[NT] Do you answer your phone?

[sammy]

I usually carry my phone with me everywhere. I've even answered the phone while sticking my head out of the shower on more than one occasion.

It's a really bad habit that I'm working on changing. One of my ENFP friends "trained" me to be that way but now that I don't think it is necessary to cater to her every beck and call (she was wasting a lot of my time and energy on social/her own personal drama) I no longer carry the thing with me as much as before.

And since I'm seeing someone, who happens to be an ENTJ, I pretty much know his schedule inside and out, so I do not call him when I know he is busy. When he is free to talk, I leave it as an open opportunity for either one of us to contact the other by carrying the phone with me.

I screen a lot of my calls, reject plenty by silencing the ringer, and return SMSes fairly quickly and dependably. I think I reject my Mother's (ESFJ) phone calls the most of anyone haha. I never, ever, pick up the house phone unless my Dad (ISTJ) and I are staring at each other, wondering who will have to pick it up first.

I am an ambiguous IxFJ.

edit: I am not afraid to talk on the phone whatsoever, it's just an inconvenience to talk to certain people when I know they have a difficult time ending conversations at inopportune moments. Usually, I just won't pick up the phone if I am busy anyway, so I don't have to worry about that as much.

 

[Ezra]

Do you answer your phone?

Always. If I'm at my mother's, never (and always as a kid I refused to answer it). Someone else will get it.

And what type are you?

ENTJ

 

[Tigerlily]

I never answer the phone and keep the ringer off at all times. I do periodically check to see if anyone's called and since I check my email a gazillion times a day I have my voice mail connected to my email. That way if the kids school calls I can return the call immediately.

I have a cell phone that I turn on when I'm out and about (again in case the school calls) but I have it set on vibrate. Hearing a phone ring makes me very anxious. I love talking on the phone when I'm in the mood for it (I'll talk you ear off ask Ivy! ), but it's usually on my terms and I do all the calling.

My type is iNfJ

 

[Ivy]

I never answer the phone and keep the ringer off at all times. I do periodically check to see if anyone's called and since I check my email a gazillion times a day I have my voice mail connected to my email. That way if the kids school calls I can return the call immediately.

I have a cell phone that I turn on when I'm out and about (again in case the school calls) but I have it set on vibrate. Hearing a phone ring makes me very anxious. I love talking on the phone when I'm in the mood for it (I'll talk you ear off ask Ivy! ), but it's usually on my terms and I do all the calling.

My type is iNfJ

It's true, she will, but it's very pleasant... for a phone call, says the phone-phobic I'd much rather hang out with you in 3D!

I get anxious when I hear the phone, too. Of course, our financial problems of a couple of years ago after Noah was laid off, in which we had people calling all the time asking for more money from the empty bank account, probably didn't help that. We're fine now but I still get that "oh, fuck, did I forget to pay something?" feeling in the pit of my stomach when the phone rings sometimes.

 

[CzeCze]

Do you answer your phone?

90% of the time I do. If I'm busy, I will pick up the phone and say that I'm busy and ask if I can call back the person later.

And what type are you?

ENTJ

This is one thing I appreciate about ENTJ types and why you make such good salespeople and little terrors in the boardroom. I hate all that constant back and forth of scheduling for meetings and conference calls and follow ups and confirmations that is involved on the job, oy vey, gives me a headache. So it's reassuring to know you will get a call back or at least an answer when you try to call someone and be able to conduct very brief but not cryptic or rude phone calls and get stuff done.

 

[miss fortune]

ESTP

I answer my phone if I feel like it (which means on rare occasions) I prefer to screen my calls so that I don't get stuck talking to a sales person or someone who I really don't like I turn off the ringer on my phone for class and work and often forget to turn it back on until I'm setting my alarm on it to wake up in the morning- which means that I'll notice what calls I've missed sometime after midnight and can't call back then If I remember the next day I call them back!

People are better off texting me really- then I get thier message even when I have my ringer turned off and I can text them back when I see the message- whenever that is!

I DO always pick up my phone for my best friend and my weekly phone date though- she's calling from 5 time zones away, so we only have a small window of time in which we can speak

I end up talking for a long time usually if I DO pick up the phone- which is why I have an earpiece- so I usually don't pick up when I'm doing something else or need to do something soon!

 

[cascadeco]

CzeCze, I've struggled with social anxiety as well. That might have something to do with my phone phobia.

I have to make a confession:

when I make necessary phone calls, I'm often relieved if the other party's answering machine picks up.

I can relate to this, and also I think I have a fair dose of social anxiety.

I wonder how many introverts are introverts because of their social anxiety?? How many introverts lack social anxiety? Are there any? Do the two go hand in hand?

I answer my phone, but I often procrastinate in making calls. I'm also pretty uncomfortable using the phone for chit-chatting...so basically, I don't use the phone much at all. I always make plans w/ friends via email...thank goodness for email!!

