User Tag List

First 1234 Last

Results 11 to 20 of 62

  1. #11
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    4w3
    Socionics
    EIE
    Posts
    21

    Default

    She actually did voluntarily tell me awhile back that she didn't want to rush into things, so I'm trying not to push or scare her away, just act "available" and let her decide when to move forward...but the more I think about, she will probably never do that, being an ISFJ.

    I don't really want to talk about relationship issues to her in any detail, because I don't want to make her feel uncomfortable, but at the same time I think she could appreciate my expressions of love and realize that I'm not just in it for a fling.

    I've never really knowingly met an ISFJ before, so I'm completely without ideas. I usually just let my heart do its thing naturally and openly, which really gets me hurt when I misinterpret signals. So...I need to ask her your right, but don't want to push her or give her an ultimatum...aaak

  2. #12
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    4w3
    Socionics
    EIE
    Posts
    21

    Default

    thanks beyondaurora and hmm, this is cool that ISFJ's are actually posting, since I understand many do not like to share their feelings...

    That may just clear things up for me. i could see her acting out if things got too heavy for her, which is probably natural if you trying hard to not hurt someone's feelings. i don't think it'll ever get to that point because we seem like good enough friends anyway.

  3. #13
    No moss growing on me Giggly's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    MBTI
    iSFj
    Enneagram
    2 sx/so
    Posts
    9,666

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by istar11 View Post
    thanks beyondaurora and hmm, this is cool that ISFJ's are actually posting, since I understand many do not like to share their feelings...

    That may just clear things up for me. i could see her acting out if things got too heavy for her, which is probably natural if you trying hard to not hurt someone's feelings. i don't think it'll ever get to that point because we seem like good enough friends anyway.
    When did beyondaurora become ISFJ?

    istar, I really think that you should kiss her and start thinking positively.

    PS - ultimatums (aka: asking her out) are good.

  4. #14
    Senior Member Warm's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    MBTI
    ISFJ
    Posts
    723

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Habba View Post
    This sounds quite accurate compared to my experiences. ISFJs tend to have a strong fear of rejection, and that might make them afraid of expressing their feelings in a fright of being turned down.

    But ISFJs are good in reading feelings.. but they constantly second guess themselves! So she might already know how you feel, but would be still very uncertain of it. She needs a confirmation on that. Usually several ones.

    Probably the only way to find out is just to talk about it...
    You KNOW meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!

    Anyway, Istar, if you really want to know something, just ask. If you're interested in her, tell her so and see if she feels the same. In the event that she seems distant because of your "announcement", tell her that you don't mind continuing the friendship (if that is so) and that you don't mean to make things awkward for her.

  5. #15
    Perfect Gentleman! =D d@v3's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    MBTI
    ISTJ
    Posts
    2,830

    Post

    Quote Originally Posted by Warm View Post
    You KNOW meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!

    Anyway, Istar, if you really want to know something, just ask. If you're interested in her, tell her so and see if she feels the same. In the event that she seems distant because of your "announcement", tell her that you don't mind continuing the friendship (if that is so) and that you don't mean to make things awkward for her.
    So ISFJ's like it when the guy is blunt with them?

  6. #16
    Senior Member Warm's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    MBTI
    ISFJ
    Posts
    723

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by d@v3 View Post
    So ISFJ's like it when the guy is blunt with them?
    I can't speak for all ISFJs, but I can say that I would rather know than to constantly wonder and then step out on a limb only to get crushed...

  7. #17
    Perfect Gentleman! =D d@v3's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    MBTI
    ISTJ
    Posts
    2,830

    Post

    Quote Originally Posted by Warm View Post
    I can't speak for all ISFJs, but I can say that I would rather know than to constantly wonder and then step out on a limb only to get crushed.
    Ah, apparently SJ's think alike. I am the same way but for some reason I STILL chase the xNFP's!

    I should changed my strategy.....so uhh... what are YOU doing this weekend, Hmm?

  8. #18
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Posts
    1,128

    Default

    What girl does not want to know when a guy likes them? Being blunt is what it's all about!!!

  9. #19
    Perfect Gentleman! =D d@v3's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    MBTI
    ISTJ
    Posts
    2,830

    Post

    Quote Originally Posted by maliafee View Post
    What girl does not want to know when a guy likes them? Being blunt is what it's all about!!!
    Then why do the xNFP's lead us guys on? Only because they cannot say no?

  10. #20
    Senior Member Snow Turtle's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Posts
    1,335

    Default

    There's a load of potential problems, which might or might not be ISFJ traits or just personal traits.

    a) When I think somebody has a crush on me. I'd just not react to their interests, however I wouldn't actively reject their advances (Resting head, holding arms etc) unless it was really obvious. After a while they either move on or press harder.

    b) Most ISFJs have the fear of rejection within them. Positive interest from other people tend to feel very safe, so while I might not be romantically interested in somebody. I'd feel extremely close in a friendship sort of sense.

    Reasons for not out right rejecting. We don't want to destroy the friendship, especially if it turns out they were never interested. Awkwardness...

    c) This will probably be different for individuals. The instant I know that someone is infatuated with me, but the feelings not mutual. I'll tell them as softly as I can. This is mostly to do with the fact that I think it's much much more painful for somebody to have hope and suffer unrequited love for extended periods of time.

    d) It's awesome knowing that somebody likes you. Bluntness is good (like others mentioned... we're constaly second guessing even though it's probably the correct answer). I personally prefer a slower moving relationship, transitions from friendship to relationships.

Similar Threads

  1. [ISFJ] You know your an ISFJ when...
    By DJAchtundvierzig in forum The SJ Guardhouse (ESFJ, ISFJ, ESTJ, ISTJ)
    Replies: 17
    Last Post: 07-13-2017, 04:41 PM
  2. [ISFJ] ISFJs: Do you consider yourselves an "extroverted introvert?"
    By OneLovelyAdventure in forum The SJ Guardhouse (ESFJ, ISFJ, ESTJ, ISTJ)
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 12-02-2014, 12:03 PM
  3. [ISFJ] How to tell if an ISFJ likes you
    By DJAchtundvierzig in forum The SJ Guardhouse (ESFJ, ISFJ, ESTJ, ISTJ)
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 11-06-2010, 10:39 AM
  4. [ISFP] How to tell if an ISFP dislikes you?
    By antigone in forum The SP Arthouse (ESFP, ISFP, ESTP, ISTP)
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 06-04-2010, 01:04 PM
  5. What your teacher canít tell you, I will!
    By coberst in forum Philosophy and Spirituality
    Replies: 16
    Last Post: 09-18-2009, 11:21 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO