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  1. #111
    Member Tea Party's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by raz View Post
    I just meant talk to him more. I didn't mean expect a date. Something like that requires more interaction to be seamless.
    I know. I don't really expect anything.... I'm just saying that I am not going to completely disregard him and try to move on immediately. If he magically changes his mind, that's great, but if we're just going to be friends, that's good too.
    "I feel so strongly that the deep and simple is far more essential than the shallow and complex." -Fred Rogers

  2. #112
    rawr Costrin's Avatar
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    Gah. You make me wanna hug you. You appear nonjudgmental, naive, pure, and "sweet", as Bubbles put it. It's cute and alluring. Apologies if that's not how you wish to be seen, but I can't help it! So even if I can't give you a real hug, you can at least have a virtual one.

    Quote Originally Posted by Tea Party View Post
    He is not very good with words... :c But he has been very kind and understanding. He still treats me the same way and I think is trying to make it clear to me the best way he can that he doesn't mind how I feel. It's a huge relief! :O (I hope he's not just doing it out of pity) I'm going to try my best to return his kindness and be a very good friend to him. c:
    Quote Originally Posted by Tea Party View Post
    Thank you to everyone for your support. C: To those of you who think I shouldn't give up, don't worry... I will certainly be keeping my heart open to him for a long time still to come... (it is in fact much less painful to do so now that he knows) but I am going to try not to torture myself by holding especially high hopes.
    Quote Originally Posted by Tea Party View Post
    I know. I don't really expect anything.... I'm just saying that I am not going to completely disregard him and try to move on immediately. If he magically changes his mind, that's great, but if we're just going to be friends, that's good too.
    And now to totally ruin the mood with my cynicism. I know how much unrequited love can hurt, and even when there's literally zero chance of it ever happening, your mind and heart can still stubbornly cling and fantasize. It won't help if you consciously think of the small chance of it happening. I highly suggest distancing yourself from him, trying not to distract yourself when thoughts of him come up, and letting the attraction fade. Actually, now that I think of it, you may want to ask him directly if he thinks there's any chance of it happening. But even if he says yes, as long as he is still dating the ENFP, I'd continue keeping distance.

    Well that's my thoughts.
    "All humour has a foundation of truth."
    - Costrin

  3. #113
    See Right Through Me Bubbles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Costrin View Post
    Gah. You make me wanna hug you. You appear nonjudgmental, naive, pure, and "sweet", as Bubbles put it. It's cute and alluring. Apologies if that's not how you wish to be seen, but I can't help it! So even if I can't give you a real hug, you can at least have a virtual one.
    I second this. Everyone, group hug!

    He is not very good with words... :c But he has been very kind and understanding. He still treats me the same way and I think is trying to make it clear to me the best way he can that he doesn't mind how I feel. It's a huge relief! :O (I hope he's not just doing it out of pity) I'm going to try my best to return his kindness and be a very good friend to him. c:
    Ahh, I see. I doubt it's out of pity; you seem like someone people would like to hang out with regardless. And he strikes me as a guy who would take this in a positive way, and want to be closer to you for it. Good guys are like that.

    As long as your life hasn't stopped, liking him is fine if it's tempered a bit. Liking someone is fine until you make it blown out of proportion. If you don't dwell, though, and don't obsess, things will be fine. Liking someone is supposed to be a positive thing. Makes you happy inside. Just remind yourself you've done all you can and that it's all in his hands now, anyway. You've done your best!
    4w3, IEI, so/sx/sp, female, and Cancer sign.

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  4. #114
    Senior Member swordpath's Avatar
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    You did good, Tea.

  5. #115
    Member Tea Party's Avatar
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    Aw, thanks for the hugs. C:

    Distancing myself from him seems reasonable... (although not at all appealing) but how do I do that? I have first period with him and it's not like I can get a schedule change half-way through the semester. I also tend to see him after school because we both have practice for different teams in the same area. :/ Plus, I wouldn't want to hurt his feelings! :c What should I do when he tries to talk to me?

    I am doing my best to numb myself to the feeling, but it seems impossible. Even when I feel quite convinced that he would never feel the same way, I love him the same.

    Quote Originally Posted by Bubbles View Post
    Liking someone is supposed to be a positive thing. Makes you happy inside.
    I guess I missed that part. x_x
    "I feel so strongly that the deep and simple is far more essential than the shallow and complex." -Fred Rogers

  6. #116
    rawr Costrin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tea Party View Post
    Aw, thanks for the hugs. C:
    Your welcome.

    Distancing myself from him seems reasonable... (although not at all appealing) but how do I do that? I have first period with him and it's not like I can get a schedule change half-way through the semester. I also tend to see him after school because we both have practice for different teams in the same area. :/
    Well, even if you can't distance yourself physically, you could try and distance yourself mentally. When you catch yourself thinking of him, try and force yourself onto another thought. Eventually, the thoughts of him will slow down, and become weaker in their intensity.

    Plus, I wouldn't want to hurt his feelings! :c What should I do when he tries to talk to me?
    His feelings are likely gonna be fine. More likely, he's afraid of hurting your feelings. If you told him you'd like some space, he would probably understand and honor that.

    I guess I missed that part. x_x
    Well, you're not alone at least. But I have faith that you'll achieve that state eventually.

    imo
    "All humour has a foundation of truth."
    - Costrin

  7. #117
    See Right Through Me Bubbles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tea Party View Post
    Aw, thanks for the hugs. C:
    Welcome.

    I am doing my best to numb myself to the feeling, but it seems impossible. Even when I feel quite convinced that he would never feel the same way, I love him the same.
    Take it from a girl who's been down this road. YES, it's hard. Sometimes almost impossible. And I know I'm a hypocrite because I hung onto feelings for a guy for, what, all my life until this year? (Don't judge, lol. Childhood sweetheart.) But I DID get over him. I realized, wait, this crush makes me feel miserable inside. When I fall for other guys, I feel light and fluffy. Why is it every time I bump into THIS one guy, I feel like hiding and crying?

    So I forced myself to realize that he no longer liked me that way, and that in fact liking him too much had put a barrier between us. Suddenly I could let go. It made it EASIER to talk to him, and I realized that a crush that hurts isn't worth holding onto. (unless the guy decides to change his mind, then you go for it...)

    I guess I missed that part. x_x
    It takes time, but you'll get there. Promise.
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  8. #118
    Member Tea Party's Avatar
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    Thanks to both of you. C: I think I'm beginning to get a little bit better... or at least better at putting it out of mind.
    "I feel so strongly that the deep and simple is far more essential than the shallow and complex." -Fred Rogers

  9. #119
    Let's make this showy! raz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tea Party View Post
    Thanks to both of you. C: I think I'm beginning to get a little bit better... or at least better at putting it out of mind.
    It's easy once you stop talking to them every 2 days.


  10. #120
    Perfect Gentleman! =D d@v3's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tea Party View Post
    Thanks to both of you. C: I think I'm beginning to get a little bit better... or at least better at putting it out of mind.
    It's not that easy to put things out of mind... I wish I was like a Mac and I could drag my thoughts to a trash can.
    Freedom Isn't Free. [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

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