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  1. #41
    Senior Member substitute's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tallulah View Post
    Oh, yeah, well, I'm used to you always soliciting feedback for the choice you wanted to make in the first place. So there!
    Hey, I resent that! When I asked about the immigration issue I was initially a hair's breadth from reporting the bee-atch, but y'all changed my mind! :steam:

    ...so it seems like the actual situation is this: she's only going to see her friends, and I'm supposed to go just to support her supporting her friends...? Pfft!
    Ils se d�merdent, les mecs: trop bon, trop con..................................MY BLOG!

    "When it all comes down to dust
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  2. #42
    Emerging Tallulah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by substitute View Post
    Hey, I resent that! When I asked about the immigration issue I was initially a hair's breadth from reporting the bee-atch, but y'all changed my mind! :steam:
    Ah, well, that is true. But you have to admit you were hoping people would tell you it was your civic duty.

    I'm just giving you a hard time.

    ...so it seems like the actual situation is this: she's only going to see her friends, and I'm supposed to go just to support her supporting her friends...? Pfft!
    No, if that's the case, you're home free. The OP sounded like it was something she really enjoyed doing, and she wanted support. It's good y'all talked it out.

  3. #43
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    Yeah well, I thought that was how it was at the time I wrote the OP. Like I say it was me feeling desperately clueless about the F world and, cos I was desperate not to do the wrong thing (which I tend to assume my natural position is a lotta the time when it comes to F stuff), I was overcompensating in the other direction.

    I had good intentions...
    Ils se d�merdent, les mecs: trop bon, trop con..................................MY BLOG!

    "When it all comes down to dust
    I will kill you if I must
    I will help you if I can" - Leonard Cohen

  4. #44
    sophiloist Kaizer's Avatar
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    No experience here per se, but something that seem to be to be of import is to let them know that you do know even if that means telling them that you don't know in a manner that they feel safe in the knowledge etc etc; and that I guess buttresses a sense of stability through the feeling of the presence of a structure that is reliable etc etc.

    don't know if its relevant or if I've quite made a contribution here.
    The answer must be in the attempt
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  5. #45
    Emerging Tallulah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by substitute View Post
    Yeah well, I thought that was how it was at the time I wrote the OP. Like I say it was me feeling desperately clueless about the F world and, cos I was desperate not to do the wrong thing (which I tend to assume my natural position is a lotta the time when it comes to F stuff), I was overcompensating in the other direction.

    I had good intentions...
    Hee, yeah, I know the feeling. I usually just come straight out and ask if they'd like me to come, or ask a feely person if the other person will be disappointed if I don't.

    I've definitely learned that just because I wouldn't be offended, doesn't mean someone else wouldn't be. Sounds like that's where you're coming from, too.

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