 

[Ivy]

I can relate to this, and also I think I have a fair dose of social anxiety.

I wonder how many introverts are introverts because of their social anxiety?? How many introverts lack social anxiety? Are there any? Do the two go hand in hand?

I answer my phone, but I often procrastinate in making calls. I'm also pretty uncomfortable using the phone for chit-chatting...so basically, I don't use the phone much at all. I always make plans w/ friends via email...thank goodness for email!!

I think it's very possible that some people are misdiagnosed as introverts when they're really just shy extroverts whose energy is directed outward but blocked due to anxiety.

Starting in college I worked super hard on getting comfortable with people, and I don't have much social anxiety anymore. In a way I've become MORE introverted since then because I've been able to accept myself as an introvert without judging myself for being shy.

 

[sammy]

I think it's very possible that some people are misdiagnosed as introverts when they're really just shy extroverts whose energy is directed outward but blocked due to anxiety.

Starting in college I worked super hard on getting comfortable with people, and I don't have much social anxiety anymore. In a way I've become MORE introverted since then because I've been able to accept myself as an introvert without judging myself for being shy.

Ivy, wow, that's exactly like me. I've worked very hard to become extremely comfortable interacting with people in the past few years and broken free of social anxieties along the way... but now, I'm okay with just being who I am and requiring time to myself, away from the social scene periodically to remove myself from drama.

Or, I could be a shy extrovert. Who knows. But it's certainly helped in my phone-picking up abilities!

 

[cascadeco]

I think it's very possible that some people are misdiagnosed as introverts when they're really just shy extroverts whose energy is directed outward but blocked due to anxiety.

Starting in college I worked super hard on getting comfortable with people, and I don't have much social anxiety anymore. In a way I've become MORE introverted since then because I've been able to accept myself as an introvert without judging myself for being shy.

I did the same thing in college, and I'm far, far more comfortable with people now than I was when I was younger.

But the residual anxiety is still there at times, and one of the things I still struggle with is feeling extremely self-conscious of my quietness. Perhaps it's my Fe, and my thinking it's not 'ok' to be quiet because I think other people want me to talk more. Hmm. So yeah, I still have a few things to address.

Also, this ties to my dislike of the phone!! I'm not that talkative to begin with!!

Anyway...good points!

 

[Spirited_Away]

i am ENTP but i hardly ever pick up my phone, unless it's expected or from family (and expected). may be because I don't expect any good news or people liking me at all

 

[Spirited_Away]

my mom is over 60 y.o. and she is sick of me not answering phone, so after all this years she finally learned how to TXT me )) yes it's that bad :-(

 

[Cality]

And what type are you? My burning questions this morning.

Do you answer your phone?

I very rarely answer my phone. If I know I'm expecting a call (husband calls every night at x o'clock while working a certain shift), I'll pick it up, but generally I let it ring. I don't even go listen to the answering machine. And I wont get call display, because I'm not interested in seeing who's calling. Plus I don't want to have to deal with "you saw it was me, why didn't you answer".

And what type are you?

INTJ


------------------------

I live with an introvert who answers the phone. Even when he knows he shouldn't (i.e., when he knows his dad is calling and it's going to be a Bad Call). To him a ringing phone must be answered (he's an SJ btw). To me a ringing phone must be silenced - (by setting answering machine to two rings, or turning the ringer off). While I think introversion plays a part in this, I think there are other factors at work.

I hate being interupted. H-a-t-e-i-t. That's what the phone is to me, an interuption. I know I'm not alone.

I am an ENxP and i don't always answer my cellphone. Only my house phone. Mostly because I don't have time to answer and know that answering machines are there for this. I mostly don't answer when I "know" or think i know, why the person calls me. I also don't regularly check my answering machine at home and miss messages and i also don't always read my mail when i know it's uninteresting (like banks stuffs. i check my bank account on internet anyway.) I leave my mail somewhere unopenened and when there are too many unopened, i open it. Am I the only one doing this?

 

[kuranes]

Wow, you guys are almost unanimously anti-phone. Not me.

I enjoy a conversation just for the conversation itself, which sometimes even reminds me of things I would have forgotten otherwise, as I'm telling somebody about my situation or hearing about theirs.

During the day, I often have to make sure I don't miss the calls ( I keep hearing it ring while I'm in the shower, even though it usually isn't ) because I often make my living by being the guy who has to get through to well screened executives. Or I'm doing some other sales related thing, or Recruiting. In these "hunter" positions, one does not often have the luxury of getting right through to someone and getting a straight answer from them. You have to leave a provocative message and hope they call you back. If they do call, maybe days or weeks later, they won't let it ring long before giving up, since my name was unfamiliar to them to begin with. Sometimes they will even return these calls at night ! Then I have to quickly remember what I was calling this particular person for, out of the many names of people on the docket in recent weeks ! That's one of the tougher parts of it.

In my personal life, I am less forgiving of tentativity, because I hear it all day long from prospects.

