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Thread: INTJ flirting

  1. #31
    Senior Member nottaprettygal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by FMWarner View Post
    It's funny, maybe it's just a matter of perspective. But I'm an INTJ, and I love women and love sex. It's just that I'm virtually incapable of obtaining it. Maybe other INTJs are like me. It's not that I don't care about sex, it just feels like I'm on a lake with a thousand other boats, and all the guys in the other boats have fishing rods and I just have my hands.
    I don't understand. Can't you just work on acquiring the skills needed to have sex (or relationships, etc.)? It's just like learning any other normal type of skill when you look at it that way.

  2. #32

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    Quote Originally Posted by nottaprettygal View Post
    I don't understand. Can't you just work on acquiring the skills needed to have sex (or relationships, etc.)? It's just like learning any other normal type of skill when you look at it that way.
    I really wish I could. I suppose intellectually I could learn to do it, but my absolutely paralyzing shyness wouldn't allow me to put it into practice. It's like learning how to be a skydiver when you're afraid of heights.

    And yes, I use analogies constantly. I have to work on that.

  3. #33
    Strongly Ambivalent Ivy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by FMWarner View Post
    I really wish I could. I suppose intellectually I could learn to do it, but my absolutely paralyzing shyness wouldn't allow me to put it into practice. It's like learning how to be a skydiver when you're afraid of heights.

    And yes, I use analogies constantly. I have to work on that.
    That's N at work. Don't fight it, embrace it.
    The one who buggers a fire burns his penis
    -anonymous graffiti in the basilica at Pompeii

  4. #34
    Senior Member nottaprettygal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by FMWarner View Post
    I really wish I could. I suppose intellectually I could learn to do it, but my absolutely paralyzing shyness wouldn't allow me to put it into practice.
    I think the key is making it intellectual and hoping that the emotional will follow. But thinking of sex/relationships as intellectual at least makes the process tolerable.

    The shyness is tough though. I have that problem myself. Sometimes I just have to pretend like I'm someone else. . . an actor playing a part in order to get through social situations with the opposite sex.

  5. #35

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    Quote Originally Posted by nottaprettygal View Post
    I think the key is making it intellectual and hoping that the emotional will follow. But thinking of sex/relationships as intellectual at least makes the prospect tolerable.

    The shyness is tough though. I have that problem myself. Sometimes I just have to pretend like I'm someone else. . . an actor playing a part in order to get through social situations with the opposite sex.
    I never thought about the "actor playing a part" thing. That holds some promise.

    What I REALLY need is a little guy on my shoulder like Fred Flintstone has Gazoo. He can whisper in my ear when a woman is flirting with me, because I sure don't know. Then he can tell me what to say.

    Thanks for helping me with ideas that don't involve little green levitating spacemen

  6. #36
    Senior Member Cerpin_Taxt's Avatar
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    I'll elaborate on my previous comment. I understood flirting to be something one does with the prospect of getting layed, but if were including making joke passes at friends and the sought, then yes I guess I do flirt, sometimes so well they think I'm being serious.

    As far as anonymous women go, well, is there a way to say 'cram the small talk and get to the point' without sounding like a asshole, can I count that as flirting?



    Oh come on, don't look at me like that, don't I even get point's for participation.



    Oh screw you guys, this is ridiculous, this is just ridiculous.

    P.S- FMWarner nice avater, another T-Shirt idea to add to the pile.

  7. #37
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cerpin_Taxt View Post
    I'm very oblivious to flirting, and it's usually only pointed out to me by friends about 5-10 mins after the fact.
    Well, my friend, let me tell you that sure as hell beats your S.O. telling you later in the evening or 3 days after the fact that someone was flirting with you. "Hmpt! Why don't you get your little friend to help you!" I didn't do anyth- "Oh you know damn well what you did!"

    Quote Originally Posted by FMWarner View Post
    What I REALLY need is a little guy on my shoulder like Fred Flintstone has Gazoo. He can whisper in my ear when a woman is flirting with me, because I sure don't know. Then he can tell me what to say.
    Wingman. The term is wingman! Someone to fight off the bogeys of jealous girlfriends or spot ravage ex's who can't move on. Someone to do the selling of you for you, who is also adept at reading between bs lines or at least who's brave enough to ask the questions aloud after she says something that makes you think, "Hmmm, I wonder what she meant by that???"

    A good wingman can get the conversation flowing or will have no problem getting it started. A wingman can serve as both your cornerman and cut man. Someone who sees the total action, knows where you're losing points in the judging and also spots vulnerable areas you can exploit. The wingman is all about setting it up for you to close.

    Maybe someday you'll find your ultimate wingman. The one who'll put himself in harm's way by doing the fat, dumpy friend just so you can have that one magical, night of connection with someone you both realize could be the one.

  8. #38

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    Quote Originally Posted by Cerpin_Taxt View Post
    I'll elaborate on my previous comment. I understood flirting to be something one does with the prospect of getting layed, but if were including making joke passes at friends and the sought, then yes I guess I do flirt, sometimes so well they think I'm being serious.

    As far as anonymous women go, well, is there a way to say 'cram the small talk and get to the point' without sounding like a asshole, can I count that as flirting?



    Oh come on, don't look at me like that, don't I even get point's for participation.



    Oh screw you guys, this is ridiculous, this is just ridiculous.

    P.S- FMWarner nice avater, another T-Shirt idea to add to the pile.
    Thanks...I actually did create that image and make a T shirt of it, but just for me. Maybe people would actually want to buy one. That is, unless they're a Rangers or Devils fan

  9. #39
    darkened dreams labyrinthine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MacGuffin View Post
    Yeah, even if INTJ men get past the whole sex-as-a-concept conundrum, they are woefully inadequate to do much about it.
    You are such a stinker, but quite eloquent with your insults.

    As a person whose communication style has long made me perceived as nearly asexual (while never being even close to matching that assumption), I tend to approach these things in a more simplistic way. Personality types determine the way a person communicates. Sexual desire is based on something much simpler - having the body parts and hormones to trigger it. If you have all your parts and such, you will have a healthy libido, etc. Low libidos are more the result of physiology. Some types are just far more apt to hide their sexual desires. You may be surprised just how much a person can hide.
    Step into my metaphysical room of mirrors.
    Fear of reality creates myopic morality
    So I guess it means there is trouble until the robins come
    (from Blue Velvet)

  10. #40
    On a mission Usehername's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by toonia View Post
    As a person whose communication style has long made me perceived as nearly asexual (while never being even close to matching that assumption).... Some types are just far more apt to hide their sexual desires. You may be surprised just how much a person can hide.
    yeah--me too
    *You don't have a soul. You are a Soul. You have a body.
    *Faith is the art of holding on to things your reason once accepted, despite your changing moods.
    C.S. Lewis

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