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  1. #621
    Junior Member silverlining's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tikka View Post
    Just a question to all you NT's. I see that many of you are proud individuals who can easily detach emotion when making decisions. You do not really care if people like you or your decisions.

    My questions:

    1) You're human. So you do have emotions. Do you feel you need to consciously surpress them, or is the surpressing 'natural' and is it going automatically?

    2) Are emotions a nuisance to you? Why?

    My type's (ENFJ) weak points are that every action we take we do for the benefit of others, cancelling our own needs out of the equation. That's probably the opposite as what the NT's naturally do. For us: if others are happy, we are happy. We are focused on not to offend anyone (unless the group benefits), we hate conflict (unless the group benefits, etc.) and we like status quo.

    So I'm just curious to NT's natural abilities and their rationale, they're way of coping or showing them, so I can perhaps get new insights on improving my own weak points.

    People might find some of your character traits suck, but understanding them might turn out to be useful for me.
    I feel like my emotions are a huge pitfall to my personality. Almost like I'm not entitled to feel them. When I realize that I really value another person's presence in my life or I feel that I need them I get very annoyed with myself. My natural instinct is to be totally independent, not let anyone help me, and to stifle all emotional responses to situations that normally necessitate emotion. Also, I tend to get extremely awkward and irritated around emotionally vulnerable people. Opening up makes me feel like I'm imposing on others and I get sort of tense after doing so. I feel guilty and embarrassed.

    Oddly. Those few people in my life that I value greatly, I would do anything for. Sell my car to bail them out of a bad way financially, listen to them at any point in time that they could ever need an ear even if they're displaying a lot of emotion, and I like to buy them gifts to make them happy and make them things to let them know I'm thinking of them. It's a strange thing. I'm either totally and completely disinterested in your existence and the effect that I have on it, or I love you so much that I view your well-being as more important than mine.

    I hope that helps a little! I see you're fairly new to posting. Welcome! I hope you enjoy it.
    the flames and smoke climbed out of every window and disappeared with everything that you held dear. but you shed not a single tear for the things that you didn't need 'cause you knew you were finally free.
    ben gibbard

  2. #622
    Senior Member Tikka's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by silverlining View Post
    I feel like my emotions are a huge pitfall to my personality. Almost like I'm not entitled to feel them. When I realize that I really value another person's presence in my life or I feel that I need them I get very annoyed with myself. My natural instinct is to be totally independent, not let anyone help me, and to stifle all emotional responses to situations that normally necessitate emotion. Also, I tend to get extremely awkward and irritated around emotionally vulnerable people. Opening up makes me feel like I'm imposing on others and I get sort of tense after doing so. I feel guilty and embarrassed.

    Oddly. Those few people in my life that I value greatly, I would do anything for. Sell my car to bail them out of a bad way financially, listen to them at any point in time that they could ever need an ear even if they're displaying a lot of emotion, and I like to buy them gifts to make them happy and make them things to let them know I'm thinking of them. It's a strange thing. I'm either totally and completely disinterested in your existence and the effect that I have on it, or I love you so much that I view your well-being as more important than mine.

    I hope that helps a little! I see you're fairly new to posting. Welcome! I hope you enjoy it.
    Thanks for your answer.

    As for your first sentence: my first reaction would be that your emotions are a necessary part of your personality, so how can it be a pitfall?

    But I understand you see emotions as a some sort of 'primal' way of dealing with people and that you prefer to use your thinking, your rationale for a more sophisticated, calculated approach, is that right?

    Actually, I should start a new thread, as my current questions actually admire the traits of (I)NTs that 'suck', because I lack them by default. I used to be more like this before university. Somehow at uni I became a mushy F type.

  3. #623

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    welcome

    Quote Originally Posted by Tikka View Post

    1) You're human. So you do have emotions. Do you feel you need to consciously surpress them, or is the surpressing 'natural' and is it going automatically?
    Quote Originally Posted by Tikka View Post
    For us: if others are happy, we are happy. We are focused on not to offend anyone (unless the group benefits), we hate conflict (unless the group benefits, etc.) and we like status quo.
    now, for Ti:

    Introverted Thinking
    Hero: (Ti) Intellectual clarity
    Anima/Animus: (Fe) "As much as I want harmony with others, at times I need to make a tough decision."

  4. #624
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    lol what downsides?

