So, to put it plainly, I am afraid my ex boyfriend has lost his sense of self and that makes me sad.
A little background: I am an INFJ who has been in an on/off again relationship with an ENTP for the past eight years. We care very deeply about each other but it has become evident (for quite some time) that we are better off being friends. What initially attracted me to him was his intelligence, humor, charisma, sexiness, confidence, integrity and kindness. What turned me off was his arrogance, selfishness, sometimes dishonesty, and a seemingly endless push/pull dynamic that is exhausting. And I am all too open to my faults as well, believe me.
I am not posting to rehash what went wrong, or how to make things work between us, but rather to understand what it takes for an ENTP to regain his/her sense of self...he has told me time and again that he is trying to gain this back, something I refer to as his "mojo" for lack of a better word. It is the quintessential essence of the ENTP that is playful, excited about ideas, engaged, funny, and even saying things that make you think WTF?? (which is equally shocking and hilarious).
I try to get him to go out or hang with some gamer friends but he seems very reluctant. He asks me to go to the bar with him and I keep telling him that will make it difficult to talk to new people...he always had such a knack for attracting people (men and women) but now it seems he is lost in that respect. When I do go out with him he only ends up talking to me which defeats the purpose because I can talk to him at home, which I do.
Due to financial constraints and his current lack of funds we have been living together during all these make-ups and break-ups and I'm sure that has been taxing on him (as it has been on me) but I really want him to find some peace and find himself again.