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  1. #1
    Member Paris34's Avatar
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    Default MBTI correlation with LGBTQA+ individuals and coming out

    Do you think there is a correlation between MBTI type and the ease at which or the method that an individual takes to discover and understand their sexuality/gender identity?

    From personal experience as a queer INTP (5 on the Kinsey scale), I think my type played a big role in my questioning process. Being in the gray area caused me to research for months on end and never really reach a conclusion; I'm still not 100% percent sure because how can you ever be sure about something that can be fluid and subject to slight changes and variances.

    I'm willing to hypothesize that my Ti - Ne - Si loop went on the fritz and my Ti starting analyzing all the ways that the information could be wrong or right, Ne found new possibilities and kept adding in other options, and Si had me constantly referring to old info from the past and that I wrongly thought would invalidate my sexuality. (It probably also didn't help my little brain that I've had no experience, so technically this was all theory and could have been wrong, but I'm not particularly fond of going out and playing the field, so I just researched.) And my weak little Fe at the bottom, would occasionally worry about what people would think.

    Do you think there is a type that more easily will come to know their true identity - that is once they have moved on from stereotypes and thought that they might fall under the LGBTQA+ umbrella - or a type that the questioning process is easier for?
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  2. #2
    @.~*virinaĉo*~.@ Totenkindly's Avatar
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    My personal impression is that Fi folks seem to be much better at figuring out "who/what" they are and following it. They're used to listening to the inner voice as a source of truth. In the trans community, there is a huge proportion of INFPs that I've run into (for example) far beyond the average distribution for that type.

    My personal experience is that I struggled for many, many, many years due to my TiNe factor -- it discounts personal subjective experience as a source of truth, and I always doubt everything. I had to significantly change over the years to be in a position to make decisions about who I "really was."
    "Hey Capa -- We're only stardust." ~ "Sunshine"

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  3. #3
    Senior citizen velveteen's Avatar
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    Hmm, I've never felt the need to define my sexuality (not straight). I don't really think about it that much, because it's not something that I feel, it's just something that I am. I also don't think that it's set in stone, @Paris34.


    As a side note: The non-hetero INFPs and ENFJs I know really like to label themselves as queer, non-binary, pansexual, polyamorous etc etc. I don't doubt their sexual orientations or preferences, but I think it has a lot to do with 1) image/uniqueness/quirks (INFPs) and 2) political correctness (ENFJs).
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    untitled Chanaynay's Avatar
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    There was some correlational study someone posted a while ago about OKcupid populations. From what I remember, the majority of gay men were ESFJ and the majority of gay women were INTP (someone can correct me if I'm remembering the women's statistics wrong).
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    Vaguely Precise Seymour's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chanaynay View Post
    There was some correlational study someone posted a while ago about OKcupid populations. From what I remember, the majority of gay men were ESFJ and the majority of gay women were INTP (someone can correct me if I'm remembering the women's statistics wrong).
    Here's that thread.

    The OkCupid data (mentioned in the above thread) is interesting, but not necessarily representative of the non-OkCupid using population. Still, interesting how the percentages work out. Also note statistically that a given type being the most likely to be gay doesn't mean they are the most numerous gay type (particular if the type is pretty rare).

    As far as the coming out process: while I was clear about what I was feeling along the way, the INFP tendency to take everything seriously and have to work it through internally was sometimes a drag. My fundamentalist upbringing didn't help either.

    Some other gay folks I know seemed to have been more matter of fact, and a lot of their coming out process was dealing with the reactions of others, rather than having much internal stuff to work though.

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    untitled Chanaynay's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Seymour View Post
    As far as the coming out process: while I was clear about what I was feeling along the way, the INFP tendency to take everything seriously and have to work it through internally was sometimes a drag. My fundamentalist upbringing didn't help either.

    Some other gay folks I know seemed to have been more matter of fact, and a lot of their coming out process was dealing with the reactions of others, rather than having much internal stuff to work though.
    For me it was much more internal. I had to psychologically get used to the idea of liking men, so when I was 11-14 I called myself bi. It wasn't up until sophomore year when I was 15 when I realized I was gay - thanks to my (bisexual) ENFJ bestie asking me "Chandler, are you attracted to women?" and me responding with "well...I think they're really pretty!" Talk about a wake-up call.

