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Thread: INTJ flirting

  1. #51
    The elder Holmes Mycroft's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cindyrella View Post
    I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be insulting/rude.
    No need to apologize, I asked because I was curious as to what lead you to believe he was an INTJ and was in no way insulted/berude-ified.
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  2. #52
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mycroft View Post
    No need to apologize, I asked because I was curious as to what lead you to believe he was an INTJ and was in no way insulted/berude-ified.
    Good.

  3. #53
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    The post by Cindyrella makes me wonder if there is any hope of this young INTJ finding any love. Damn I am hopeless in that department! As for flirting I don’t mind doing some online and might find it entertaining, but IRL it’s not exactly my thing. :P

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    Quote Originally Posted by Splittet View Post
    The post by Cindyrella makes me wonder if there is any hope of this young INTJ finding any love. Damn I am hopeless in that department! As for flirting I don'd mind doing some online and might find it entertaining, but IRL it's not exactly my thing! :P
    Oh, come on now! All my post really says is that one particular INTJ didn't work with this particular INFP! That's all.

  5. #55
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cindyrella View Post
    Oh, come on now! All my post really says is that one particular INTJ didn't work with this particular INFP! That's all.
    I know. This particular INTJ can see a lot of himself in the INTJ you are describing though. It’s not however as if this is the first time I have been thinking I am hopeless in the love department. Your post (which I by the way loved) only served as a reminder.

  6. #56
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mycroft View Post
    No need to apologize, I asked because I was curious as to what lead you to believe he was an INTJ and was in no way insulted/berude-ified.
    Yeah, you have to get on the side of blatently rude or calling them illogical before it is concidered rudeness. I like to try and remember that when an NT asks a question they're more than likely just gathering info, especially the introverts.
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  7. #57
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    Quote Originally Posted by runvardh View Post
    Yeah, you have to get on the side of blatently rude or calling them illogical before it is concidered rudeness. I like to try and remember that when an NT asks a question they're more than likely just gathering info, especially the introverts.
    The crux of most of my issues with my husband. I'm gathering info, he thinks I'm judging him or worse, accusing him of 'not knowing' something. :steam:

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    Quote Originally Posted by runvardh View Post
    Yeah, you have to get on the side of blatently rude or calling them illogical before it is concidered rudeness. I like to try and remember that when an NT asks a question they're more than likely just gathering info, especially the introverts.
    Heh, when he responded that he did not take my comment as rudeness, I remember the guy I dated being that way as well. I could say virtually anything (things which, if said to me, I would probably be sensitive to) and he wouldn't be offended or upset in the slightest. That was a definite plus to my dating experience with him, as opposed to the NF I've been on and off with for 3 years, who is sensitive to just about everything I say, and the tone I say it in, etc. And I am just as guilty of that...lol.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Cindyrella View Post
    Heh, when he responded that he did not take my comment as rudeness, I remember the guy I dated being that way as well. I could say virtually anything (things which, if said to me, I would probably be sensitive to) and he wouldn't be offended or upset in the slightest. That was a definite plus to my dating experience with him, as opposed to the NF I've been on and off with for 3 years, who is sensitive to just about everything I say, and the tone I say it in, etc. And I am just as guilty of that...lol.
    Yes, I see this as more an INTx trait -- where many things that are seemingly offensive to people in general are just shrugged off. Almost anything can be considered, as long as it remains impersonal. It's only when it gets personal that synapses start firing back.

    I did notice in my own experiences that INFPs seem more "touchy" or just more susceptible to emotional nuance than INTPs. They also take more care to "dance around" a topic that might prove offensive or hurtful, where an INTP is more apt to blunder merrily right through the middle, either not anticipating or not caring that someone might feel hurt by the comment or question.

    I also constantly finding myself, when talking with NF types, to say "It's okay to talk about this, I don't mind; please ask me anything you want, there's nothing you could really say that would offend me," and then they're okay... but until that gets said, they often will treat a topic too gently or just not ask certain questions that I just know are running through their heads.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jennifer View Post
    Yes, I see this as more an INTx trait -- where many things that are seemingly offensive to people in general are just shrugged off. Almost anything can be considered, as long as it remains impersonal. It's only when it gets personal that synapses start firing back.

    I did notice in my own experiences that INFPs seem more "touchy" or just more susceptible to emotional nuance than INTPs. They also take more care to "dance around" a topic that might prove offensive or hurtful, where an INTP is more apt to blunder merrily right through the middle, either not anticipating or not caring that someone might feel hurt by the comment or question.

    I also constantly finding myself, when talking with NF types, to say "It's okay to talk about this, I don't mind; please ask me anything you want, there's nothing you could really say that would offend me," and then they're okay... but until that gets said, they often will treat a topic too gently or just not ask certain questions that I just know are running through their heads.
    Having to do that around a vast majority of people doesn't help that mind set. Honestly, there are times when I wish I had more INTx's to talk to.
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