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[MBTI General] [NT] Who are you easier to communicate with: NF or ST

Elaine

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Sep 16, 2013
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Just wondered who NTs find easier to talk to: Intuitive Feelers or Sensor Thinkers.
I, for example, find NFs much easier to socialize with than STs. I' m generally not a very sociable persin, it' s difficult for many people( majority of whom are of course SFs) to understand me or find common language with me. Besides, I' m rather self - sufficient: I don' t have this need to socialize like I have needs to eat or sleep. I won' t come and talk to someone unless I have a good reason for that or I really like to socialize with that person. To me, friendship is not a necessity, but more like something like a symbiosis, and a huge attachment to someone. Small talk means nothing to me, I don' t like to spend energy on spare words, and that' s why lots of people consider me weird. I haven' t met an NT in real life so far, but there is a number of NF people with whom I am in rather good terms, and who don' t consider me weird at all. Among them there are my two best friends, one INFP and one ENFP( well, she was borderline ENTP when I gave her the test, but I guess she is more F because of her short temper) . Sounds like we don' t have much in common, right? But I find it easy to find common topics to talk and reach consensus when I am with them. Of course, there are several things about them that annoy me, like irrationality and preference of subjective feelings instead of logical thinking( which I plain can' t understand) , occasional laziness and overall tenderness( INFP friend), or hot temper and being overly emotional( the ENFP friend) . But I find these differences rather tolerable, and I can say. There is als my English teacher who is an NF( can' t say which one exactly) . Many teachers in my school teach us by enforcing a certain way of thinking, and discourage anyone whose opinion differs from it. I, despite overally being an A - grade student and one of the best in class, even got my mark lowened several times for expressing oppinions that contradict more widely spread points of view in my compositions( I know, I could have written a point of view that corresponds with the one of society, but my pride cannot afford it. Most opinions of society seen primitive to me, and writing that is almost equal in my mind to dressing up in a chimpanze costume and pretending to be an ape just to please others. I don' t want to change myself just to please others, since I don' t have a reason to please others. ) . But my English teacher is not like that. She encourages students to think( even though most of my generation don' t want to, which is rather shameful) , instead of just giving the stamped way of thinking. I remember when I had to write a composition on a free topic, I decided to criticize one character from a classical novel whom many people in my country consider a role model for females, but I found this charater rather foolish and flawed, and not a good role model at all. Had it been the teacher of my country' s literature( ESFJ) the one who read this composition, I probably would have been called weird in front of the whole class( Because that' s what she does to me when I say anything that doesn' t correspond with socity' s opinion. I don' t give a damn about what the classmates think of me, however) . But my English teacher said I had a very good composition, and even said that when she was in my age( I' m currently 16, and will be 17 in less than 2 months) , she wasn' t able to question everything in a composition so openly , and to explain it so carefully. And she also helped me prepare for ESOL examinations 2 years ago( PET, to be certain) , and because of her I passed them successfully.
To me, STs are much harder to communicate with. I have an ISTJ mother, and I find it rather hard to reach consensus with her. She is literally obsessed with cleaning and schedule( like, I always need to clean up at Sunday, no later, even if I' m terribly tired) . She is very by - the - book , and both of us are quite bossy, and sometimes life at home turns into fighting for more bossing. She also believes the majority is always right, and unlike me( who believes right and wrong are subjective preferences of an individual), never questions the majority. That' s why she often tries to shape me into a more socially conventional person, believeing it is best for me( as if she is me and can really understand what is best for me) . I love her, but these are qualities rather hard to tolerate, and it can be rather difficult to reach a mutual compromise with her. I guess she also uses that to cause a feeling of guilt inside me when I oppose her, so that the probablity of me giving up would increase. What bugs me about STs is their by - the - bookishness and generalization of one' s mind. They believe that if something was best for them, it will be best for others, instead of percieving each person as an individual with unique psychology and system of interacting with the world.
And what about you? Who is easier for you to communicate with?
 

violet_crown

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To some extent, talking with STs is easier because there's less room for misinterpretation. You just speak their language and go about your day. The shared intuition with NFs can make talking with them more pleasurable, but you run into the problem of assuming more common ground than there actually is. Definitely can lead to some bad things.
 