    OTOH, this ISFJ dude I've been talking to since last year is a few years older than me and still in the closet from his family and friends. His upbringing was a lot more traditional though...and he's in the army, while my mom didn't even try confining me to specific gender roles as much (she let me play with both barbies and hot wheels ). He's very worried about disappointing his family and is a lot more family-oriented than I am. That could also come from the fact that he has a pretty big family and I'm an only child.
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  7. #7
    Member Paris34's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chanaynay View Post
    There was some correlational study someone posted a while ago about OKcupid populations. From what I remember, the majority of gay men were ESFJ and the majority of gay women were INTP (someone can correct me if I'm remembering the women's statistics wrong).
    @Chanaynay: Interesting theory, but I doubt there is any real correlation between types and sexuality, only stereotypes. My question is more how cognition effects someone in the questioning process; I'm curious if there are types who are better suited at reaching a conclusion about there sexuality with more ease than others.

    @velveteen: Interesting. Also from my reading up on the types, I wonder if dominant/ Aux Ti plays a part as it has a desire to categorize the world. I'm definitely guilty of this, even if its the most obscure label I will research more into it just because I want to know more. This new information could present a better way of describing something, maybe something that I overlooked as I can ever reach a conclusion because everything is subject to change and subtleties and we can never really know anything for sure. And the more I learn about the details, nuances, and branches of sexuality and gender, the more certain I become in the fact that I know nothing.

    @Jennifer: Good point. I'd definitely second that. I'd also hypothesize that IJ's may be better at reaching a conclusion as not only are they focused internally, but also their Judging functions drive them to reach a conclusion, even if it is an open ended one. Where as IP's (More likely IXTP's), similar to understanding MBTI type struggle to know who they are because they might fear overlooking information that they have yet to process because there is always more to know, more to data to experience(Se) that can be analyzed and more possibilities to consider (Ne) that might have been overlooked and need to be analyzed.

    I wonder how Si Dominates approach understanding their sexuality/gender? Would research be their primary method? Would they be in denial for a while? Would they look for past evidence to compare with new feelings arising? Or if in the grayer areas when in denial use past experiences as a way to invalidate current feelings?

    ____edit added 11:41_______
    @Seymour: I just saw your post. Yeah I went through a similar experience, not so much traditional background, but it took me a while to move past the stereotypes.

    @Chanaynay:
    Yeah, sometimes we can be our own worst enemy and prove to be biggest challenge. Even though I'm out I still struggle with self acceptance too.

    Also as for your ISFJ friend, I can imagine that it would be difficult, especially as Si dominates place so much importance on tradition, and add on the Aux (Fe) of wanting to be accommodating to those around you and not upset those you value by challenging what they have though to be true (Si-Fe). And especially if his family is traditional, that just has to make it so much more difficult with the fear of not being accepted socially.

  8. #8
    I could do things Hard's Avatar
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    I'm 6 on kinsey. Coming out was a simple painless process for me. I began to figure out I was gay when I was 13, but it wasn't entirely clear for a few years. I am kind of a sucker for forcing myself to be who I think I should be. Due to social pressure and an incidental moment I dated 2 girls in high school when I was 15. Shortly after the second I figured out I was gay with no question whatsoever now that I had tangible experience. Once confirmed, I came out to a significant number of people.
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  9. #9
    Vaguely Precise Seymour's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Paris34 View Post
    @Chanaynay: I doubt there is any real correlation between types and sexuality, only stereotypes. My question was how cognition effects someone in the questioning process, not if there is a correlation between type and sexuality.
    Actually, there have been multiple studies showing that gay men's brains appear to be a bit more feminine (on average) than straight men's brains, and that lesbians' brains tend to be a bit more masculine (again, on average)... and by masculine and feminine I mean tending to show characteristics closer to what is typical for men or women, respectively, empirically. Given that and that Thinking and Feeling are associate with gender statistically, why would you expect gay men and women to show exactly the same break down as straight men and women? Certainly the OkCupid data (such as it is) seems to show real differences according to MBTI type.

    As far as gender differences: granted there's mostly overlap for most measures of men and women, with only a few areas showing significant gender difference (such as physical strength, for example). That means that gender differences are often not very predictive of a given person's strengths (even compared to someone of the opposite gender).

  10. #10
    untitled Chanaynay's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Paris34 View Post
    @Chanaynay: Interesting theory, but I doubt there is any real correlation between types and sexuality, only stereotypes. My question is more how cognition effects someone in the questioning process; I'm curious if there are types who are better suited at reaching a conclusion about there sexuality with more ease than others.
    I'm not theorizing, I'm simply adding some background information to the thread.

    Any self-aware type will probably have an easier time figuring out their sexuality. I don't think having certain cognitive processes will help anyone figuring out their sexuality, but maybe behavioral patterns exhibited by the types might. I'd say INFPs would probably have an easier time than ESTJs for example, though an ESTJ may have an easier time coming out.
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