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  1. #91
    Let's make this showy! raz's Avatar
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    Small talk with someone doing something related to what I'm doing isn't that difficult. Though, getting the small talk going with the hot girl sitting behind or in front of me is harder. I just hate having a conversation for the sake of having a conversation. It just doesn't make sense to me, and 99% of the time, if I do do it, it's to try to kill some awkwardness.


  2. #92
    Carerra Lu IZthe411's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by raz View Post
    Small talk with someone doing something related to what I'm doing isn't that difficult. Though, getting the small talk going with the hot girl sitting behind or in front of me is harder. I just hate having a conversation for the sake of having a conversation. It just doesn't make sense to me, and 99% of the time, if I do do it, it's to try to kill some awkwardness.
    Maybe it's an age thing...or even experience. I just find that having a conversation for the sake of having it is meaningful. It's the basis for establishing some level of relation to another human being. As an introvert it can be hard to do sometimes.

  3. #93
    Let's make this showy! raz's Avatar
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    What else should I talk to you about though?

    I mean, I guess we could talk about favorite colors or the growing trend of credit spending in 21st century Western governments...

    or favorite colors

    But we have to talk about something! Conversation is the primary way humans communicate, and it's the only way they communicate at the level of relationship we'd be at if we meet one day in the library or something.

    Unless you just want me to walk up and snog you to get the point across.

    you want an enfp for that though


    *cough*




    Snogging might work! o_O It's situational with the small talk thing. I do small talk all day at work because it's with coworkers I've known for 3 years. When I meet a new person, the chances of them staying in my life for an extended amount of time is unreliable, so I tend to not give that much information upfront. Though, sometimes, I just clam up just to annoy them to show how stupid their small talk is. Just get to the point already!

    If you want to have a light conversation that goes nowhere, then just get away from me. Like I said, I want someone that sparks a conversation to talk about something specific or to talk to me sincerely. I don't want a conversation for a conversation.


    I can see where you're coming from seeing it as selfishness. But the major flaw in that is that 1.) it's not possible to quell an emotion (if you're an INFP), you just learn to deal with the emotions head on. So it'd be more to convert the bad feelings into positive feelings. And 2.) if I didn't legitimately want you to feel better, I wouldn't care if you felt bad. In fact, there's a few people who I enjoy seeing miserable. INFP can't just blink emotions away, and quite often we get sour emotions that make us feel like shit. It's like popping a boner or something. You just get used to it.

    I still have those emotions, I just process them on my own, and seek out ways to interpret and process the external and internal events, then be done with it.

    But seeing someone I don't like feeling bad is rare, and I tend to take a happy amount of schadenfreude out of it

    YouTube Schadenfreude from Avenue Q

    So I do legitimately care about you and want you to feel better. And yeah, it's parasitic in a way since making you feel better would satisfy my altruistic nature and make me feel better in return. But I could feel better doing many other things, so the care and concern is still there

    And I would give you solutions, but every type offers something different. ISTJs are the ones who offer solutions, and INFPs are the one who offer hugs



    Well, so there are no major differences in opinion. It'd come down to detailed sorts of things, like where I'd want to lighten the mood during a very heated conversation to diffuse the tension. I suppose if an ISTJ friend was one of the two people arguing they'd think I was stabbing them in the back, but it's really just that I hate conflict. Unless I'm actually involved in the conflict, I want it to be negotiated out through diplomacy.



    Gah, I know that feeling

    I was never really a sports people. I'm still not, except for a certain few events (US Open Tennis Tournament, Nathan's Hotdog Eating Contest, etc). But I don't keep up with that sort of stuff beyond what's necessary to know what's going during those.

    I do love the Olympics though.

    Looooooove eet

    That's just a childhood thing though.



    I'd never do it as a one night stand, and definitely not with a friend. Too much emotional investment for me :blushing:

    Would you still do it even if there was someone you were developing the chance of a relationship with?

    I'd still do it. Whichever came first. A chance is not guaranteed. No commitment = no reason to hold back.


    I guess that makes sense. I like to daydream though, and actually doing stuff is like bursting my daydream bubble


  4. #94
    Let's make this showy! raz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by IZthe411 View Post
    Maybe it's an age thing...or even experience. I just find that having a conversation for the sake of having it is meaningful. It's the basis for establishing some level of relation to another human being. As an introvert it can be hard to do sometimes.
    Or personal preference or situational. I can do small talk sometimes, but most of the time, like I said, it's almost as if it's happening to fill a void in which the two of us would rather be doing something more meaningful to eachother than the other person, which in itself just shows a lack of sincerity.


  5. #95
    Carerra Lu IZthe411's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by raz View Post
    Or personal preference or situational. I can do small talk sometimes, but most of the time, like I said, it's almost as if it's happening to fill a void in which the two of us would rather be doing something more meaningful to eachother than the other person, which in itself just shows a lack of sincerity.

    Or Ne.

    But I got what you are saying man.

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