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  1. #1
    Senior Member Pseudo's Avatar
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    Default Worried my introversion will prevent my success

    Watching more boyfriend (ENFJ) navigate his career feild (we're both creatives) I get more and more worried that my introversion is going to prevent me from ever getting anywhere with my work. Not that I can't hold a conversation or work with people but I just never seem to be able to make the. Same connections. He texted me this morning about the project he starte today and all the friends he's all ready made at work. He's always meeting new people in his industry just talking on the street with strangers. That kind if stuff (talking to strangers, talking about my work) just never occurs to me and always seems inappropriate to me , not to mention exhausting. Anyways just wondering if any Ixxxs have insight on how to be an self employed or just get ahead and make connections when it's sort of against your nature. Lots of people tell me to "just strike up conversations!" But I think they don't realize that unlike them I don't find this enjoyable and I just don't even know where to start. Just thinkin about it make me anxious.

  2. #2
    So she did. small.wonder's Avatar
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    I hear you. For me it's been a lot about allowing networking to happen. I've often fought it, or fled from it because I perceive self promotion/networking as slimy and not authentic. The truth I've had to face though is that there are people who are genuinely interested in my work, who won't ever know about it if I don't network and market. In my case, it really started with friends and people I know being enthusiastic about my work, and encouraging me to continue and get the word out. That led to me feeling weird about it for awhile (because I doubt my abilities, and feel a bit of shame over people seeing my work), but the more I realize that majority of people respond positively to it, the more comfortable I feel.

    At the end of the day we are not Extroverts, and that's okay! That doesn't mean we can't find a way to know others, be known and share our work with people. Having an Extrovert on your arm in social situations probably doesn't hurt either! Learn from him.

    I see that you are So first, doesn't that make it a bit easier?
    Find my Enneagram writing here. Also, I'd love for you to take my six question Enneagram surveyEnneagram survey!✨

  3. #3
    brainheart
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    The introversion vs outward manifestation of self conundrum has been a lifelong struggle for me as well, so I get what you're saying all too well.

    My recommendation is just to do your work and then show it to people, engage with them that way. I don't know what sort of art you do but this can be done through etsy or social media or a blog relatively easily, and you don't have to interact with people directly.

    Extroverts recommend striking up conversations because that's what they're good at. They don't get it. I'm with an extrovert too and it's hard for him to grasp the concept that it's just not my style. I've watched him over the years accomplish so much but I don't know... I have a rich internal world that I think needed to incubate for awhile and now it's close to hatching. It's a different way of being, but not a lesser one.

  4. #4
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    Know your strengths and play to them.

    You're only in for a hassle if you stake business success on trying to be something you're not.

  5. #5
    Senior Member JClassic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pseudo View Post
    Watching more boyfriend (ENFJ) navigate his career feild (we're both creatives) I get more and more worried that my introversion is going to prevent me from ever getting anywhere with my work. Not that I can't hold a conversation or work with people but I just never seem to be able to make the. Same connections. He texted me this morning about the project he starte today and all the friends he's all ready made at work. He's always meeting new people in his industry just talking on the street with strangers. That kind if stuff (talking to strangers, talking about my work) just never occurs to me and always seems inappropriate to me , not to mention exhausting. Anyways just wondering if any Ixxxs have insight on how to be an self employed or just get ahead and make connections when it's sort of against your nature. Lots of people tell me to "just strike up conversations!" But I think they don't realize that unlike them I don't find this enjoyable and I just don't even know where to start. Just thinkin about it make me anxious.
    Yes its true, introverted people are less sucessful. Why don't you just become a computer programmer, thats popular with your INTP type. Than you don't have to talk to anyone and your skills will speak for themselves when the time comes for a promotion or whatever.

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