I choose to be solo in life because it's easier for me, not because I'm butthurt or too prideful to ask for help. As a socially orientated person you find people enlivening. I find them draining in every possible way. People take more from me than they ever give quite honestly. To watch another person make a hash of a job I can do blindfolded is painful and it takes more time and energy on my part to clean up after them than to just get the job done properly in the first place.
I work in a people job and meet approx 300 new people a day. I took this job with the idea of developing my people skills and understanding others more. It was a test to see if all that 'you've gotta work with others' advice was really worthwhile. In 6 years of doing this I think I have a pretty good sample set to go from. From what I've experienced most people....
- Dump their issues on you and try to make them your issues.
- Fail to plan or provide for themselves and try to make that your issue.
- Piss and moan like a 5yr old regardless of how old they really are as soon as they don't get their way.
- Spend prodigious amounts of time trying to take chips off the self esteem of everyone around them so they can feel better about themselves.
- Recruit others to their cause so they can oust whomever they see as an obstacle to getting their way.
- Put enormous energy into excuses for why they cannot or should not be doing something.
- Spend more time doing the above than getting anything useful done.
I'm actually quite successful at this job, but I dont enjoy it. And I have never had such a low view of humanity as I have now. I have come to the conclusion that in the main my desire to be solo was a good choice and that I am not missing out. In my job the dominant personaity type is a socially orientated, empathic person. And on the whole I find these people put more time and energy into their personal hatreds and petty issues than in getting the job they are paid to do, done. I find it annoying and counter productive.
Perhaps it would be helpful for society to accept that the solo person isn't a social reject in need of rehabilitation but that it can be a viable personal choice for people who do not receive much benefit from other people's company. I spend all day being diplomatic and understanding and coaxing goodwill out of reluctant individuals. I'm capable of being perfectly lovely and quite charming when it suits me. But I dont have to on here, what I project here is the frustrated and exhausted side of me venting. And this is how I feel most days I've had to endure an overload of other people.