@ maliafee - Awwwww
How does one go about finding and wooing an ISFJ?
Not at a club or bar with loud thumping music, I wouldn't have thought. They might be there, but they won't be bounding over to you. Look for the slightly shy looking person who is with a lot of friends and who may seem a bit overwhelmed by the loudness/bright lights/activity, but who looks cute rather than serious.
The best bet, unfortunately, is probably through friends, at a house party or pub or somewhere quiet where people can talk.
What do ISFJs look for in a guy/girl?
Someone somewhat traditional in terms of appearance (i.e. feminine or masculine, by the way they dress if nothing else, although I don't think this is a dealbreaker.) Trustworthy, loyal and steady so they can entrust their thoughts with you and know you won't ever embarrass or hurt them. Probably someone who takes home and family as seriously as them (my family's all over the place and I hardly contact them - I had to effectively show my bf that I could *do* family. I've now been accepted as a part of his family by his parents and he loves me for it!) They don't want a pushover though, they'll admire you if you have your own mind and opinions, as long as you don't push them down other people's throats. I think aggressivity and coarseness is a big turn-off for them. They appreciate politeness and someone who'll listen to them and at least try to understand; someone who won't ride roughshod over their feelings. Someone who appreciates and shares their sense of humour.
How similar are they to ISTJ when it comes to relationships?
The similarities I've noticed: Likes to keep private life private; relationships are a priority with them and they'll keep their word, love and cherish you as long as you don't hurt or neglect them; they like a bond which is deeper than just physical and enjoy talking and laughing with you; they want a long-term relationship and their ideal is lasting love.
The differences I've noticed: Likes to really make a fuss over you (in the nice, caring way); may be inclined to put you somewhat on a pedestal; needs affection and reassurance of your love, like the ISTJ does too, but probably moreso; sex is very much an intimate demonstration of love rather than a physical act (maybe other ISTJs feel differently from me, but I can enjoy sex for the physical feeling as well as because of any bond I have with my partner).
How do they flirt?
Coy is a good word.
Thinking about the male, they are visibly interested in you, smile a lot, are charming (when they really like you they can be surprisingly forward, in a gentlemanly way), compliment you, talk about their lives as if they're letting you in. When you've already been on a date together you'll know they like you if they call or invite you out again (heh - my ISFJ just called me right after I wrote this!! I have to admit, sometimes it's like he can read my mind ), but don't expect a kiss or physical closeness necessarily on the first date (with us it was the 3rd, but I was ready before then!) because it's not really dating etiquette. When they've assured themselves that you're a good person they'll really open up and show you the true depths of their warmth.
Hope that's somewhat accurate.