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Julius_Van_Der_Beak

Up the Wolves
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ST. Because there is no false common ground as alluded to above. If I'm floundering, I know it.
 
W

WhoCares

Guest
ST. There has always been a mean streak to every NF I've encountered. They've always seemed to enjoy making fun of others and laughing behind their backs. I dont appreciate that particular kind of bitchiness.
 

Coriolis

Si vis pacem, para bellum
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To some extent, talking with STs is easier because there's less room for misinterpretation. You just speak their language and go about your day. The shared intuition with NFs can make talking with them more pleasurable, but you run into the problem of assuming more common ground than there actually is. Definitely can lead to some bad things.
Yes, for slightly different reasons. I communicate easier with each type in different kinds of discussions. STs are very straightforward, often focusing on facts, which does indeed minimize misunderstandings and make communication efficient, especially for task-oriented discussions. There is often a sense of limitation or confinement in this straightforwardness, though, as if the conversation can only go so far so fast.

With NFs, I can have the kind of soaring intellectual and metaphorical discussions that are like nectar of the gods. If we are on the same wavelength, the efficiency of idea transfer and the amount of ground we can cover in just a short time are unparalleled. These tend to be more social/extracurricular discussions than work-related, though.
 
R

Riva

Guest
I find it easier to bond with NFJ especially ENFJs. I don't know that many INFJs in RL and the ones I know I get along very well. However I most of these INFJs are females and I keep a verbal distance from them. It is probably a cultural thing. The one INFJ I recall I got along very well. I am not entirely sure what exactly he thought of me and I am not entirely sure it's very good since he seemed to get offended at others' actions quite a bit. However he seemed to still converse with them and maintain good relations. So I am not sure whether I was one of those people. ENFJs and I however got/get along very well. It's probably their effort and not mine.

NFPs I seem to get along well but I seldom agree with them and often believe they are out of touch with many things. However I do value their feedback since they are at most times vastly different from mine. Answering the OP in one word: I would have to say NO though I do get along well. However I do keep my distance and don't share my thoughts with them knowing that they seldom agree. (In most of my interaction I let them be the extrovert.) So my relationships with them is a safety precaution based I guess.


STP I can easily communicate. Answering the title alone I would say STPs are on top. However I can't in the long term get along with STPs though I could very well imagine marrying one and learning how to appreciate one. (Esp an ISTP.)

SFP: I find ESFPs a bit annoying and ISFPs annoyingly non communicative and often get the feeling that I have to strangle them to get them talking. (However the last observation is based on a few aspie ISFPs.) Going back to esfps I find they annoying because for them most things are based on Fi and unlike in ENFPs they don't seem to value Te at all. I find it odd that ENFPs being NPs seem to value and have a better grasp of Te. And ESFPs seem to have little capacity to tolerate/understand others' points of views.

In short answering the title + adding long term to the title: NFJ > STP > NFP > ESFP

I haven't had much experiences with ISFPs (especially ISFP women) to add them to the poll. However the ISFPs do seem to quickly understand me and agree with me though I am not sure whether this is type related, maturity on our part, personal experience or fear. Lolz.
 

chubber

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I can talk to any of those. How long the communication goes is the problem. But if I had to guess, with ST I had the longest conversations with.
 

totent

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To some extent, talking with STs is easier because there's less room for misinterpretation. You just speak their language and go about your day. The shared intuition with NFs can make talking with them more pleasurable, but you run into the problem of assuming more common ground than there actually is. Definitely can lead to some bad things.

I absolutely agree

I have both, an ST and an NF best friend. The ST is male and NF female and I feel that that has a very important role in my comfort with talking to them. My conversations with my ST friend are generally straight-forward and I do not talk really talk my mind out with him. Politics, religion and all such topics are never discussed between us. I also do not feel comfortable talking to him when I face trouble with understanding emotions. However I find it easy to find common ground with him and usually have a good time with him. The communication is more activity-based like going out to eat or playing a video game or something.
As for my conversations with my NF friend, we often talk about our ideas and thoughts about stuff and usually do not agree but we discuss them and mostly when we end the conversation, neither of us feels drained or upset by the disagreements. We can also discuss emotions and problems with each other quite comfortably and she seems to understand where I come from. However I have had some very bad moments with her and we have ended up arguing to the point that we had to take a few days to recover from the after affects.
 