    As an INTP female, I can come off as aloof, super innocent, patronizing, cold, shy, "realllly nice," or just weird, which I'm NOT (ok, maybe I'm weird :P). People have the uneasy feeling that they're not getting the full picture with me, because I look girly but don't act it. I've also been told by very intelligent people that it's like I'm 'thinking on a different level' when I'm pretty sure they are as smart or smarter than me, so I'm basically isolated from the people I want to connect to.

    Feeling like I'm not accomplishing anything.

    And it's very hard to find a good partner who can be okay with my silence and not mistrust it. Someone who isn't afraid to just play around with me too

  5. #625
    Senior Member Valuable_Money's Avatar
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    1) You're human. So you do have emotions. Do you feel you need to consciously surpress them, or is the surpressing 'natural' and is it going automatically?

    I have emotions I just dont allow them to influence my actions very much, occasionaly Ill find myself on my man period or somthing and Ill have to take a second to calm down and think about things before I act. Usualy I end up rationalizeing my emotions away if that makes any sense, "GRRRR ____ IS SUCH A JERK IM GOING TO DO _________ AND RUIN HE/SHE/ITS LIFE!!!!!" turns into "Now Im shure _____ had a reason for what they did and he/she/it wasnt trying to inconveince you. The better course of action would be to find a solution to the problems _____ caused(wether they were intentional or not) rather than waste your time with a petty power struggle."



    2) Are emotions a nuisance to you? Why?
    Well yes and no. I like the good ones but hate the bad ones
    Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh? wgah'nagl fhtagn

  6. #626
    Branded with Satan murkrow's Avatar
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    1. Superiority complex or inferiority complex depending on p/j
    2. Very tough to find a girl dumb enough to buy your self image if you're a guy. Very tough to find a guy smart enough to respect if you're a girl.
    3. No matter how hard you try to stop them people will treat you with what you consider to be disrespect.
    wails from the crypt.

  7. #627
    sophiloist Kaizer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by murkrow View Post
    1. Superiority complex or inferiority complex depending on p/j
    2. Very tough to find a girl dumb enough to buy your self image if you're a guy. Very tough to find a guy smart enough to respect if you're a girl.
    3. No matter how hard you try to stop them people will treat you with what you consider to be disrespect.
    Just wanted to point out that the latter is the only complex that exists.

  8. #628
    man-made neptunesnet's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer View Post
    lol, okay -- point taken then, now that I understand that.



    Good point as well. Although sometimes people are as hard-headed as they accuse us of being -- "You WILL listen to me, and you WILL sympathize, and you WILL help me feel better... just because I want you to!"

    The only conflict is with people who you're related to... who thus attach empathy requirements to the relationship (spouse, kid, parent, whatnot). Those ones are hard to weasel out of: "You married me, so you're supposed to care!"
    EDIT:

    "Pityme! pityme!" is not a charateristic of all Fs.
    I only know about NFs, and we don't particularly want anyone to pity us.
    We only vent to loved ones when we feel we are out of options. Like NTs, we explore all of our possibilities, too, and when we feel there are no solutions to a problem/issue/concern we get frustrated!
    Plus, I wouldn't want to talk to anyone anyway who didn't want to listen to me. I'd rather talk to myself.
    Last edited by neptunesnet; 09-18-2009 at 10:46 PM.

  9. #629
    Member ilovetrannies's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by neptunesnet View Post
    "Pityme! pityme!" is not a charateristic of all Fs. Only SFs.
    As far as I'm concerned, NFs don't particularly want anyone to pity them.
    Well, maybe ENFs (I don't know any personally) but definitely not INFs.
    We only vent to loved ones when we feel we are out of options. Like NTs, we explore all of our possibilities, too, and when we feel there are no solutions to a problem/issue/concern we get frustrated!
    Just remember: Feeling Sensors just like pity parties sometimes. :rolli:
    Plus, I wouldn't want to talk to anyone anyway who didn't want to listen to me. I'd rather talk to myself.
    Only SFs. Ok, we are all individuals and to generalize SFs is simply not true and illogical. I vent to loved ones because they know that I have to talk about what is bothering me before I start to freak out. They are very understanding that way. I am not asking for any fucking pity, I just need someone to listen and tell me that everything will be ok, even tho I know it will be.

    Sometimes I have to speak to people who I dislike but I will try to treat with respect as long as I can without strangling the motherfucker.

    And to generalize SFs is rather rude and ignorant.:steam:

  10. #630
    Nips away your dignity Fluffywolf's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chi'xer View Post
    Just wanted to point out that the latter is the only complex that exists.


    I agree.
    ~Self-depricating Megalomaniacal Superwolf

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