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  1. #31
    Te > Fi > Ni Shaula's Avatar
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    Any other IS_J having problems letting go of past things?
    I knew a few ISTJs who wouldn't get over a grudge against someone until they were dead.

    The child you were yesterday and the person you were yesterday are all a part of who you are today - they're not "dead". To deny the past is to deny a large part of who you are.
    Very true but I prefer to think my past never existed. Or that child I used to be was a completely different person who died a long time ago. I hate revisiting my past, it makes me bitter and dissappointed in myself.
    Is not to be held accuntable for peeling errors.

  2. #32
    Senior Member Anja's Avatar
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    You know, Shaula, that recognizing the wounded child and helping it heal is the way out of the bitterness and disappoinment? True.
    "No ray of sunshine is ever lost, but the green which it awakes into existence needs time to sprout, and it is not always granted to the sower to see the harvest. All work that is worth anything is done in faith." - Albert Schweitzer

  3. #33
    Senior Member NewEra's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shaula View Post
    I knew a few ISTJs who wouldn't get over a grudge against someone until they were dead.
    That's the opposite of me. Usually if I get mad, I get very mad at someone for a little bit, and then forget about it a short while later and get along fine with them after then.

    It's probably not an ISTJ thing.

  4. #34
    rawr Costrin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by TheChosenOne View Post
    That's the opposite of me. Usually if I get mad, I get very mad at someone for a little bit, and then forget about it a short while later and get along fine with them after then.

    It's probably not an ISTJ thing.
    It's probably more of an unhealthy type thing. Or healthy type that was really screwed over by someone thing.

  5. #35
    Senior Member Habba's Avatar
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    I personally don't hold grudges long, at least if the other person is willing to apologize, or won't hold a grudge against me. Of course, I won't forget what has happened, but I'm not very emotional person, and holding a grudge requires lots of negative emotions I think.

    I do have a great memory. Just few days ago I was talking with a long time friend, and I noticed myself saying "Hey, you told me that already 10 years ago, no need to repeat yourself."

    Dominant Si has also given me an exceptional sense of direction. I never get lost. It's like having a Google Earth inside my head. So, I wouldn't call dominant Si just being "troublesome". It's just kind of double-bladed sword.

    But I can't help myself from recalling the "good ol' times" from my past from time to time, and mourning what I have lost (possibilities, etc). But acknowledging this, I can push myself forward and tell my dominant Si that "Only direction we can go, is forward. And only in the future we can be something that we are not now". It helps... but I just have to keep doing that actively.

    Throwing away stuff that reminds the me of the past has also helped. I bet you other Si's have plenty of stuff from the past, for the memories' sake. Do yourself a favor, and hide them!

  6. #36
    Supreme Allied Commander Take Five's Avatar
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    I definitely think ISJ remembrance of the past is a gift and a curse. A gift because of such things like I never forget where I leave my keys, and it also helps with getting to know people. There's a certain sharpness in the present that reflects a good knowledge of the past. On the other hand, it can cause great gloom and frustration when combined with a highly developed sense of responsibilty and a little bit of pessimism. I often think of things like "if only I had done this" or "I could have done more." It's like the phrase "opportunity knocks only once" was probably made up by an ISJ. As for anger or grudges, I don't hold grudges against people because I hold myself responsible for not foreseeing certain things.

  7. #37
    Te > Fi > Ni Shaula's Avatar
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    It's probably more of an unhealthy type thing. Or healthy type that was really screwed over by someone thing.
    Oh no doubt, they were very unhealthy.
    Is not to be held accuntable for peeling errors.

  8. #38
    IRL is not real Cimarron's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Habba View Post
    Throwing away stuff that reminds the me of the past has also helped. I bet you other Si's have plenty of stuff from the past, for the memories' sake. Do yourself a favor, and hide them!
    Yeah, I've made myself put reminders of the past away before, when I realized it wasn't helping me, it was just dragging me down. But I did not throw it away! I don't know, I can have a real struggle when deciding what to throw out during massive clean-ups. Si vs. Te maybe.
    You can't spell "justice" without ISTJ.

  9. #39

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    Of course that is part of having Introverted sensing, though I think it might affect Feelers over thinkers more since they might be inclined to dwell on strong emotional experiences more? I dunno. But if those experiences are always negative, then yea that can be hard. But I also agree with the people who say it's not only a curse but a blessing. These experiences and memories make you who you are and affect your personality. So I guess you just have to accept that it is part of who you are and realise that not everyone is like this, no, but that's part of what makes you unique, your ability to recall these memories and experiences, as well as the uniqueness of them in themselves, obviously.

  10. #40
    Senior Member Fuent's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Antisocial one View Post
    I am curious.

    If an NT started this thread and said that Si is very problematic function would you be offended?

    Or that depends on how it was said?
    ROAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

    INTP... I think not.

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