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Thread: INTP + ESTJ

  1. #51
    Senior Member weminuche's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by InaF3157 View Post
    Quite possibly her traits were either tamed to allow her to make a good impression or were observed but played down optimistically because too much was invested already, like you described up top.
    A bit of both no doubt. I am....well maybe was....OK with some orientation towards social status in my girl. I could care less, but do recognize that there is some practical value in it, and if it's gonna happen, it's gonna have to come from her.

    For me though, I believe very strongly that personal and family values and goals must come first and decisions and actions should be based on those and be independent of what someone outside the family or society in general is going to think.

    In hindsight, that also means that anyone who has strong personal values regarding what everyone else thinks and cares deeply about what is normal/excepted/appropriate is not a good match for me. So an ESTJ....especially an unbalanced one....is likely not a good match for me.

    Live and learn I guess.
    I 60% / N 60% / T 64% / P 76%

    You always get what you settle for.

  2. #52
    Senior Member kathara's Avatar
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    Hmm, I am a bit confused. I know an ESTJ, but he is lacking all that "do it my way" attitude, so much so that it pisses me off (he always lets me chose the movie, or where to eat, or where to go next, which is a bit of overload for my P). That makes me wonder of that is the real him, or if he is more or less playing me (since he knows how much I hate being told what to do).

  3. #53
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    He has a T, which can would tell him, not to try to control you.
    My J is subordinate to my T, not the other way around.
    Join my gamma group on facebook:
    http://www.facebook.com/groups/edit....id=63943661343
    Thats if you are either ENTJ, ISFJ, ESFP or INTP

  4. #54
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    I'm probably an INTP (some tests it comes out as INTJ even sometimes INFJ). My P vs. J is pretty evenly balanced (like 52% to 48%). By a fluke of a dating site and "fun" tests I found out that the guy I just started dating is ESTJ. After reading the basic information about the type it makes sense and I can see it probably describes him pretty well.

    I've heard both the advice that this combination is great and that it's from hell. So far, for me, it seems pretty great but it's a new thing and we both share a lot of similar values. Some of it is that he's traditional in some ways and I've come back around to some traditional values after seeing some things that didn't work for me so well. Not that we agree for exactly the same reasons, but what we agree on isn't always so far off and we complement each other in some personality ways. Did I mention I like this guy a whole lot?

    But now for the comical and or slightly off kilter things:

    For the first date he invited me to a fairly expensive event I probably would have never gone to on my own. It was sweet, but he didn't let me know far enough in advance so I already had plans. He claimed he'd planned it and someone else fell through so he had an extra ticket (and I'm internally wondering if this was true or he planned it for me). I felt bad since I would've loved to have gone and I felt maybe he took it personally (though he never has mentioned it negatively).

    He also does some subtle name dropping kinds of things which I think I was supposed to be impressed by, but I just wasn't. Until I figured it out a bit more, my responses have been generally nonplussed. I just don't care all that much about status and status symbols. I care about him, not his stuff or who he knows. If he feels proud of his efforts, his hard work, and what he's accomplished I can genuinely care about that, but I have a hard time caring about the trappings.

    After some Google stalking and digging up information, he's actually being pretty modest about his accomplishments. He's subtle about the name-dropping things I mentioned above. I can see he wants people to appreciate him and his successes, but he doesn't want to come off the wrong way. Actually, knowing more about him I feel quite out of my league . . . and it makes me a little insecure. While I'm moderately successful, I'm not going to impress him with it. Maybe the same is true in reverse, I'm not going to be particularly impressed with his status symbols, so maybe we're even.

    Does this seem like a pretty typical scenario? Anything I should look for and expect from the situation?
    Last edited by skyler; 11-01-2009 at 02:01 AM. Reason: Correcting errors

  5. #55
    Senior Member great_bay's Avatar
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    I think ESTJ's guys are attractive types. They're suppose to be great match because their Te lines up with our Ti. I'm attractive to ESTJ's extroverted thinking. I like it when they use it. I used to have crushes on ESTJ guys when I was in high-school. I always thought ESTJ's were one of the few S types that can care about my functions since ours functions are complementary.

    ESTJ- Te-Si-Ne-Fi
    INTP- Ti-Ne-Si-Fe

  6. #56
    Senior Member Frosty's Avatar
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    ESTJs are the best. At least until tomorrow when I change my type.

  7. #57
    Senior Member great_bay's Avatar
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    ESTJ's please have me.

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