I'm typically totally understanding of people telling me "Hey, I gotta go" if the two of us are on the phone. It strikes me that a lot of y'all don't want to tell people that, which is one reason why you don't want to get something started with them in the first place.

Sometimes I will tell people to "call back in so and so many minutes/hours" if I'm tied up, or ask if/when I can call them back, since it was me who was occupied, and I therefore feel the ball is in my court now, so to speak.

But I like talking to my friends, and so I'll take calls when I'm getting ready to eat dinner, even, sometimes. I'll tell them in those cases, that I'm going to be less talkative than normal, since I'm going to have my mouth full a good bit of the time, and they'll have to do the lion's share of the conversation.

Meeting people in person is even better, but not always worth the waaay extra effort to make it happen, unless it is someone who you don't get to see ( or even interact with ) often. If you already know what they look like, and how they would probably look while responding, with the body language, it is especially an extra effort. Having said that, however, I still do enjoy hanging out in person with people. I'm glad that I don't have to personally meet with every person that I am dealing with professionally, though. I can sit there in my underwear, and still talk serious biz, if I want to, and they can feel free to imagine me in a suit and tie, if that's what floats their boat.

I've never gotten round to getting one of those headphone/earphone harnesses so that I can just continue doing things while talking. That would free me up even more, I guess; but I wouldn't be giving them my full attention, which I often think is warranted. It would actually be more intrusive ( for me ) to have to type on a keypad if I was trying to multi-task, than it would be to speak to someone.

The only thing that I like better about email is:
( 1. ) I can do it at my convenience
( 2. ) I can do it and rearrange it if I don't like what seems to be shaping up, prior to sending it.
( 3. ) I can do it without being interrupted.

Those are good things, for sure, but there is a trade-off in missing the all important "tone", and hearing hesitance before or during an answer etc. Contrastingly, it's easy to mistake one tone for something else in text/email, even with emoticons, especially with people who think it's uncool to use them. Mistakes like that can cause problems.

With a voice there are sooo many nuances, so that you are waaay closer to understanding what the person means, even if it is not always what they are saying.

Having said that, however, apparently I do sometimes miss "hints' that we should start winding up the conversation. ( I've told people not to be subtle, just in case, but apparently they can't handle just telling me directly that they want to get going. )

Sometimes I'll hear about it later, in 20/20 hindsight that "we spent hours on the phone last week" as though it's like indulging in chocolate syrup or otherwise sinful. I'll be thinking "And?"

With some people it is just that they are hung up on goodbyes, With others, I think they were actually having as much fun with the conversation as me at the time, but they had a guilt attack, after the fact, for "enjoying themselves" ( read that in hindsight as "wasting time" ), and so they would like to lay the entire "blame" of the matter on me ! Then we'll be talking about it perhaps, and they'll forget they were/are peeved and start enjoying themselves again, often asking questions that they know cannot be tersely answered, even as we are both supposed to be "wrapping things up". Hah. It takes two to tango !!

Type = XNXP, I think. Heh.

 

[G-Virus]

I never answer the phone . . .

ENxP

 

[GargoylesLegacy]

Do you answer your phone?
Nuhu, never! I hate that Thing. And actually, mostly I forget we even have it! Unless it will rrrrrring, and mostly it does during very stupid Times, like when eating, doing Something very important or SLEEPING! Gee! Some People have weird Timing.
I dun listen to the Answering-Machine, I dun really check the Display or the "missed Call List"...Nothing. I am just not interested. People who need to reach me know other Ways (IM, Forum, Mail, PM, whatever). I dun like to talk on the Phone, really not. It's just sit and do Nothing. There, said it. When chatting I can at least do other Things meanwhile, and that's what I like more.

What type are you?
Can you guess? Yep, INTJ, you got it. Gratz. Here are some Cookies.

BWT, my odd Roommate always yells at me for not answering the Phone. But really, I dun give a Crap. "My" People already know anyways that they can't reach me there. Even my Cell is shut off all the Time. It is really only an Emergency Thing. Nothing more.

 

[ajblaise]

Most phone calls I get are the "Hey, so meet in 20 minutes?" kind, so I'll usually pick up, but I'm not a big phone phan. I despise getting phone calls from 1-800 numbers, I ignore those.

 

[LucrativeSid]

I usually answer it to just to be respectful and to get it done. If someone dialed the wrong number, then at least they'll know they've got the wrong number. If it's someone I know and I don't want to talk because I'm not in the mood or I'm busy, then I'll just say so and suggest another time for them. I don't really like talking on the phone, though. It makes me feel stuck.

 

[RiderOnTheStorm]

Rarely. I dislike the phone. I don't like texting either for that matter. Is this unusual for an ENFP? I primarily use it for taking pictures when my real camera is not available, alarm and to check the time.

 

[Nocapszy]

I don't.
Fuck 'em. Let it go to voicemail or text.
I don't pay for unlimited text so I can waste my time talking on the phone.