could also just be that i'm a bit more careful/anxious/shy than you


edit: i found a description that applies to me, and Tea Party wrote the quote below earlier in the thread, and it is basically how i see myself (edit 2 - right now anyway :S)

Ethical-Sensory Intratim - ISFj (The Guardian)

Ha, now I get to fill one out! c:

How does one go about finding and wooing an ISFJ?
Um... I would say you should look for a shy (and possibly somewhat mopey) person who and is very intent on their surroundings. A socially awkward people watcher, I guess.

What do ISFJ's look for in a guy/girl?
ISFJ girls definitely like GENTLEMENNN. C: (But I'm pretty sure any girl with a healthy self-esteem would probably agree with that sentiment...) I think we also especially value honesty, loyalty, responsibility, and a strong work ethic. (At least I know I do.) And I think in a relationship we find a little bit of possessiveness/over-protectiveness (within reason, of course) cute. C:

How similar are they to the ISTJ when it comes to relationships?
I think pretty similar... both ISTJs and ISFJs are very loyal and dutiful in their relationships. I can't think of any especially big differences.

Where do they "hide out"?
It depends on how strong their I is. I'd say you're basically only likely to find them in mundane places like work, school, etc.

How do they flirt?
...By trying to act as innocent and unassuming as possible? I'm not sure if "flirt" is really the right word for it... (I personally can't help but feel that the stereotypical concept of "flirting" always seems to have some sort of vaguely manipulative or dishonest implication to it. I just don't like the word very much.) Basically if we are interested, we will either be painfully shy or we will be so sweet that we give you cavities. :U That's it.

What types are they typically interested in?
Well, of course I am madly in love with an ISTJ... and I can't really imagine being interested in any one else, so I'll just say we like ISTJs.

 

[Saslou]

Ha, now I get to fill one out! c:

How does one go about finding and wooing an ISFJ?
Um... I would say you should look for a shy (and possibly somewhat mopey) person who and is very intent on their surroundings. A socially awkward people watcher, I guess.
I can be shy for about the first 5 mins, but i will approach someone and talk to them, i am a people watcher but i wouldn't say socially awkward

What do ISFJ's look for in a guy/girl?
ISFJ girls definitely like GENTLEMENNN. C: (But I'm pretty sure any girl with a healthy self-esteem would probably agree with that sentiment...) Most definately, a caveman gentleman .. lolI think we also especially value honesty, loyalty, responsibility, and a strong work ethic.Yes sir (At least I know I do.) And I think in a relationship we find a little bit of possessiveness/over-protectiveness Yes(within reason, of course) cute. C:

How similar are they to the ISTJ when it comes to relationships?
I think pretty similar... both ISTJs and ISFJs are very loyal and dutiful in their relationships. I can't think of any especially big differences.This is me and my son and we get on like a house on fire, he is my rock and he is only 14

Where do they "hide out"?
It depends on how strong their I is. I'd say you're basically only likely to find them in mundane places like work, school, etc.I can be found where i can better myself, be it at home trying to relax, on a night course, in a gym, on top of a mountain, in an airplane .. lol

How do they flirt?
...By trying to act as innocent and unassuming as possible? I'm not sure if "flirt" is really the right word for it... (I personally can't help but feel that the stereotypical concept of "flirting" always seems to have some sort of vaguely manipulative or dishonest implication to it. I just don't like the word very much.) Basically if we are interested, we will either be painfully shy or we will be so sweet that we give you cavities. :U That's it.Spot on, i can be a bit full on though at times, in the sense that i can be bluntly honest to the point that i don't even realising i may be offending someone with my views. I am just passionate.

What types are they typically interested in?
Well, of course I am madly in love with an ISTJ... and I can't really imagine being interested in any one else, so I'll just say we like ISTJs. well i dont know what my children's father is, but he was a manipulative bastard who enjoyed making my life a living hell .. and my soon ex-husband is a INTJ ..we had our moments of fun and he always felt like my friend .. but he couldnt love me as much as i fell madly in love with him .. It was a constant challenge but i liked it

Maybe this is what i am meant to be then afterall ..

 

[Requeim]

Maybe this is what i am meant to be then afterall ..

i don't understand, did you doubt that you were ISFJ before then?

 

[Saslou]

i don't understand, did you doubt that you were ISFJ before then?

Yes . well parts of it .. i know im kind, caring, homemaker, protector etc etc .. but i am loud, i can be very social, and i will talk to strangers .. i recently went to a dinner party where i knew only one person and that was from online, the other 4 people i didn't know .. i chatted away and laughed so hard telling my stories .. but this isn't supposed to be part of an ISFJ .. or so i think ..

I don't know .. my biggest problem is i WONT conform to anything .. i am a woman but i'll dress like a bloke and wont wear make-up (i do rarely when needs be) .. i wont buy anti-wrinkle cream as i know its a con .. Tell me i can't do something and believe me i will .. that can be a double edged sword sometimes .. I am being placed into a box and i don't like it .. i like to think both inside and outside of the box ..

Make any sense or is your head just as messed up as mine???

 

[swordpath]

one of my sisters is an isfj . she's like the perfect lil house wife mom person...perfect for an istj i think...way more than me.

Enough with your anti ENFP/TEEJ propoghanda!

 

[d@v3]

Enough with your anti ENFP/TEEJ propoghanda!

Agreed, stop trying hide from us Erin! Don't run away from your feelings!

 

[d@v3]

Maybe this is what i am meant to be then afterall ..

Do you think you could be ESFJ? You said you were shy for the first five minutes but then you moved in?