Doctor Cringelord

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My best friend is INFP. That sums it up. I can let my guard down around NFs and some SFs. It's always up around STs.
 

Elaine

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My best friend is INFP. That sums it up. I can let my guard down around NFs and some SFs. It's always up around STs.
To me, SFs are a total personality clash. STs are also not the easiest to talk to as well, however. However, if they' re SPs, it makes everything easier since SPs are easier to manipulate. SJs are awfully by - the - book and always are so sure that their way is right. Like I said, I find it difficult to commune with Si - doms.
 

Debaser

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ST easily. Very straight-shooting, no bullshit types who say exactly what they mean. Even if I completely disagree with one, I respect that quality. It is especially true of ISTPs, who I find to be the "coolest" type and who I tend to get along with pretty well. They are me if I was better coordinated, worried/thought less and did more, and kept my feet on the ground and my head out of the clouds. I sometimes envy SPs' "in-the-moment" lifestyle, though I wouldn't trade the perks that come with being an N for it.

Now, as for NFs, I often find them to be some of the most fascinating types and most interesting to communicate with. But since the thread asks which is EASIEST to communicate with, it's no contest. NFs are the hardest to communicate with in many ways, which is part of the reason I like it. It's a challenge, but one that is often worth it.
 

Sunny Ghost

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To the INTJ's who said ISFP's are total personality clashes, I disagree. We share all the same traits. The other is stronger in the areas we are weak in, and make up for one another. I've had a few INTJ's friends and dated a couple as well. I find talking to INTJ's very easy as well as rewarding.

ENTJ's on the other hand are too much. Too in my space. Too unaware of their strong presence.

INTP's are generally an enigma to me. But I've enjoyed the company and friendship of many INTP's.

ENTP's are a great balance of humor and wits, in my experience.

Overall, this ISFP is a huge NT fan.

Also, more intelligent ESFP's do value Te and seem to have a lot of fun exercising it with their Se.
 

grey_beard

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I find I can communicate much easier with the NF than the ST -- UNLESS I am giving step-by-step literal instructions, as in debugging a computer application, directions, or the like.
With the NF, my Ni ignites on contact and metaphors and simile flow like wine, and the topics skip about like Hedy Lamarr's frequency-hopping. (See what I did there?)
The fanciful thoughts and thought-play (not quite puns, necessarily :( ) are effortless -- it's stopping in time to return to the real world that is the problem.
 

á´…eparted

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When I was younger definitely NF's, but as of now I think ST's. I also notice that I attract ST's a lot more often now too. NF's are still drawn to me under certain contexts, but most don't seem to last long around me. I am either too cold or too aggressive for them and it pushes most away. NF's also tend to get under my skin a lot easier than ST's by and large.
 

freeeekyyy

Cheeseburgers
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I find it easier to communicate with STs. I find it easier to relate with NFs.


Of course that's an extreme generalization.
 

Arctic Hysteria

an abyss of Nothingness
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I am INFP and I love discussing things with xNTJ. Maybe it's because of my enneagram 4w5? Maybe because of other elements?
Anyway, I love how intuitive, intellectual, clear, passionate and open to new ideas while staying focused they are.
ENTP is another story, a bit too scatterbrain for me.
 

turtlesandbees

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NF's definitely

I'm a young ENTP and I havent developed my Ti quite fully yet so I rely on Ne like 80% of the time and since i usually socialize with people around my age (aka those who havent fully developed their second function either) I really do prefer NF's but not always

Sensors around my age are just so different and its like they just dont get it sure they are fun to hang around with but i cant hold a deep conversation or discussion with them

Even though I have to censor and restrict myself a lot, I actually really enjoy discussing things with ENFP's however i do find their Fi somewhat annoying at times
But other than that i find it very easy to hold an intresting and fun conversation with them

I haven't been exposed to many other NF's so I can't speak for them yet
 
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